Moodboards & Pride Flags

because of that it makes me feel like I’m going to be lonely forever bc hardly anyone out there wants a queerplatonic partner that they have sex with. Like online or in real life. It’s either romantic+sexual or queerplatonic+nonsexual or emotionally distant friends. That seems to be the only options. Which means either forgoing relationships completely or squishing down the parts of myself that want something else. Either way, I’ll forever be unsatisfied. Because most people don’t prioritize relationships that aren’t romantic, most people don’t put effort into nonromantic relationships. Even if the relationship is sexual, most people don’t actually care about the friendship part unless it’s romantic, unless the opportunity is there to enmesh your lives together. I only want one domestic partner. It’s too much work and I rather like being alone; I like having a quiet house. It’s so hard to find people who actually take relationship anarchy seriously. And among those people, so few of them are people I’d actually vibe with. 

I made this quick info post about using no pronouns bc there’s not a lot of resources on it! Reblogs appreciated :D

[Image ID: Simple blue and white graphic. First slide is titled “Guide to Using No Pronouns” and has a figure waving with a speech bubble that says “Hi, I’m Bee! I prefer using my name in place of pronouns.” The second slide is titled “Reasons to use No Pronouns” and the bullet points read “When no pronouns seem to fit. Sometimes you just don’t vibe with any of them! Avoids misgendering someone who’s not out yet. For fun!” An additional bubble reads “you don’t have to have a reason!” The third slide is titled “Introductions” and reads “Introducing yourself: “Hello, my name is ____. I use my name instead of pronouns.” or “My name is ____. I don’t use pronouns.” Introducing someone else: “This is ____. ____ doesn’t use pronouns.” or “This is ____. You can use ____’s name in place of pronouns.” I find that stating that you use your name in place of pronouns makes your introduction more clear. I would also include a quick example of how to use your name: “So instead of using they/them/their, you can say “Bee is calling Bee’s parents.”““ The fourth slide is titled “Examples” and reads “Here’s some examples using my name! Instead of: “Bee is working by themself.” Do: “Bee is working alone.” Instead of: “They are proud of their work.” Do: “Bee is proud of Bee’s work.” Instead of “I went with them and they were amazing!” Do: “I went with Bee and Bee was amazing!”“ The fifth slide reads “Thank you for reading! Have a good day!”]

Quick FAQ/additional notes under cut:

medical neglect is something that affects intersex people as a whole on a massive scale, and that neglect often starts when the parents of intersex children do not care for said children.

this sort of neglect can look like:

-not having access to health records, which for us especially could help us put pieces together to better understand and help ourselves... because they don't exist. because nobody ever took you to the doctor.

-not knowing what's going on with you when you're young, just that your body looks different- and possibly is even in physical pain.

-not knowing how to talk to doctors, because nobody ever taught you. because if you ever went at all, all your decisions about your body were made for you.

-being scared to go to the doctors, even when you really need to, because you can't afford it and you wouldn't know how to advocate for yourself anyways.

-getting trampled over when you do try to advocate for yourself.

the list goes on. this is only a few examples.

to every intersex person who grew up without healthcare, to every intersex person who still can not access healthcare as an adult. to every intersex person who tries to be an advocate for themself, tries to access healthcare, and is denied. im sorry. im with you, i feel that pain.

dyadic people, please keep us in mind today. maybe use your resources to help intersex people access the things we need. we need as many people in our corner as possible.

Hi! So I don’t know if anyone has done one of these yet, but I thought it could be fun to do one of the “days of” Tumblr posts for the 7 days of Asexuality Awareness Week!

So how these work is you’re given something to reblog this with, each day out of 7 days. The idea is that by the end of the week, you’ve told the community all about you and your identity!

So I’m gonna try my best to make one of these for the next 7 days, wish me luck!

Day 1

Tell us about your favourite part of the Ace community on Tumblr! Is it the culture-is blogs, the microlabel rep, or something else?

Day 2

What’s your favourite Ace representation in media? This can be a book, a movie with an ace character, or even a work of poetry! (I know there’s going to be at least one Alice Oseman book in here)

Day 3

Find a photo themed around your favourite colour from the Ace flag and attach it to your post!

Day 4

If you could tell all non-ace people in the world one thing about life being asexual, what would you say? Don’t be afraid to speak your mind.

Day 5

What’s your favourite asexual-sounding song? This doesn’t have to be broadly ace - this can be individual to your own experience. And if you don’t know any, ask your followers for help!

Day 6

What’s the most ace thought you’ve ever had? (I feel like these could have the potential to be really funny, please don’t let me down)

Day 7

What’s your one message to aseuxal people all around the world on the last day of Ace Week?

Thank you so much for reading (and hopefully taking part!). Just a reminder - every single asexual person about there is valid. Y’all are so valid, incredible, and definitely not broken. Ace rep is beyond the last week of October - it’s 24/7/30/365. I love everyone in the community so much. 💜💜

Also - shameless boost. Hoping I can spread this post around!

@ace-thinks @ace-culture-is @asexual-society @asexual-memes @asexualawarenessweek @redbeardace @aro-culture-is @aro-and-ace-stuff @nebula-culture-is @actuallyasexual @tooaceforthisspace @fuckyeahasexual

I love how diverse the ace-spec community on tumblr is, and how accepting it is. I know that there are subcommunities that may not be as open, but the a-spec tumblr circles that I've been in for the past few years have been very welcoming to people.

I love how ace-spec tumblr is often circulating info about experiences all along the spectrum and spreading the word about the gray areas of asexuality. I love how the fact that asexuality can vary a lot from individual to individual is often at the forefront of our discussions.

I’ve personally barely seen any ace representation in media, so I don’t really have a lot to choose from. Here are all of the canonically ace characters that I’ve seen: Todd from Bojack Horseman, Sir Fitzroy Maplecourt from The Adventure Zone: Graduation, Chloe Turner from The Bright Sessions, Zeph Hernandez from The Elementalists on Choices.

There is one more ace character, who is my favorite ace rep: Jon Sims from The Magnus Archives. I like this representation of asexuality because I feel like it was handled well and realistically. I also like that Jon canonically does not have sex. In addition to that, he has canonically had at least romantic 2 partners who knew and respected this about him.

Here’s a moodboard I made of pictures I edited a few years ago with a gray ace theme that heavily features purple:

(Image description 1: a white background with a purple and green border, along the top of the image is text that says "My pronouns are:", below that are the words "Required not preferred", along the bottom of the image is the words "International Pronouns Day".)

I've been feeling extremely lost, and desperately trying to reconcile my faith with my sexuality and also the fact that I, as a black Christian aro lesbian, am practically excluded from damn near every community I'm part of, which sucks ass.

Everyone in my life has this warped image of me being this good Christian girl™, while me being queer (but being alloaro in particular) defies literally every part of my religion. At least that's what I thought.

So having no one to confide in, out of extreme confusion and desperation, I reached out to other queer Christians online, basically asking for help.

Honestly, I thought they were going to cuss me out for being "promiscuous", "immoral", or even accuse me of being a predator for experiencing sexual attraction without romantic attraction, you name it.

But I was met with so much kindness, sympathy and understanding, I could cry (nearly did).

Even the ones who weren't aspec (!) were quick to point out the false bias I had of romantic love and sexuality being inherently tied, and the notion of romantic love being the highest form of love.

They told me that being aromantic and lesbian were parts of me, and that despite the harmful ideas put in place by this allo-heteronormative society, that if my morals and intentions-- just as a human being, period-- were good, that I could happily and vibrantly trangress those boundaries.

I don't know, but after hearing all of that, despite all other parts of my life practically going to shit, that itself gave me so much hope. Might just fuck around and come out now lol.

Jokes aside, if anyone happens to read this; there are most definitely people out there that'll support you wholeheartedly, no matter what, I promise.

You guys might be strangers to me, but you're literally one of the few people I trust.

We're allowed to be frustrated about our lack of representation, even if other identities also experience this issue.

We're allowed to be angry about how we're treated by exclusionists and others in the queer community who belittle our identities and treat us like invaders in our own spaces.

We're allowed to be ashamed, saddened, or disappointed by our identities and the conflict they create in our lives (though hopefully we overcome that one day).

We're allowed to be LOUD, to take up space, to be vocal about who we are and what we deserve.

There’s quite a bit of overlap, but our struggles aren’t all inherently the same, and it’s disingenuous to both groups to imply that our struggles are absolutely the same. Our interests are hand in hand, like the interests of intersex people and disabled people. 

Cis intersex people still wield transphobia and transmisogyny. There are cis intersex TERFs that co-op intersex activism for their own transmisogyny and trans-extermination. 

Dyadic trans people still wield intersexism. These thoughts that you can transition to intersex/get “intersex genitalia”, that we are “lucky” to face medical abuse and neglect if we’re intersex and trans because we got a “jump start”, these are lateral aggressors between the trans and intersex community. 

But again, there is overlap. Trans intersex people are here and we experience both extremes, plus that overlap between the communities. We all strive for liberation from sex as a binary and a class. 

I think it’s important for us to acknowledge and create the solidarity between our communities while realizing that we have similar and differing goals. An example being HRT. Going on HRT for your wellbeing as a trans person isn’t the same as being forced on HRT as an intersex person. Our medical abuse and neglect look different. And that’s okay! 

Hi! So I don’t know if anyone has done one of these yet, but I thought it could be fun to do one of the “days of” Tumblr posts for the 7 days of Asexuality Awareness Week!

So how these work is you’re given something to reblog this with, each day out of 7 days. The idea is that by the end of the week, you’ve told the community all about you and your identity!

So I’m gonna try my best to make one of these for the next 7 days, wish me luck!

Day 1

Tell us about your favourite part of the Ace community on Tumblr! Is it the culture-is blogs, the microlabel rep, or something else?

Day 2

What’s your favourite Ace representation in media? This can be a book, a movie with an ace character, or even a work of poetry! (I know there’s going to be at least one Alice Oseman book in here)

Day 3

Find a photo themed around your favourite colour from the Ace flag and attach it to your post!

Day 4

If you could tell all non-ace people in the world one thing about life being asexual, what would you say? Don’t be afraid to speak your mind.

Day 5

What’s your favourite asexual-sounding song? This doesn’t have to be broadly ace - this can be individual to your own experience. And if you don’t know any, ask your followers for help!

Day 6

What’s the most ace thought you’ve ever had? (I feel like these could have the potential to be really funny, please don’t let me down)

Day 7

What’s your one message to aseuxal people all around the world on the last day of Ace Week?

Thank you so much for reading (and hopefully taking part!). Just a reminder - every single asexual person about there is valid. Y’all are so valid, incredible, and definitely not broken. Ace rep is beyond the last week of October - it’s 24/7/30/365. I love everyone in the community so much. 💜💜

Also - shameless boost. Hoping I can spread this post around!

@ace-thinks @ace-culture-is @asexual-society @asexual-memes @asexualawarenessweek @redbeardace @aro-culture-is @aro-and-ace-stuff @nebula-culture-is @actuallyasexual @tooaceforthisspace @fuckyeahasexual

I love how diverse the ace-spec community on tumblr is, and how accepting it is. I know that there are subcommunities that may not be as open, but the a-spec tumblr circles that I've been in for the past few years have been very welcoming to people.

I love how ace-spec tumblr is often circulating info about experiences all along the spectrum and spreading the word about the gray areas of asexuality. I love how the fact that asexuality can vary a lot from individual to individual is often at the forefront of our discussions.

I’ve personally barely seen any ace representation in media, so I don’t really have a lot to choose from. Here are all of the canonically ace characters that I’ve seen: Todd from Bojack Horseman, Sir Fitzroy Maplecourt from The Adventure Zone: Graduation, Chloe Turner from The Bright Sessions, Zeph Hernandez from The Elementalists on Choices.

There is one more ace character, who is my favorite ace rep: Jon Sims from The Magnus Archives. I like this representation of asexuality because I feel like it was handled well and realistically. I also like that Jon canonically does not have sex. In addition to that, he has canonically had at least romantic 2 partners who knew and respected this about him.