Kai’s Thoughts And Feelings

Having to come off my chemo for more dental work when it’s this humid should be a crime.

Nervous about the huge shift in weather pattern happening the day my youngest turns 13. I want to be able to enjoy the party she planned. Her lesbian autistic ass planned a Hamilton party. Even had me sew her a new skirt with a purple tulle layer to go with a top she already had. Planned a Covid safe outdoor party then a polycule watch party. And it’s gearing up to be a cane - if not bed day for me and I’m doing everything in my power to have it not. Heating pads today tons of stretching on and off. All my emergency meds as soon as the pains get to a five. Just need another 40 hours then I can collapse in bed until I feel better.

Way too fucking hot for disability.

Happy Pride!!! The whole polycule is queer AF, even both kids have come out. I love that we are a safe place not just for LGBTQIA+ but also disabled folks. Everyone is quarantined or masking for the youngest 13th birthday in the next few days. (Granted we all mask full time anyway but the extra guests are doing this for us too) Finished my steroids this morning and am feeling a little better. Was able to do most of my morning routine without wheezing and shit finally today so progress I guess.

Woke up wheezing again. Not surprising given the amount of pollen in the air yesterday and I couldn’t escape it having to go to the doctor. At least I’m still taking meds from my primary so I’m not going to the ER but I wish it wasn’t so bad to just fucking breathe.

Drs offices that have the elevators all the way in the back and not so much hand railing on the walls are so fucking stupid. So glad I brought my cane.

30 Solid minutes of stretching and I got basically no relief at all. Doing a breathing treatment today because my neighbors mowed their lawn and are now burning things. Both of which trigger my asthma more. But Paralives came out today so I will be playing my new game and enjoying myself at least a little.

Get to restart oral chemo Wednesday. I can't wait. Maybe I can get back into my routine in the next couple days. Hate getting like 1/3 of my normal daytime things done and just being completely drained. But even my full routine now is a fraction of what I was doing a few years ago.