Awwsomeness

Write less

You can

Probably

Guess where

That's from

You can't?

Me neither

I just thought

Of it

I don't know

Why

Maybe it's

Me screaming

Inside?

Wanting some

Help but

Already asking

Only to never

Receive

So many needs

So many wants

So many pleads

I can't deal

With me

Why won't you

Help me

When you can't

Deal with me

Either

So poor

And broke

Deadbeatish

Mom?

I don't know

Dad is dead

Stuck in my

Head

A week away

From a year

I say

It's been

A bad one

Just need

Some help

I can't deal

With myself

For much

Longer

Rope around

My neck

I've already

Blundered

A boulder

Up a mountain

Keeps tumbling

Down

It never

Reaches the

Top

Help me figure

Out how

To blow my

Brains out

I'm sorry

That I'm not

Okay

I prayed for

Another way

Every day

But you no

Longer listen

To what I

Have to say

I just need help

Something to

Make it all

Go away

Death is the

Only option

That seems

Possible these

Days

Who you

Shall become

You stand there

Watching

Inspecting

Staring

Glaring

Thinking

About what

You are seeing

Who is this

Being in this

Reflection

Why must they

Stand like that

Glare like that

Stare like that

Watch like that

Think like that

Why not be

Someone else

Why this

Why is this

Who you are

Why

Can anyone

Answer

The answer is

No

No one can

Answer

You aren't ever

The same person

You are always

Changing

Though not

Who you will

Be

You shall become

Everything

In between

And never stop

You will change

Forever

Don't assume

You know

Who is staring

Back at you

Don't ever assume

You will always

Be wrong

You don't know

Who you are

Or who you

Will become

Or who you

Won't become

You are whoever

You are and

You don't need

To understand it

Just think about

It

You will learn

You will know

You will think

You will forget

You will do

It all

Everyday

Every hour

Every minute

Every second

All the time

Everywhere

It's terrifying

And maybe

Just not true

I am just

Speaking from

Experience

Because I don't

Know who I am

Anymore

I don't know

Anything about

Myself anymore

I'm always

Changing

Forgetting

Not understanding

Hating

And just wanting

To be nothing

I want to

Disappear

I want to die

Life sucks

And I don't

Know who I

Am anymore

I try to find

People who

Understand

But I don't

Remember why

I want someone

To understand

I don't remember

How I thought

That would help

Nothing ever helps

I'm trapped

In this body

In this realm

In this reality

I don't want

To wake up

I want it to

Consume me

Until I go

Crazy and

Am never

Expected to

Try and

Comprehend

Anything

Ever

Again

From: Me

I don't know

Why we speak

As the wind

Crashes into

The trees

Rain splattering

All over the

Leaves

We don't even

Truly speak

Not like the

Wind or the

Trees

Or the rain

Nor the leaves

We whisper

So quietly

Hushed tones

Come out

Muffled in the

Shadow of the

Branches

Of the light

From the moon

Gliding through

The window

Of the lightning

Of the sunshine

The thunder

The rainbow

The chirping birds

Fluttering creatures

Climbing squirrels

Blooming flowers

Growing grass

Feet pattering

We speak so

Silently

So boring

Not from the

Heart but

From the air

We talk like

People

Rather than

Like nature

Nature is

Forever

It will never

Be stopped

We speak so

Quietly and

Leave so quickly

We don't act

Like we'll be

Here forever

We change

We blossom

We bloom

We shine

Only because

We have such

Limited minds

On an island

In the sea

Can't escape

Without a

Boat but no

One will hear

From me

Peace and

Quiet is

Sometimes

All we need

Just a little

Break from

Society and

You might

Finally feel

Free

No more

Pressure

About what

To say

Or being told

To look a

Certain way

You can be

However you

Want to

There's nobody

Left to tell

You not to

You can dance

Until you die

Or perhaps

Just lie there

Waiting for

Your time

You won't know

When it's

Your birthday

But who cares

When you

Finally feel

Okay

Again

Older than

You truly are?

How are you

Meant to

Communicate

Who you are

And who you

Truly want to

Be?

How are you

Meant to

Make sense

To others

When you

Can not

Truly make

Sense to

Yourself?

Can you

Understand

Yourself?

Can you know

What you mean

When you try

To say it?

Do you know

What you

Mean when

You try to

Say it?

I haven't a

Clue whatever

I am saying

But sometimes

People still

Understand it.

People may

Know what

You mean

But when

You're so

Messed up

That you

Don't know

What you're

Talking about

Anymore

Then who

Are you trying

To make

Understand?

Yourself or

Them?

And who are

You talking to?

Yourself or

Them?

It's my 2 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

Cool.

Cry for you

I want to

Miss you

More

Like I used

To

But as more

Time passes

I continue

To realize

That I

Never really

Knew you

Not your

Favorite color

Or song

Unknown to

Me what you

Did all that

Time you

Were gone

How you

Spoke or

How you

Sang

How much

You truly

Knew and

If you even

Cared to

Think about

Me every day

I wish

I knew

Who I'm

Trying to

Miss

I wish

I could

Say that

I remember

You like

It was

Yesterday

When we

Last spoke

But your

Voice is

Muffled

And your

Embrace

I can not

Recall

More and

More days

Pass

Since your

Death

And I fear

That our

Memories

Will not

Last until

The end

A year

Gone by

Creeps up

Haunting

Me with

All it's

Might

Constantly

Reminding

Me of your

Neverending

Trail of

Broken

Promises

That you

Left behind

When you

Died

Pretty

People

And that

Is a fact

I would

Not even

Mind if the

Skin on

Their

Backs'

Were to

Crack

And crumble

Burn and

Fall

Die and

Tumble

Like rolling

Stone rocks

Down a

Mountain

I would

Love to

Watch

The beauty

Fall from

Their bones

But even

Underneath

They'll still

Be beautiful

To me

And I hate

It

I hate

Pretty

People

Not because

Of their

Personalities

Nor by

Fault of

Their

Opinions

But only

Because

They are

So captivating

That I

Never want

To look

Away

Heavy

Let yourself

Bleed

Let the blood

Pour out

Of your

Body

Let the words

Flow through

Your mouth

Or pen(cil)

Or finger(s)

Let art

Burst out

Of you

And onto

Whatever is

Near

Do as you

Please

When you

Feel heavy

Because a

Person in

The same

State would

Decide to

Do the same

Never be

Another

Who will

Love and

Hate you

Truly

As much

As you

Yourself

Do

I mean

We are

All so

In love

With

Ourselves

Hence

Why we

Still have

Something

To love

And if you

Give love

Then hate

Must come

And equal

It all out

Newton and

His laws

Or whatever

How can

One stand

In a mirror

Or sit

And stare

Into a mirror

Or any

Other

Reflective

Enough

Surface

And say

That they

Truly love

What they

See

With other

People

It can

Be hard

To find

Fault in

Them

Everything

You see

You love

You may

Not like

How their

Hair is

Cut

Or perhaps

How large

Or small

They are

Or how

They always

Make that

One odd

Face when

They're

Doing

Something

But if you

Truly love

That person

Then you

End up

Loving

What you

Hate

Their haircut

Will become

Their signature

And their

Occasional

But often

Occurring

Odd face

Will end

Up being

"That one

Weird but

Cute thing"

That they

Do

Things change

And opinions

Do too

But if you

Think for a

Moment

That you

Can never

Love what

You hate

Or hate

What you

Love then

You are

Very likely

Mistaken

An individual

Can see

The beauty

In the ugly

Things that

Another may

Do but

When staring

At a face

Only sometimes

Recognized

In a mirror

They will

Often only

See what

They may

Know to

Be is in

Front of

Them

Always

Reminding

Always

Remembering

Even when

Actually not

Always knowing

That is what

The mind

Does

An individual's

Mind may

Not always

Remember

But when

It comes

To knowing

That individual's

Mind will

Scream and

Scream and

Scream

All words

Of complaint

And hate

There will

Be no

"Nice hair"

Or

"Pretty face"

Or

"Perfect body"

There is

Only

Screams

Of terror

"Is that what

You look like"

"Is that what

I look like"

Everything that

Could possibly

Ever be wrong

Is wrong

To that

Individual's mind

When they

Gaze upon

A mirror

Nothing can

Look right

Nothing can

Feel right

Because when

One assumes

To be staring

At themself

Only to find

Whatever piece

Of junk that

Is staring back

At them

Their mind

Will obviously

Go bonkers

One is

Allowed

To hate

Themself

They are

Allowed

To not

Like what

They see

In a mirror

One is

Also

Allowed

To walk

Past mirrors

And even

When forced

To face

Their face

They are

Allowed

To not

Like what

They see

Is that person

Over there

Who does

Not like

The skin on

Their arms

Or the hair

Or lack thereof

On their head

Or the teeth

In their mouth

Or the lips

That keep their

Mouth closed

Doing anything

Wrong to you

If they are

Then I advise

You to get

Some assistance

With whatever

Bother they

Are causing

But if they

Are not

Then who

Is it doing

Any harm to

Why is that

Individual not

Allowed to

Hate and

Loathe

Themself

Like everybody

Else

Or more so

Why is that

Individual not

Allowed to

Voice their

Opinions

About their

Own self

Rather than

Just keeping

It to themself

As most

Everyone else

Does

Why is it

So taboo

To not like

How one

Looks

I believe

That it

Makes

Other

People

Cringe

Or feel

Called out

At the

Voicings

Of hate

That they

Also feel

For themselves

Perhaps

They feel

As though

Their mind

Is bleeding

Onto the floor

For everyone

To see

And perhaps

They feel

Embarassed

By that

So everybody

Else follows

Along as well

Society tells

Us-

Yeah

No

You tell you

You tell them

An individual

Must be able

To hate

Themself

It is a rite of

Passage for

Some and

A way of life

For others

But don't

Try to help

Someone to

Not hate

Themself

If you hate

Yourself the

Same way

Or part

As they do

This could

Be a nice

Place to

End

But let's

Dive into

Love a bit

More as I

Do not believe

I had previously

Explained my

Thoughts

Thoroughly enough

An individual

Can love

Another's quirks

Deeply so

But that individual

Will be the

Only one

To love themself

As much as

They can be

Loved

Every day they

Continue to

Live is another

Day of loving

Themself

Because only

An individual can

Know the true

True

Truest

Thoughts that

Come to their

Mind

Only the individual

Can know what

The worst things

They have truly

Done are

And when they

Choose to

Continue to

Live then

They likely

See themself

As either

Better or

Equal to it

And if they

Can live with

That and

Whatever horrid

Thoughts remain

To circle their

Mind everyday

Then however

Could they

Not love

Themself

Though

Truly these

Words are

All dependent

On how

Others

Perceive them

And technically

Are unable to

Be correct

Or incorrect

Let paper

Cut your

Skin

When a

Blade is

Nearby

You don't

Watch

While

Another is

Being

Attacked

When

You're physically

By and

Able

And with

Such

Confidence

And bravery

To help

You don't

Live in

Reality

When you

Have the

Ability

And tools

To live

Where you

Please

Mentally

And especially

When you

Do not

Have the

Will to

Live in

Such a

Thing

That so

Many

Have

Proclaimed

As reality

Why must

You

Why must

I

Why must

Anybody

Be forced

To confine

Their mind

And live

In such

A horrid

Place

Why must

People

Be unable

To think

How they

Choose

To

Why must

Everything

Be thought

To be so

Dangerous

Or bad

Or unhealthy

By others

When the

Only way

That some

Are truly

Able to

Feel alive

Is by use

Of some

Instruments

And tools

That are

Considered

To be

Dangerous

Or bad

Or unhealthy

I shall

Continue

To ask

And ask

And ask

But no

Answer

Will ever

Come

Calling

I shall

Continue

To wonder

And wonder

And wonder

Why people

Need not

Be allowed

To live

These things

Called

"Lives"

How they

Please

Rather than

Confining

Themselves

To such

Pitiful breathing

I shall

Continue

To think

And think

And think

As I please

To do so

Whether

That is

Welcomed

Or not

To truly

Understand

Is to

Remember

That you

Do not

Know

Does it matter?

Dead

Inside

Do you

Need to

Hide

Just to

Finally

Try

When you

Want to

Die

Mentally

I'm dead

Physically

I'm alive

My body

Is

Working

Fine but

I only

Think to

Ask why

Right now

I am

Actually

Sick

A common

Cold

Or some

Other

Shit

That'll

Pass

And I'm

Also on

My period

So the

Red demon

Is here

And so are

My internal

Ones

And none

Are alone

They're a

Whole trio

Sitting on

Their

Thrones

No remorse

No regrets

They let me

Rest

Occasionally

But I

Digress

I'm dead

On the

Inside

Outside

I'm dying

My blood

Is leaving

My body

And my

Mental

State is

Really

Declining

Hardships

For us

All

I guess

It's not a

Test

Just to

Let you

Know

That's just

How life

Is and it

Is horrible

I hate it

I don't feel

Right

Nothing

Feels right

The whole

World is

Just

Existing

Barely doing

That

I hate

Feeling

Like this

But this

Feeling

This eternal

Wrongness

Always

Seems to

Come back

I don't feel

Alive

Nothing

Feels alive

Nothing feels

Alright or

Normal

It's all

Wrong

Wrong

Wrong

Wrong

Wrong

Wrong

Look and

You will

See

There are

People

Waiting

For me

I'm trying

To stand

Tall

So that

They don't

Know

I'll stand

Tall for

Forty years

Or so

Can't let

Them see

That I'm

Falling

Down

Can't let

Them see

That I'm

Crawling

Through

Can't let

Them see

That those

People

Waiting

For me

Are

Depending

On me

Expecting

Me to

Do

To do

Um

I don't

Know

I'm standing

Tall but

What is

It that

You want

From me

I'm standing

Tall but

I don't

Understand

Why I have

To plead

My case

I'm trying

To stand

Tall but

I only ever

Seem to

Fall

I'm still

Trying

To stand

Tall but

I really

Need to

Fall

I'm sorry

I can't stand

Tall

I know

It was

Important

To you

I haven't

A clue

As to

What me

Standing

Tall had

To do

With you

But I

Tried to

Stand tall

I really

Tried to

Stand tall

But the

Only thing

To trust

Is the

Fall

I swear

I tried

To stand

Tall but

I fell

Before

It all

Thank you to everyone who got me to 100 likes!

Yayyyyyy!

Is it the fact that I rarely use punctuation?

You tell me because I can't tell you.

Nor can I say if my thoughts are ever true.

True to my soul they may be, but not typically things

That are whispered in the trees.

Lovely is what I know them to seem,

But that's only to me and I haven't a clue what anyone else thinks.

My words are scarcely liked and that is okay,

But I still find myself to wonder if it is due to

What they are saying, how they are said, how people read them,

How people understand them, or if it's just how they are placed.

I haven't a clue what to say when my heart is not stated.

My mind will continue. It races and it races.

No need to hurry or feel bad not to read.

I'd simply like to inquire as to why there's such a scarcity.