Tuna Pasta
Today is the day. I woke up rejuvenated with a determination to shift my energy and vibration. I cooked a meal. A tuna pasta. It might be easy for some but it was my first time. It was monumental for me, even more as it can be semiotic at this point in my life. Could it ever be? Uhm. Maybe because I was struggling for some months now, realizing I may have made multiple decisions that I considered a failure. Oh, I was so hard on myself. I had a different energy. It went on for weeks and months. There are days I feel like I have to light up and never dwell on this, get back up. But then, I relapse and fall back again. Now, I have a great energy to start anew; if this is another cycle, I am unsure. I just want to say that there are times that you wake up feeling more giddy and "oh, life is so beautiful" but then there are also days that if you think about it, "what's the point of life?". There are days you bounce and catwalk to ariana grande and beyonce's bop songs— and then there are days you shower and get sentimental with phoebe bridgers. Some days you find self-help books and quotations meaningful; on some days, they are pretentious. What a better way to see this life that you are not alone walking in this vast valley of uncertainties, sandwiched between challenges and opportunities. "This is the day", I say. But there will be more days like this, I know. I'm young and fueled but in this life (and in this country), I hope I'll never be confused and conflicted again and again with enjoyment and passion.
