FanFiction Library

title: you know I will adore you (‘til eternity) category: the vampire diaries ship: damon/bonnie faceclaims: C A S T word count: 17,569 summary: “Run all you want, but it won’t change anything, Bonnie. It doesn’t matter what world we’re in, you’ll always be my wife.” After being sucked up into what they assumed would be oblivion, Damon and Bonnie soon find themselves in an idyllic little town where they’re free to find peace. Which is exactly what they have for twelve years, until reality comes calling to bring them home.

preview:

Bonnie stared at him a long moment. “You’re different.”

Damon’s mouth kicked up at the corner. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“You’re not so… chaotic. Or as much of an asshole. At least not lately.”

He wiggled his eyebrows. “Oh, I can still be an asshole when I feel like it.”

She snorted. “You know what I mean.”

“I get it. I’ve grown and matured while we were away.”

Her mouth flattened. “Did I?” As soon as she asked, she wanted to take it back. To eat the words that betrayed her, laying her insecurities bare. But she didn’t. She let them hang there, in the air, like an ever-present guillotine, waiting to drop.

title: Seeing Stars author: Coraxes // @attolirene​ category: the vampire diaries rating: teen genre: romance/friendship status: wip word count: 6k+  summary:  Bonnie’s sick of Mystic Falls, and death might be the only chance she has to get out of it. Damon comes along too, of course. [Bamon ficlet series, 1994 AU. No Kai.]

why you should read it: both bonnie and damon are in character. the snap-shot quality of each scene is great and really gives weight to each individual moment. the banter is fantastic and very them. the slow burn is nicely paced, giving us little moments where it’s clear they want more even if they’re in denial. it’s fun, well written, and worth the read. 

Read on FF.net or Archive of our Own

Damon pressed a few fingers to his throat as he mimicked gagging noises. God, [his parents] did this stupid song and dance every single time they came home. Schmoopy kisses, disgusting nicknames, cheesy reminders… they’d been married almost thirty years and the honeymoon still wasn’t over. The honeymoon would never be over.

“Stop being overdramatic. It’s kind of cute,” Stefan said, rolling his eyes at Damon’s (perfectly normal) gestures.

Medications change people’s chemistry, it effects their breath and their smell, if ever so slightly, so it takes him a moment to recognize hers. She’s wearing sweatpants and a grey cardigan without buttons. She has lost more than a few pounds and that fire in her eyes that made him want to poke at her until all her attention was on him.

What happened to her? How did she end up here? This is not her place, his reason protests, but all gets muted in his head when he sees her small hands reaching out, holding on to Enzo’s arm, whom looks all too happy to let her. He calls her love, and kisses her mouth and she looks like she’s going to sink her nails into his flesh just so that she can keep a piece of him with her.

Damon enters the hallway before her eyes can meet his, back against the wall trying to understand.

“You didn’t tell me why you’re here,” she says, and it’s been so long since Damon heard her voice that his heart speed up without his consent.

“My mouth was otherwise occupied,” that’s something he would say “I wouldn’t leave you,” he hears Enzo add with a more sincere tone. 

Those were the words he should have told her three years ago. His arm was sopposed to be the one she held on to, for support. Instead he abandoned her, and she found a replacement, one appropriately hungry for her attention, for her love.

“I know,” she says, voice tired and amazed, like she could not believe someone would care for her so much.

He was truly a shitty best friend, wasn’t he?

#

He hides from Enzo. He hides from Bonnie, stays close enough to hear her breathing under the creepy silence of this cold place that’s supposed to help put the fire back in her eyes.

He hears the rustling of the sheets of her bed, the steps of the uninterested nurse that brings her a tray with a minuscle pudding and a plastic cup with a pill that rolls in it, hitting the weak walls of the cup.

“Your medicine, Miss Bennett,” the woman says in her best imitation of a caring tone, “Open your mouth, Miss Bennett. Let me see,” she says and he cannot believe Bonnie decided to be here, cannot think or imagine about what drove to put herself through this. It’s humiliating and lonely and her life was not supposed to turn out like this.

#

The walls are empty, and so is the tiny room she’s staing. He can see her laying in her bed, curled up on the side, hair pushed back behind her ears, dark shadows under her closed eyes, so very pale.

He opens the door after stealing the key from the night shift nurse and hovers next to her for long moments before deciding to sit in a corner. Bonnie looks so tired he’s scared to see her reaction, or better her lack of reaction. The idea that her fire is completly out scares him shitless. The thought that the only strenght left in her is the one she uses to hold on to Enzo like a madwoman is unbareable. So he sits and watches like the stalker he is. So he sits and watches and wait for a sign that she’s not lost to him, that he didn’t fuck up bad enough yet.

When he raises her eyes on her, hers are open in his direction. He’s not sure she can see him because she doesn’t move nor speaks. Until she does.

“My doctor says I should talk to you,” she says, breaking the breath in him. She looks oddily calm but she is speaking to him and it almost makes him dizzy.

“She says that this,” she stops, takes a breath, starts again, “She says that the allucinations is the way my subconscious tries to cope with what happened, but you won’t go away until I let myself find closure.” she explains, “It’s not like I didn’t know, deep down,” she armits with a trembling smile and a voice that almost breaks. Only almost.

“I didn’t want you to go away,” she armits, out of breath, with tired eyes and every muscle in her body going tense. Damon wants to speak up, tell her to not let him go away now, that there’s no need to close a thing because he’s back but is he really? Isn’t he offering himself up for slaughter? What’s the point in opening a wound he can’t be there to see heal?

“Not back then, not now,” she adds, “But the choice was not mine. And you weren’t either. I just-”

The words make poor sense and tough the sound is so unintrusive they are loud in his brain.

“I was so mad at you. So mad at myself, for letting you in, for thinking you would stay. That I was worth you staying.” she looks very tired, just about to go out with barely a whimp, “But it was my fault, I know that now. We all make our choice and have to live with it. Yours was always Elena, I knew that but I thought I could… I just wanted to keep you for a while, you know. My best friend. But before that you were Elena’s boyfriend.” yes, but if that’s true why trying to find confort in the thought of Elena could never bring relief, why all he saw for threey years were her green eyes and her wet cheeks, why all he heard was her broken voice accusing him, telling him You hurt me. 

“You’re probably dreaming of her now. Even desiccating you’re probably happy just because you’re next to her. It must be nice,” she says with a sad smile, “To know your place, who you belong to.” she explains, “Sometimes I think I might belong to Enzo.” 

She stops talking and he can feel anguish twisting his guts, he wants to protest, tell her she’s wrong, she can’t belong to an asshole like Enzo, she is so much better then him, so much better than himself.

“Sometimes he reminds me of you,” she says, choking on an humorless laughter. What does that mean?

“I only know that he’s here with me and you are not,” she says, eyes fixed into his, “You would be here if you cared about me. But you are not and I won’t keep you anymore. So I need to say the words, because even if they won’t make any difference to you, they will to me.”

His hearing strains on its own, and his body is so tense that he’s ready to hear the tearing of the muscles at the first touch it will receive. He’s so hungry for her truth that his stomach closes like a fist, crumpling on nothing.

“I didn’t know,” she smiles, empty, “Or maybe I just convinced myself that I didn’t. But… you were my best friend. You were… everything. And when I lost you I lost myself.”

“I was stupidly, blindly in love with you, Damon” she confesses, out of breath, laughing as her falling tears draw dark dots on her pillow that smells of disinfectant.

I loved you too, something whispers in him, leaving him dazed and spechless. It’s like a earthquake, breaking down all the walls he’s put up to never let himself drift from Elena, and he can see it, the reason why all he saw and all he hears while hunger gnawed at him was nothing else but Bonnie. It screams into him now, the truth, paralyzing and scary, I love you too. Because she doesn’t love him anymore, she can’t, how could she still?

“And I went mad just to keep you here, just to believe you would come back for me.” she bites at her lower lip, through the tears, “Bit it all ends now.” she decide, a crumble of that strenght he knew appearing in front of him again.

“Goodbye, Damon,” she says, before rolling on her back and on the other side.

She pays no attention to his hand reaching out to her, never knows that he’s there. That he’s there because he cares about her, that he was never happy without her, that she is everything still.

And he can’t say that without breaking her heart for the second time. So he waits in a corner, makes no noice, watches her as she drifts into sleep before he lets himself get close.

Damon brushes the hair off her temple,  bends down so that he can smell her skin under the disinfectant and the medications and the salt of her tears.

“I’m sorry,” he says, fighting to keep his voice steady, to keep his breath from breaking, failing to do so, “I didn’t know… I was stupid. And I was blind. And I love you.”

“I’m sorry” he repeats, pressing his lips against the tender skin of her, “Don’t forgive me. Just go on,” he tells her, breaking his own heart “I love you.”

 Bonnie and Damon in Caroline’s closet.

“What’s your routine?”

He blinked at the sudden change of topic, struggling to keep up with her token drunk person ADD. She was scattered and curvy and smelled like coconut and tequila and under any other circumstances, he’d be enjoying the hell out of it, but right now she was drunk and judgment-impaired and he was reasonably certain he was dying so all this was doing was confusing the shit out of him. “My what?”

“For getting all these people to sleep with you, like it can’t just be that your pretty.”

He donned a humorless smile. “Outrageous charm and wit also factor in, but mostly it’s my humility.”

Bonnie snorted. “You’re really not that charming.”

“And yet,” his face took on an expression of mock-bewilderment, “you’re still pressed up against me.”

“I wanna see them.”

“See what?”

“Your moves.”

“I don’t have ‘moves’.”

“Yeah you do, you’re a total Moves Guy. Moves McPherson.”

“What did I say about nicknames?”

“MoOoOoVeS,” she said, waggling her eyebrows and doing the wave with her arms, and in a wonderfully confusing development, it was both the nerdiest shit he’d ever seen and turning him on, since the movement had her hips jostling against his.

“I don’t—”

“Move-itize me, Captain.”

“Are you quoting Captain Crunch?”

She shook her head, arms still undulating in a free-form, hippie-like wave. “Captain Coitus.”

“Christ, these nicknames.”

“We. Want. Moves.”

“Bonnie—”

“WE. WANT. MOVES. WE. WANT—”

He winced at the volume shift, lifting a halting hand, “Okay, okay, Jesus, fine.”

She immediately stopped her dancing, straightening up and regarding him with a blunt stare. “Alright, go.”

“For starters,” he muttered, grabbing her shoulders and forcing her to take a step back. His body immediately craved the plaint warmth of hers and he tiredly ignored it. “I need to be able to think.”

“This seems like an inefficient start.”

“Well, generally by the time a girl’s draped all over me in a closet, I don’t need ‘moves’, so,” he countered irritably, and she pursed her lips in thought.

“Fair.”

things you said while we were driving

“We don’t have to stop.” 

Bonnie looks up from the magazine in her lap and raises an eyebrow at him. Her feet are on the dash, toenails freshly painted, despite his worries that she might spill polish on his upholstery. The windows are down and a nice breeze is kicking her hair up; it feels good, freeing. 

They put Mystic Falls in the rearview mirror three days ago and with every mile put between her and her hometown, she feels the chains of expectation and sacrifice grow looser. With no destination in mind, they just drive, wherever the open road takes them. They’ve got a tank full of gas and a need to get away, go somewhere, anywhere, that won’t throw another freak-of-the-week in their path. 

“I don’t know about you, but I’m going to need a pit stop within the hour.” 

He purses his lips at her, rolls his eyes. “We don’t have to go back,” he clarifies. 

Laying her magazine down flat, she leans her head back against the seat and turns it toward him. “Is that your way of saying you don’t want to go back?” 

He frowns, turning his gaze out to the road. “You don’t get tired of it? The fighting and bloodshed and weekly near-death experiences?” 

“Sure,” she admits, with a faint shrug. “But I didn’t figure you for a quiet life in a cul-de-sac somewhere, playing house-husband.” 

He grins at her. “You planning on putting a ring on it, Bennett?” 

She snorts. “You know what I mean.” 

“So we skip the cul-de-sac schtick. What’s wrong with a penthouse suite with a view? Huh? You can go to school somewhere else, somewhere with a smaller murder-count, and see how life without looming death feels.” 

She stares at his profile, at the way his hands flex nervously on the steering wheel. “It’s that what this roadtrip was about? You wanted to convince me to leave Mystic Falls permanently?” 

“I’m not sending you away to live a life of boring solitude, Bon-Bon. I’m going with you… I don’t want you to keep dying on me, sure, but I also don’t want you to lose your edge.” He smirks. “Gotta keep you on your toes.” 

Her mouth kicks up, but she bites her lip to hide her amusement. “A penthouse, huh?” 

He looks excited then, bright blue eyes flashing. “With a view…”

“Of?” she wonders. 

He looks over at her, and there’s something soft and hopeful and warm about the face he’s making, the sincerity of his gaze. “Whatever you want. Say the word.” 

Written by: lydiasfears

Prompt: After three years of separation Bonnie must stand face to face with a man whom she cannot forgive

Characters: Bonnie Bennett, Damon Salvatore

Beta reader: none

Sadly no one wanted to help me but I truly wanted to show you my one shot which I wrote a few weeks ago. I’m aware of the fact that my english isn’t perfect, it’s not my native language. Anyway I hope I didn’t make many mistakes and you’ll enjoy it :)

It was a cold morning. Light breeze wrapped Bonnie who was sitting on the bench. The woman put her hands into the sleeves of the sweater and watched the water in the lake slightly rising and falling. She felt calm, surrounded by immense silence. Here and there could only hear the birds singing or the crunch of the grass under the feet of the people living in the resort.

She closed her eyes and let herself drown in this beautiful silent. If it was that easy, she would never open her eyes again.

At some point someone joined her. With a fluid movement he sat on the bench, leaving a small gap between him and Bonnie. She immediately guessed who it was. Actually she was waiting for his visit, fearing how she would react when she would finally hear his voice and see his face that has haunted her in her dreams. Bonnie slowly opened her eyes but she didn’t look at him. She surveyed the lake.

“Hi, Bonnie. It’s been awhile,” Damon said faintly. Her heart began to beat faster, and her breath got stuck in her throat. She felt as if finally, after three years, something unblocked in her. At the same time overwhelmed her the excess of feelings, a wave of anger, sadness and grief flooded her from the inside. His voice hurt her, when he continued, “I know I’m the last person in the world that you want to see…”

“Then why are you here, Damon?” She interrupted him quietly, despite the fact that she wanted to scream. She wanted to hurt him as much as possible to make him feel what she had felt. Carefully Bonnie looked into his eyes and almost shuddered, when she found sincere sadness in his eyes. She had already forgotten about the pretty blue of his eyes. “To make me feel miserable? To hurt me once again?”

Bonnie didn’t know how long she could endure his presence. For three years she had been struggling with his leaving and imagining his return. But she wasn’t able to prepare for this moment. Although she composed in her head a lot of speeches, it was hard to tell him anything without anger or tears.

“I wanted to check on my best friend,” he admitted. He looked back at the resort and added facetiously, “Creepy place. Probably full of cockroaches and lunatics having problem with distinguishing the walls from the people. This is not the place for you, Bon Bon.”

Her right hand brushed her hair back from her face, and then Damon took the opportunity to gently grab her hand. She gasped, remembering how wonderful had been those little tendernesses between them three years ago. How she had drank his blood, which hadn’t tasted so bad, how she had held his hand or hugged to his safe and warm body. This moment of melancholy and desire for his touch was brief. Bonnie rebuked herself for still having feelings for this egoist. She jumped up from the bench, turning her back to confused Damon.

“Living here is quite alright,” she replied harshly, looking at the resort. “At least people who live her understand me. I don’t attach emotionally, so I’m not prone to be hurt.”

“Come on, Bon, it’s not who you really are.” Damon slowly got up and took a step toward the woman. She shivered from the cold and her feelings. “You care more about people than about yourself, you are a loving person who deserves a better life. Here you will experience no happiness.”

“You think I don’t know that?” She raised her voice, turning to him. In her eyes the anger boiled up when she looked at Damon’s face. “You made me feel this way! You were the only person who was there for me and you just left. You were my best friend and you left me alone. I’m lonely and sad and angry and it’s all because of you!”

The vampire knew she was right and he didn’t feel good about it. Frankly, since Stefan had woken him, Damon most feared about his conversation with Bonnie. He knew that she would still be mad, that forgiveness wouldn’t come easy. He didn’t expect, however, that Bonnie would be so broken. Pain which he saw in her eyes, that could be seen in her constricted movements, her body and lips, it all made him feel like slowly dying. The sight of his friend in such a state broke his heart, and even as he tried not to worry, he finally felt awful and would do anything to just once again see the smile on Bonnie’s face.

She watched him carefully and felt moved by how much Damon was impressed by her presence. He hadn’t changed over these three years, but Bonnie couldn’t remember seeing him so frustrated, helpless and angry at himself. She knew he regretted his decision, but she didn’t want to make it easy for him. He had to pay for his mistakes, feel the pain with which she had been living for so long.

“I did it for you, Bonnie,” he conceded ardently. “I did it for you and Stefan to make both of you safe. You were protecting me, you were even willing to die for me, and I couldn’t allow it. While sitting next to your bed in the hospital, when you were unconscious, I reached the conclusion that it would be better if I left. Without me you were safer.”

Damon held out his hand toward her but Bonnie didn’t move. Her eyes were filled with tears and she didn’t feel the cold reigning around her anymore. She didn’t even feel the wind which had become stronger. She felt empty internally, as if her heart already had broken. Still, for some reason she was still alive, or maybe only existed, because life couldn’t be called like that. Something in her died for good.

“I would rather die for you that live without you,” she whispered, her cheeks wet with tears. “And that would be my choice, not yours.”

She turned to leave, and then Damon grabbed her hand and turned her in his direction. With the other hand he gently ran down her cheek, wiping tears and lightly touching a trembling lip.

“I’m your best friend, Bon, please don’t hate me.”

“Perhaps it’s the problem,” she said flatly with no strength to push him away. “You know, this whole best friend thing. If I were someone more than your friend, if you loved me, then you wouldn’t hurt me. So it’s how it is with you, Damon. For Katherine, then for Elena you could do anything. But when it comes to your friends, you can stick a knife in their back without hesitation.”

Damon looked down, and Bonnie continued, ignoring the fact that she could say too much. She wanted to hurt him, she wanted to get rid of all the feelings that swirled in her for three years. “I can’t hate you,” she confessed. “And this is the worst. Despite everything, I love you. I still love you, but I can’t forgive you. You don’t reciprocate my feelings, you see me as a friend who you care about but not enough. No, Damon. I suffered because of you for three damn years. Now you’ll see what it’s like to be alone. You’ll live in the world where someone loves you but doesn’t want you anymore.”

“Bonnie,” he begged but she pulled away from him and headed for the resort. For a moment he wanted to catch her, even if he couldn’t move.

things you said when you thought i was asleep

Damon sits on the coffee table, inches from her, watching as she lays curled up on the couch, a plaid blanket tossed across her small form. There’s a cut across her forehead, a bit of his drying blood on her chin, and dark bags under her eyes. She’s tired, exhausted, and part of this is his fault. He knows this. There’s a lot that’s his fault, things he’s not even sure how to apologize for. And there’s a part of him that doesn’t think he should have to. That wants to defend his actions, to explain himself, to show he was just trying to do the right thing. For her. 

He’s not sure when so many of his decisions became about saving Bonnie Bennett, but they have, and he doesn’t regret that. It’s a nice change of pace, really. But it chews at his nerves a little, tells him things he’s not sure he’s ready to face. Because Damon is a selfish creature for the most part, always has been. He saves people because he loves them, or because they benefit him, or because someone he loves wants him to, and he’s afraid that if he doesn’t, they won’t love him anymore. Fear plays a big part in his life, and it’s tied to love far too often for his liking. He’s afraid of Bonnie; of losing her and of loving her and of what that means. 

He reaches for her, pushing her hair back from her forehead and off her cheek. Her skin is warm under the tips of his fingers, smooth and soft. He lets his knuckles slide down the slope of her neck, where her pulse pumps steadily. 

“I missed you,” he murmurs. 

He remembers the last few moments as he laid in the coffin, when his heart struggled, when his arteries seized, when his skin dried up. Thinking of her, telling himself it was the right thing to do, that she’d forgive him someday, hopefully, maybe. But she was right, he thought of her, of how hurt she was, how she cried for him, how her voice caught, thinking he didn’t care enough to stay, to live out her last sixty years with her. And maybe he regretted it as his muscles went rigid and his body shut down, too hungry to move or act or think. Maybe he regretted that was the last time he would see her face. And maybe he was glad, just a little bit, when Stefan woke him up, because now he had a chance to fix it, change it somehow. To make her understand. 

There are a lot of things he wants to say, things he’s not sure she’ll hear, things he’s not sure he can tell her to her face, not when she’ll dig and question and ask him what he means. So he sits there, so close and so far, and he tells her, “We both know I’m an idiot. I don’t think anybody would argue that point. But for the record… I did it to protect you.” His throat tightens. “I did it because I… I love you. And I don’t know how or why or when, but… I do. But if there’s one thing that never changes, it’s my track record when it comes to love. I always screw it up. I always… hurt the people I really care about. So maybe… Maybe it was stupid. Maybe it was the wrong choice. But… maybe it’ll save you in the long run, from all the pain that comes with loving me.” He clenches his teeth, staring down at her. “I don’t know if that’s selfish, Bon. I don’t know if that makes me a coward. I just know that you are the last person I want to hurt, and it seems like that’s all I ever do.” 

He doesn’t know what to say after that, so he says nothing. He just clears his throat and stands from the table. He walks to the cart next to the fire and pours himself a drink. Drowning out his feelings seems like a good idea right about now. 

“You’re right. You’re an idiot.” 

Damon freezes, heart jumping up his throat, and then he turns around, and sees Bonnie staring back at him, very much awake. Forcing a smile, he raises a glass. “Drink? I have a feeling we’re going to need one… or six.” 

She doesn’t move or answer, just stares. And he wonders if this is a crossroads for her. She can get up, leave, never speak to him again. She can scream and yell and blow his brain up with aneurysms, and still decide she wants nothing to do with him. Or… 

“Is that your good bourbon?” 

Relief spreads through him. He smirks, but it’s shaky. “Only the best for you, Bon-Bon.” 

She holds a hand out, and he passes her his glass; an Olive branch, a beginning, a chance. 

And now I would like to request a Bamon military fanfic. Think about…

Damon getting ready to off and Bonnie’s in college with Caroline. They’re relationship is hard sometimes, Damon would be worried about Bonnie meeting someone else. And Bonnie would be afraid for him. They’d be angsty and romantic. Kissing upon his return.

title: you know I will adore you (‘til eternity) category: the vampire diaries ship: damon/bonnie faceclaims: C A S T music: ’no one’ - alicia keys word count: 11,051 summary: “Run all you want, but it won’t change anything, Bonnie. It doesn’t matter what world we’re in, you’ll always be my wife.” After being sucked up into what they assumed would be oblivion, Damon and Bonnie soon find themselves in an idyllic little town where they’re free to find peace. Which is exactly what they have for fifteen years, until reality comes calling to bring them home.

preview: 

“What were you looking at?” Bonnie wondered, peeking around him.

“Myself. Do I have anything in my teeth?” He bared his teeth and leaned toward her.

Bonnie snorted, and covered his face with her hand, shoving him away playfully.

He grinned, and together they started down the sidewalk, with Bonnie telling him what she picked up for dessert. Damon glanced back over his shoulder, just once, at the jewelry store, and the engagement rings that seemed to glitter under the display lights

title: you know I will adore you (‘til eternity) category: the vampire diaries genre: friendship/romance/drama/humor ship: damon/bonnie chapter rating: teen/pg-13 overall rating: explicit/nc-17 faceclaims: C A S T music: ‘rather be’ - seinabo sey word count: 9,761 summary: “Run all you want, but it won’t change anything, Bonnie. It doesn’t matter what world we’re in, you’ll always be my wife.” After being sucked up into what they assumed would be oblivion, Damon and Bonnie soon find themselves in an idyllic little town where they’re free to find peace. Which is exactly what they have for fifteen years, until reality comes calling to bring them home.