[hacker voice] I'm in

“Hear me out” and it’s the most conventionally attractive alien father figure you’ve ever seen

honey he has a fish for a head

what's next? ppl will try to gaslight me into thinking that "the tiger from zootopia who would treat me right" DOES count as a hear me out, just because he's a tiger?? or that the Robin Hood Fox is NOT a conventionally attractive fox?? be so fr

“He has a fish on his head” so does Sidon Breath Of The Wild, what’s ur point

The problem with commercial F/M romance is that it's written by the most heterosexual women alive and reading it you feel yourself slowly suffocating from the Gender of it all like a fish in a eutrophying lake. And what we actually need as a culture is F/M written by insane bisexuals violently allergic to heteronormativity

The problem is the insane bisexuals are not interested in commercializing. They write for free and publish their works on AO3.

Is this the cat that boops?

It is now!

“what’s the worst fruit” i hope you fucking die im strangling you what the hell is wrong with you. ‘the worst fruit’… has god not made all of these fruits in the same light???? cunt

Red Delicious Apples

May I someday gain the same level of succinct cutting vitriol criticism as the applerankings.

Reblog to give prev the power to write their fanfiction

Reblog to give prev the TIME to write their fanfiction

Reblog to give prev the hocus focus to write their fanfiction.

Reblog to give prev the energy to write their fanfiction

Reblog to give prev the executive function to write their fanfiction

Reblog to give prev the structural planning of the story line to write their fanfiction

When I go into ao3, I leave my critical thinking at the door. My disbelief? Suspended. As long as your characterization is plausible, I'll let you take me on any journey and say thank you at the end. Are those plotholes? Never you mind, babe. I will be pole vaulting across them like they never were. Was that a snowstorm in Cabo so they could have a cozy, single bed hotel room? Of course, I'm no meteorologist. Keep em coming, hun. Just know I'm leaving Kudos at the end and kissing you on the lips.

you can post on tumblr even when you're trying to take a break from social media it literally doesn't count. it's like pepsi max, or pescatarianism

Hehehehehe

Can I fucking help you?

my senior english teacher told me that any scene with a woman in a cornfield in every piece of literature ever is about her journey to womanhood/pleasuring herself in the field and i just.... believed her

What

What

reverse suicide note where everyone you write on it dies

wait

and we could call it something like... murder note.. or something.. Kill note.. die note... we can workshop it later