take the long way home

I think it’s cute that thing humans do when they see a boat pass and the people on the boat wave at them and they wave back. For absolutely no reason. They don’t know each other they’re not trying to communicate anything other than “LOOK! I am on a boat!!! Hello!!!!” “I see you!!!! On the boat!!!! Hello!!!!!!!!!!” in a genuine moment of wholesome human connection and excitement.

@seagles

Apparently for dudes who’ve got a compulsive need to be the smartest person in the room, “someone who’s wrong in a really stupid way who has unshakable confidence that they’re smarter than you” is their kryptonite. You can play dumb on almost any subject and their ego, their staunch belief that the masses are so far below them, will blind them to the fact that you’re just fucking with them, and as long as you don’t admit you’re fucking with them or acknowledge that there’s anything Off about what you’re saying, they won’t be able to stop themselves trying to get you to Respect Their Authority, and they won’t be able to see that will literally never happen. 

this is objectively the best kind of trolling and it always brings me joy, please send me all your examples

*sees moon* *remembers outer space* nice

they should have done the live action lion king with actors instead of cgi lions…but i guess lions can’t really act so might as well just make them people. and why not put them in denmark just to spice things up, in the middle ages too. i dont think anyones done that before

I had no idea that chickens could?? float?? or swim??? I don’t know why I’ve never thought of chickens as buoyant. I never picture chickens anywhere near water. what else have I been missing

C'est les swimming poules

Reblogging for the pun and the pun alone