creaming and scrying

New hairstyle “monkhawk” which is like the tonsure of a medieval European monk gelled to stick straight up forming a basket-like shape

the sewing machine is like if a horse and an inkjet printer had a child

would y’all ever date someone with the same name as you?

I’m sorry for adding directly to a post but I went to a wedding once where the groom’s name was Loren and the bride’s name was Lauren and at the end the officiant was all “introducing Loren [surname] and Lauren [surname], husband and wife” and the entire assembled lost it

also sorry for adding on but at my high school there was a Dominic and a Dominique who were dating and everyone just called them “Dom and Dommer” which is honestly the funniest shit ever

Had to submit it to the tags for peer review

I know a woman with 2 first names, whose last name growing up was Chapman. She married a man whose last name was Chapman. So her name is Something Someone Chapman Chapman.

My friend Sam is dating someone else named Sam. They refer to this as Sams Club.

they sell items at tjmaxx that even God is not aware of

these days the circus isn't funny and the bread kills you

beer before beer that's ✌️two beers

holy shit i love grieving things before they’re gone

shell of a person is such an apt description like yeah i feel exactly like that rn

you need daddy to complete you

daddy needs to be euthanized

You're not allowed to watch morally questionable movies because you're prone to evil and it can corrupt you. Whereas I'm allowed to watch morally questionable movies because I'm such a good person that the movies are actually redeemed by my consumption of them. If I write a favorable letterboxd review the rehabilitative effect is even stronger. But you are still not allowed to watch them in that case. Ok?