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It's wild to watch the phrase "tumblr sexyman" morph into "man that tumblr thinks is sexy," because when I first saw the phrase come into use, I always saw it used in reference to the phenomenon of "when presented with a wide array of fictional characters, tumblr will always pick the skinny white man to obsess over, and if the fan-favorite character has no canonical human appearance, the fandom will inevitably create a popular fanon of the character as as a skinny white man."
When I hear "tumblr sexyman," I think of Cecil Night Vale being constantly depicted as a skinny white man instead of literally anything else. I think of the background character white men who get elevated over protagonists that are women, people of color, or otherwise not the white man power fantasy.
"Tumblr sexyman" is, like. An insult. I DON'T want any of my blorbos to win a "tumblr sexyman" poll. "Tumblr sexyman" is the exact opposite of what I want my own OCs to be. If any of my characters ever get called "tumblr sexyman," I will have to immediately re-evaluate myself and the art I'm making.
Things I think of when I hear "tumblr sexyman":
Cecil Night Vale, as previously mentioned.
Oncelercest, because if there aren't two skinny white men to ship, tumblr fandom will start shipping the skinny white man with himself.
Bill Cipher inexplicably being fanon'd as a white twink despite being a fucking triangle.
Everyone fawning over Marvel Loki while shoving every woman and Black person in the MCU aside.
The way nearly every single character in Hazbin Hotel has the same "tall and skinny" body type, along with all the criticisms Black audience members have made about the issues with Alastor's design.
The way tumblr got obsessed with the white man villain in Sinners.
I hate you Ozempic craze I hate you 'heroin chic' I hate you weight loss ads on public radio I hate Burn Fat Fast ads every thirty seconds I hate you I hate you I hate you
I grew up before the term 'thigh gap' was invented I grew up before 'hip dip' was invented I was born before 'muffin top' was a thing before 'clean girl look' was a thing before 'glass skin' was a thing before razoring off peach fuzz was a thing and I'm so so so fucking tired of us inventing new concepts purely for the purpose of convincing people to hate their own bodies enough to buy products
Last time Tuberculosis ran through the USA a small number of people got it on purpose to look skinny and waifish and delicate and used makeup to look flushed and bony and when the Victorians figured out tapeworms people would infect themselves on purpose to starve themselves smaller and women and now in the year of our lord 2026 there is a noticeable fraction of the USAmerican population genuinely thrilled about a treatment-resistant microbial parasite that makes you shit and vomit your brains out for a month because side effects include weight loss and STILL we talk about being skinny like it's the natural default setting for all healthy people as if it's a self-sustaining standard and not an imaginary goal that we are constantly constantly constantly beating ourselves with a whip to acheive

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more of these. and GREEN IS HERE THIS TIME π
random autistic teenager posting crayon drawings of the cows from home on the range playing badminton on deviantart and not taking criticism well or something: egregious lolcow. must be stalked and documented in every aspect of her life with moment-to-moment updates, baited into publicly humiliating herself, etc
rich botoxed influencer from dayton, OH who goes on tiktok tirades about how activism is cringe and ironically jokes ironically about how some ethnic groups are ironically subhuman: literally such an icon. the gays love her. reaction gifs of her on every website. it's noooot that serious diva
living in your parents house as an adult is a humiliation ritual why am i in the group chat at 23 years old going βI HATE MY DADβ
i really cannot stand the character archetype in film of the "unpopular nerdy ugly girl" being portrayed by the most conventionally attractive, thin, clear-skinned actress ever you cannot tell me that amanda goddamn seyfried was some fugly lesbigay loser as a foil to megan fox you cannot tell me beloved babyfaced winona ryder was a social outcast at her school you cannot convince me that rachel sennott and ayo edebiri are notoriously "ugly, untalented gays" even riverdale lampshaded this by fully acknowledging that cheryl shouldnt have starred as carrie in the school play and it shouldve been ethel cause ethel is The Fat One Nobody Likes and ethel even IS chubby enough that you could actually consider her "fat" but she's still an acceptably Cute type of fat but in the end she STILL gets denied the role anyway. real ugly and/or fat girls are straight up not allowed to exist on camera even when the narrative tells you they're there they're not actually there. im just so tired. where is the acne. [flinging myself against the walls of my padded cell] where is the acne where is the acne wwhere is the fucking acne
having a canonically male blorbo who you headcanon to be a woman is torture nexus for many reasons but one of them being having to clear your name whenever tagging her in a post about women I MEAN IT WHEN I SAY SHES A WOMAN TO ME I MEAN IT. IM NOT LIKE THESE BITCHES TAGGING SPAMTON

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One of the most important images of all time
MY FUCKING CAR
brain explosion meme. while compiling images for this post i also realized orange joins her in the shop later awwwww
starting July 4 we will be deploying high testosterone tier one operators in every american city with the express purpose of locating and eliminating through hyperlethal vectors the sick and demented Caine, and liberating pomni, ragatha, and others from his Appalling Digital Circus with operation American Decisive Combat
"Game maker wants you to feel bad for playing the game" well sure. Only because feeling bad can also be fun and interesting. Book and movie also make me feel bad emotions
Sure the media might be making you feel bad for being the audience of the media but the artist made the thing for you to engage with and wants you to engage 90% of the time. At most they want you to introspect about fiction and your relationship to it and if there's anything bad about it. But not actually turn off the game. Its fun to feel bad. Honestly I like when creators hate their audience and spit malice at me directly as well. Slay

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i am of the sincere belief that if ur on ur computer a lot you should visually customize it to high hell and back not just for funsies but also because it has literally made me less depressed before. its kind of like how rearranging your bedroom is good for your brain, yknow. i do stuff like this every few months
and if anyone wants to follow suit
LIVE WALLPAPER: wallpaper engine. only thing on here that costs any money (its like 5 bucks on steam). im sure theres free alternatives but this one has a lot of presets and stuff so its less hassle and its what i use. might be a bad idea for lower end pcs tho
CUSTOM TASKBAR: retrobar on github (lots of different options)
CUSTOM CURSOR: theres a lot of places to find these, but rw-designer open cursor library is a good place to start
DISCORD: betterdiscord, im using the clearvision v7 theme with a custom background
EXTENSIONS (these are for firefox, might or might not exist on other browsers):
tabliss for the new tab theme
stylus for tumblr -> specifically the 'tumblr - custom dashboard pallette' theme for colors + bg, and this for the pre-twitterifcation layout
enhancer for youtube for custom youtube colors
the browser theme is just one i found on the firefox theme 'store'
Mike Flanagan's The Picture of Dorian Gray: Dorian and Sybil get married and Dorian is saved by the redemptive power of family.
Mike Flanagan's Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde: Mr. Hyde is snapped out of it by his daughter (who he has in this version) nobly sacrificing himself so that she and Jekyll can live happily ever after.
Mike Flanagan's The Yellow Wallpaper: the narrator gets to see her baby and is so overcome with love that she recovers and rejoins the family.
Mike Flanagan's The Woman In Black: Arthur manages to reunite Jennet and Nathaniel's ghosts, and they walk off into the sunset together holding hands.
Mike Flanagan's We Have Always Lived In The Castle: Constance and Merricat hug it out.
Mike Flanagan's The Ring: Reiko adopts Sadako's ghost and raises her with Yoichi.