Ambiguous

I have been attracted to songs like Cherry by Harry Styles and Walking in the Wind by One Direction without realizing its meanings, but as I scrolled through tumblr and twitter, finding the head canons and actual meaning of the song made me realize that my brain can pick up songs that have deeper meanings which I can relate to without even realizing it.

It's amazing how the mind works. I'm not just attracted with the melody, but the vibe and lyrics. I'm not that type of person that would dig deep with the song I'm listening to. If I vibe, I vibe.

I always viewed myself as a shallow minded person, but wow, my mind says otherwise. I can pick up a good song, even without fully realizing its meaning, but when I listen to it, it's as if my emotion amplifies. The song explains what I feel without realizing it.

This 11s vid of 1d from the AMAs is hilarious. Harry was being goofy and apologizes right after he made his biggest OIIII noise he made and looked confused and disrespected when Liam made the pun/joke.

Niall was, as usual, laughing and weirded out by Harry's goofiness.

Louis looked amused when Harry copied his OI OI thing and disgusted when he heard Liam's joke

And Liam, as per usual, after he looked at Harry, he continued with his message because he's the only sane person and proud of his joke.

Niall, Louis, and Liam were all syncronised when they heard Harry making a weird sound. They turned their heads simultaneously, which is almost the only thing they at the right time as a group.

This made me cry so hard. I miss him. Please don't hurt this baby. They've been through a lot. Stop stalking him or coming to his home. He's a human being too; and he just wants to feel safe in his own home. I know you idolize him, but stalking him everywhere, making him travel a lot is too much.

I started last night, waiting for updates, news, activities, and bombs that they would drop in the middle of the night. I had been on the lookout for almost 24 hours, or more, i don't know, i'm not sure.

To see the One Direction account tweet after over 2 years made me ecstatic. But seeing Liam tweet, as the first member to tweet made me realize that the fandom is truly lucky to have him as the Dad, the responsible one in the group. He always provides us updates and news, him and Louis. Now, Louis tweeted, just tonight, not 10 minutes ago, he tweeted things, many things that made my heart flutter and throb. It made me feel relieved that he always thinks about us and the boys, but the pain that it follows is beyond compare. I mean, many fans mentioned this before. Niall, Louis, and Liam are obviously eager to be together again, to have a comeback again, but we all know that Zayn won't be back, and Harry's head is in someplace else.

Don't get me wrong. Watching Harry grow and be happy is such a relief to us. Before, he was one of the members that is very conscious as to what would other people say, and now he's thriving in his solo career. It makes my heart flutter and ache. I don't know how to feel. It's ridiculous to think that these five boys would still affect my life in such a macro level that I didn't even saw coming when I joined this fandom. I guess their bond and the things that they've done for us are the reasons why we love them so much. I want a comeback, I really do. Because I'm old enough to watch them live and perhaps be responsible enough, and yet I want their well being, I want them to be happy and to be okay.

As of now, Liam and Louis are the ones who tweeted about the anniversary. We're still waiting for Niall, Harry, and Zayn. I know they'll come around. I love you, boys. You have become such a huge part of my life. I can't thank you enough.

Here's Niall with his appreciation. To be frank, I was expecting him to be vocal in twitter, but hw only tweeted replies to Liam and Louis' tweets. Then I opened instagram, there he goes, pouring his thoughts to his lads, and at the same time tagging our baby Zayn. I want to cry so many had happened today.

Niall even used the hashtag. I stand corrected. They are too precious. ♥️

Now that I'm alone in my room, Harry's post on instagram and his tweet, although with the same content, made me sob like a baby. I never realized how this band, these boys changed my life. It's beem so long since I felt this, and I felt like myself again. I'm so happy. For years, I'm happy.

The thing I remembered the most is that when Steal My Girl came out. Some fans leaked it on twitter hours before the boys would release it on midnight back in 2014.

It was a Sunday in our country and I was in my laptop, of course on twitter, watching and joining everyone else as we gush about the new single. I cried when I heard the first single from the new album, FOUR. New content, new era, new interviews, new tour dates, new experiences and tears.

I started stanning them back when I heard Rock Me and They Don't Know About us on the same day, when my classmate sent me the audio. I started to see posters of them, but I didn't try to look them up on youtube. Which I regret the most. The take me home era and tour was, for me, one direction's glory days, and I let it slip by. I loved the next album, Midnight Memories, almost instantly. I started watching their music videos, loving Best Song Ever and Midnight Memories most of all. I remembered crying when I saw the music video of You & I. It felt magical and complete.

Tour dates was then announced for the next tour, On The Road Again, OTRA, my country was included in the tour dates and route, but a video lf Zayn and Louis surfaced in the news causing mass hysteria. The government of our country nearly refused the visit from my favorite band, the band who saved me from my nightly breakdowns and traumas. They were later on allowed to perform. I wasn't able to come to the concert since I didn't quite have the financial means and my mother would preferably use it for our daily expenses, which was understandable. I celebrated with them in the comforts of my home, tweeting nonstop about the updates that I see whenever I refresh my Twitter timeline.

I remembered the clips of 1D day trending on youtube and twitter, the one they did on Talk Dirty to Me and everything else.

I remembered the release of One Way or Another music video and their promotional videos for the red nose day made me love them even more. They are humble boys that never forgot about the reason why they became powerful people, among the youth. They inspired many to be better, to be generous and empathetic.

They never deserved the hate that they received during their 1D days, no differ to today. They are wonderful boys that saved millions through their songs, kindness, and generosity. I hope them all the best.

I'm saying this all in advance for their 10th Year Anniversary, since I felt like writing about them today.

Having a 1D reunion or not on the anniversary doesn't really matter for me. What really matters is their physical and mental well-beings. If they're thinking about a reunion, I hope the management would improve their work schedule, give them enough space for themselves and their family in order for them to really know what it feels like to live, not just to survive.

Happy Anniversary boys. I want you all to know that we all love you. You are all the best and will always be there for you no matter what happens in this upcoming anniversary.

To Sofia,