batsbrina

https://archiveofourown.org/works/66012376/chapters/170091199

2

Marvel Rivals layouts! cnd + sue’s new skins!! I love making layouts 😊 (cnd gif made by meeee)

Jason: Don’t do that!

Tim: …Why not?

Jason: uh….I have a gun! *popping noises*

Tim: that was a gun?

Jason: …it’s a quiet gun

Tim: you know what? I don’t have time for this. I’m coming in *walks in*

Jason:

Tim: …is that bubble wrap

Jason: it’s therapeutic

Tim:

Tim: Im just gonna go

Bruce: Come home, Jaylad, I bought you a new phone.

Alfred: Come home, Master Jason, I made your favorite meal.

Dick: Don't come home little wing-they found your cigarette pack.

Tim: *taking pictures of Damian on his first date*

Jason, popping up behind him: Tim, what the fuck are you doing?

Tim, without flinching: Making a scrapbook.

Jason: A… scrapbook??

Tim: For posterity.

They work with a man who dresses like a Bat who's name is Batman. Maybe creativity just isn't Gotham strong suit, who are they to judge.

Dick works fine with the League, they get away with not having to use his name that frequently, and Superman is the only one who really talks to him, so its fine that he calls him chum- the man practically raised him- until one day he's on a mission with the Lanterns and Hal screams "CHUM" at the top of his lungs and Dick just bluescreens for a second because- what?

Jason is heading out with a couple of the outlaws and passes Green Arrow who just smiles, pats him on the shoulder and goes "Have fun Firecracker. Don't hurt 'em too badly!" And Jason is like ??? Thanks??? I guess???

Tim just thinks the League is slightly condescending but also kinda soaks up all the affection because they keep calling him "sweetheart" for some reason???

Steph gets called "Treasure" a total of one time before she shuts that down real fast

Cass gets called "Princess" and is like "??? ok" and when Dick heard about it he zoomed to the WatchTower to rectify that problem immediately- she might be Bruce's Princess but she is the League's Queen, thank you very much

Damian just accepts that he is Princeling, he kinda assumes every Robin gets called that because... Batman is King??? It also leads the League to believe he and Cass are siblings- the only connection they tie from all of the Gotham vigilants

Barbara never visits anymore, but one time Bruce accidentally left her on call instead of hanging up, and suddenly seven leaguers were shouting "hey Doll!" As a greeting. She thought it was hilarious and sent it to the groupchat.

Dick: *muffled snickers* there's no- Jason. there's no way.

Jason: *shuffles, the scrape of boots against stone* no hold on i can- i swear to god.

Dick, incredibly amused: *giggling* you cannot do this to me,

Tim: the hell are you two doing over there?

Dick: Jason's trying on the Nightwing suit-, yOU'RE GONNA TEAR THE ELBOW STOP WAIT-

Jason: ok if the fabric tears because of this then you really shouldn't be wearing it in knife fights. *strained* i got it... i just need to-

Tim: why the fuck are you- aren't you guys in public!?

Dick, absently, still amused: nah, enclosed rooftop hidden by an AC vent.

Tim: ....wait what the fuck are YOU wearing while he tries it on?

Dick: nothing and it's about to rain so hurry the fuck up Jason, i'm cold.

Tim: oh my god send me your location i'm on my way-

Jason: how the fuck do you not feel completely on show with this skin-tight shit- look how big my calves look in this thing!

Tim: i'm like one minute away from you guys hold on. Dick why don't you try on the Red Hood outfit?

Dick: when Jason took it off to try on my suit he accidentially dropped it off the edge of the roof and we can't be bothered to go get it.

Tim: ok i'm here- holy fucking shit. Jason how are you wearing that.

Jason, very strained: i like. cannot breath very well. look at my ass in this though it's like, almost bursting through the fabric- Tim do not fucking poke my ass i swear to god-

Tim, in awe: the tensile strength is struggling, dude. do you think it would break if you tried to do a flip or fighting move?

Dick: if we stick around long enough for somebody to need our help we'll find out. i'm honestly a little offended-

*two pings*

Dick: -like, am i petite? i thought i was well formed but now i feel small.

Bruce: Robin and i are en-route to your three's location, we need a group rendezvous. we have discovered information pertaining to last night's case.

Dick, casually: B, is Jason's ass bigger than mine?

Bruce, stumbling slightly: what?

Jason: oh my ass is definitely bigger than yours, it fills this suit out so much more than you do.

Dick, whining: but everybody in Gotham says Nightwing has the best ass of the bats!

Tim, absently: best doesn't always mean bigger,

Jason: yeah you would say that- stop POKING it- THIS IS SEXUAL ASSAULT YOU ASSHOLE.

Bruce: what on earth are you boys doing? we're almost at your location.

Tim: try striking a sexy pose. yeah- exactly like that. god i wish i had my camera right now, this could be sold for so much money,

Dick, distraught: you can't be sexier than me! Jason- Jason fucking stop it. cover your face up again- Tim go get his helmet-

Tim: we could make this a horny calendar.

Damian: father may i leave the call? i don't like these people.

Bruce, sighing: whatever you're all doing needs to stop now anyway, we're almost at your- what the fuck.

Dick: oh. hey. how has your guys' night been?

Damian: i've changed my mind, this is great. Todd you look like your head is about to explode.

Jason: i actually think my blood circulation stopped like three minutes ago. Tim if you poke my ass ONE MORE TIME-

Bruce, aghast: what on earth would posses you to- in public-?! Nightwing, put your clothes back on, and Red Hood- where are your clothes?

Dick: think of it as temperature training. do you know how cold my nipples are right now?

Jason: my ass is definitely bigger than yours, Dick.

Dick: bECAUSE OF THE FUCKING LAZARUS PIT- YOU BASICALLY GOT ASS ENLARGEMENT SURGERY FROM RA'S.

Damian: you sound jealous, Richard.

Dick: WHY WOULD I- take off my fucking suit Jason you're gonna break it.

Bruce, still horrified: what if a civillian saw you!??! your identities could be-

Tim: who cares about identities? they're gonna think they caught Red Hood and Nightwing in a sex romp. people will think Jay and Dick are fucking, that's what needs to be focused on here.

Jason: like Dickie bird could land somebody with this kind of ass,

Dick: -FUCK YOU-!

Bruce, gritted: put. on. some. clothes.

Jason: jesus. fine, prude. Day, go get my suit so i can take this thing off- TIM I CAN FUCKING SEE YOU BEHIND ME DO NOT.

Tim: *evil cackle*