this is a torch song

…

She knew that Aurora had a son, one that was a handful of years older than Harry had been.  And as frustrated as she was, she hadn’t completely lost herself.  She wouldn’t have approached if she had had her son with her.  But she was alone, and it was important enough to her that they had this conversation.  As time went on she was less and less certain of who she could trust, of who her friends could trust.  There was something so disingenuous about someone who was willing to live a comfortable life as a mid to higher code and go to bed feeling good about themselves because they slipped someone less off a handful of supplies.  It wasn’t that she wanted people like Aurora to become a code 5.  She simply wanted to ensure that they were trustworthy.  That they weren’t going to turn on them the moment things got hard like Peter had.

She led the way, gesturing for the woman to follow her.  She slid into the shop and sat on a bench, waiting for the waitress to take their order before speaking.  “You make me very nervous,” she admitted.  

**

She knew Mary a little bit. From years ago when she considered herself an actual member of the Order. There were so many kids there. Those barely out of Hogwarts themselves. Aurora was still technically playing for the Hollyhead Harpies, married and really, it broke her heart seeing teenagers there. Ready to die. Aurora knew that Mary was now a code five. A criminal. And anyone talking to her would also be assumed a criminal as well. They were no longer the teenagers from those early meetings. 

Amos and herself would have never pulled away if she hadn’t gotten pregnant. They had even talked to Arthur and Molly about the decision. They too had pulled away because of their family. The two families were rather close with Amos and Arthur being friends for the longest time and it didn’t take long for Molly and Aurora to get along.

The Diggorys still wanted to help and they could afford to be a little risky with their mid-tier code. People weren’t as focused on them as they were the code fours and fives.

As Aurora followed Mary into the shop, sitting beside her. Although when Mary spoke, saying that she was making Mary nervous, she did a little bit of a double take. “I do?” She asked, trying to figure out what exactly about her behavior could be making her nervous. “Why is that?”

It had been the first day that Daisy had absolutely nothing planned, something that felt an uncommon occurrence in the last months. Her days had often been filled with training and studying once outside of her shifts. She didn’t mind the new life, in fact she found the road to becoming a healer rather fulfilling, but it was a busy road nonetheless. After she’d visited with her parents she found herself at a loss of what to do next, she hadn’t needed to do any errands as those had been done yesterday, and all her friends seemed to be up to something weather it was work or something else. After mulling over her options for a minute Daisy decided on walking around the park not too far off from her parents house. 

The park had felt like it’d not changed much since the days she used to visit it as child, expect for the minor details to upkeep the park it was the same. The same amount of kids running and playing enjoy what little sun that was available in London. The same old people and bookish adults sitting at the benches. It was nice to be in a place that felt unchanged, though if she looked hard enough Daisy knew she’d see the effects of the war looming about. Though before she could get too deep into that depressing thought she was interrupted by a smiling little boy with a mop of brown curls on his head.

She’d just about bent down to his eye level to answer the questions he’d been posing when a woman came jogging up to retrieve the wandering child. Daisy pushed herself up, shaking her head at the apology. “ Oh, don’t worry about it I used to roam this park just the same. He’s just a little curious is all. “ She said with a smile assuring the mother that all was well. “ So, I suppose I should probably introduce myself that way Cedric wasn’t talking to a stranger, but a new friend. I’m Daisy, and you are?”

**

Losing Cedric had always been a fear of hers. That he’d disappear from her and that’d be the end of it. That it’d be punishment for something or her fault for putting him in danger. That the gods would be that cruel was not hard to believe. She had read muggle mythology stories growing up and most of them were a tragedy. And Aurora would be damned if that’d happen to her. 

It was good that he had wandered to what appeared to be a young woman with a friendly enough face. Though, these days you couldn’t really judge things by appearances. But Aurora knew enough that this woman wasn’t a threat. She knew what a few of the Death Eaters looked like and she didn’t resemble any of them. Aurora knew the woman meant no harm, but she couldn’t imagine letting Cedric out of her eyesight for more than a second. Of course he was curious, he was four, after all. But it wasn’t like when she was a child, over two decades ago. Danger was all around them, but she tried to not allow herself to think like that. “Yes, he definitely is curious,” she said with a smile, looking down at Cedric, who was now hiding between her legs, peeking out from behind them. 

“Nice to meet you, Daisy,” she said, sticking out one of her hands to shake Daisy’s. “I’m Aurora. And of course Cedric is actually shy now,” Aurora laughed a little. “He wasn’t bothering you was he?”

Nothing was easy these days. Not just from a family point-of-view, but because of the new government and the family. The “having a baby in the middle of a literal blood war” certainly wasn’t ideal and certainly wasn’t what either Amos or her had been planning. But they had wanted a family at some point and they decided to go on with it anyways. They could protect each other and Cedric. That much was possible. Of course, Aurora always wanted to do a little bit more than that. And Amos wanted to help as well, especially since they couldn’t be too involved. Or, at least, for Cedric’s safety they couldn’t be.

Yes, she had stepped back from the Order when she had found out she was pregnant, but that didn’t mean she had stopped supporting the group as a whole or the individual members. The code system made it trickier. All code fives were criminals and if she, or Amos, was caught helping them then that meant they’d become code fives themselves. Or worse. 

Fabian was one she helped the most these days. From what she knew, his living conditions were not great and he didn’t have a job, like she knew a couple other code fives did. She knew he was a grown adult, not a helpless child, but she couldn’t help but mother him. It was just in her nature these days. 

Aurora had sent him a code message asking him to come over to their house in two days. She had been on a baking spree and had other items she wanted to give him for the time being. Everything had to be done carefully, especially with the dark shadows she had been seeing more and more of these days. He’d be disguised, which was as good as it got these days. 

@auroradiggory​

Honestly, she was tired of it all.  She was tired of the worst of their world dictating the rules.  She was tired of the best people that she knew getting treated as though they were nothing.  She was tired of being terrified that every time one of her friends went out alone it would be the last time that she saw them.

Ever since she had learned the basics of what had happened to Fabian when he encountered William, and she knew it was the basics because after three encounters with William Mulciber she knew there was no way that the tame story she had been fed was entirely accurate, she was angry.  But more than angry, she was guilty.

So when she saw Aurora Diggory in Muggle London – and it was infuriating how often that happened these days.  Muggle London was supposed to be a safety net, and instead the magical community was beginning to run freely within it – she knew she had to approach her.  She was so, so incredibly tired of not knowing who they could trust.  She was so tired of watching her friends get hurt.  Maybe she could figure this one out at least.  “Aurora,” she said quietly, as she approached her.  Her voice far quieter than the yelling she felt inside.  “Do you think that we could talk for a moment?  I passed a crowded coffee shop.  Should be easy enough to blend.”

**

The world was not going to change overnight. Even though it seemed like it did anyways. But Aurora knew that it was possible. If it was possible for the Death Eaters then it would be possible for the Order. Of course, that meant the Order actually had to reunite and get to work. Not that she was a formal member, not at the moment anyway.

They had been. Both her and Amos. But then she got pregnant and everything had to change. They couldn’t be as outright with their support, they couldn’t put the baby at risk. The family they wanted at some point, even if it was inconvenient right now. She knew that Molly and Arthur had done the same thing as well. It was entirely different with a child. And still, even now, she was putting Cedric at-risk. But sitting back and doing nothing had never really been her style. 

Today, she didn’t have Cedric with her. Amos had said he’d take care of him so that Aurora could have some time for just herself. And so she found herself in Muggle London. The nostalgia of being her with her parents, with her siblings and sometimes even her muggle grandparent. Aurora recognized Mary, but just barely. Enough to know her name, code and what side she was on. She smiled a little at the younger woman before nodding her head. “Yes, of course.” It must’ve been urgent or important for the conversation to happen right now and here. 

These days, it felt like going out in public was almost asking for trouble. She knew about the shadow that appeared in the corner of her eyes. The darkness that was there when she wasn’t looking and yet gone when she turned her head. While her code status kept her and her family relatively safe. It wasn’t like she was being completely safe. Aurora tried to help out whatever Order members remained. Sending food or supplies or whatever else they needed. She knew the risks, as did her husband, but both of them weren’t ready to quite give in to violence just yet. Although these days, she was more ready than he was. 

However, she couldn’t let fear dictate her life, especially not with Cedric. While he was only four, he was smart enough to catch on to when his parents were feeling a little off. If she had said no to going to the park, then that would mean him asking questions and throwing a fit and he did deserve to believe things were fine. To run around and play with the toy broomstick he had gotten for his third birthday. Even though it did make her a bit nervous to watch him fly. Like he was growing up too quickly in such uncertain times. 

Aurora sat on a blanket in the grass, keeping a close eye on her son when she noticed the dark spot again. Quickly, she turned her head to look around and when she gave up she saw Cedric asking questions to a random stranger. Her heart raced as she jogged in a manner to still look casual. “Cedric, dear, you can’t leave mummy’s vision, okay?” She approached him and the stranger. “I am so sorry about that,” she said a bit sheepishly. “I promise I don’t let him just...fly off without a care.” Hopefully the stranger could forgive this lapse in parenting.

This is a torch song;