the autixel radio show

you can just take it from their cart. its not their possession if they haven't bought it yet

if i were thrift shopping and you put your hands into my cart to take a unique handpicked item i was intending to purchase i would break your legs

me, quietly whispering to the ao3 page of an author who doesn’t even know I exist: I am obsessed with you

me, whispering to the ao3 page of an author who hasn’t updated anything in four years: I think about you often and I hope you’re alright

me, whispering to the ao3 page of an author who wrote one life altering banger and nothing else: I hope your pillow is cool and your skin is clear and you find money in a forgotten jeans pocket

me, whispering to every single person on this post: please leave one singular comment saying literally any of that

Fuck your dream job what’s your dream hobby that you don’t have the means to take up yet. Mine are falconry and aerial acrobatics

"can mutuals dm" "can mutuals ask for your discord" girl, mutuals have an implied invitation to my wedding

Happy pride month to the tiny cowboy and tiny Trojan man from Night at the Museum

happy pride month 2021 I ain’t quittin’ you…

when i was at walgreens (at 3 in the morning which explains all of this) the cashier was talking to her coworker about how shed rather be a werewolf than a vampire because vampires are condemned to hell but werewolves arent and then she asked me what i thought and i said vampire because im already condemned to hell and she said in the nicest tone of voice “i dont think anybody is condemned to hell….” paused, stared at me for a few moments, and added on “…not even gay people” 

Happy pride month to the filthiest most brutal read I’ve ever been given in my life

inshallah he will be drank

There's wholesome ships and there's toxic ships, but I'd like to coin 'sodium chloride ships', where the individuals involved are both horrible and dangerous people, but somehow being together renders them surprisingly well-adjusted (if a little salty).

The opposite of this is a 'coke and mentos' dynamic, where the two people are generally chill and likeable but being around each other makes them both wild and chaotic.

both of them are me