attempted burger

Honestly, I've only seen that awful Gary Cooper movie and saw a really long interview Phil Donahue did with her grouchy old ass once. All's I know is people who whine about taxes seem to dig her. She's too dead to have a beef with me so no feud.

from chapter 4:

from the /egg/ page of the spamton sweepstakes ARG, which is all about noelle encountering something awfully similar to another particularly infamous pokemon glitch:

and in the final section of chapter 3's mantle game, which takes place in the shelter:

combined with the glitch-like effects of the IMAGE_FRIEND instance in chapter 5 (not just the way it deals damage, but also its ACT prompt having no text and not showing a path back to the person using the ACT), i think the odds of them being glitch entities given form through a dark world are pretty high at this point - and that feels pretty notable given all the focus on game mechanics in chapter 5, and particularly the way the roaring knight, now seemingly connected to the day the shelter dark world was formed, is apparently able to ignore "fake stats" when normal gameplay mechanics can't.

...but, doesn't it stand out that the chapter 5 instance of IMAGE_FRIEND is completely harmless until you interact with it using the SOUL, at which point it turns red and inflicts damage in its weird glitchy way?

isn't it curious that the instance of IMAGE_FRIEND that can appear in the BATTAT minigame can both drain your points (a negative effect) and boost them by much more than any other cat (a positive one), but always drains your fuel to either 20% or 1% depending on whether you were already under that 20% mark or not?

isn't it peculiar that the cat heads in the shadow mantle holder fight act as minions for them, even if they're also able to drop hp candies that heal kris on every attempt at the fight beyond the first? (it's worth noting here that the mantle game intro shows the SOUL as acting through HERO_SWORD, but the shadow mantle holder fight - and only that one fight - shows both HERO_SWORD and kris taking damage...)

a recurring thing we've seen in deltarune is that darkners want to make lightners happy. even the flowers in asgore's shop are, ultimately, fundamentally inclined to be supportive of both asgore and the fun gang. if IMAGE_FRIEND is representative of glitch cats given form in the dark world, it makes sense that they're supportive of kris (a lightner) but hostile to the red SOUL (arguably a foreign entity, since it's tied to Us, The Player, even if it's tied to kris)... but both their role in the shadow mantle holder fight and their effect in the BATTAT game almost make it seem like their loyalty's a little... split?

i think all that talk about demon-summoning is relevant here, but to be clear: i don't think that IMAGE_FRIEND literally is the demon itself. but they're probably connected - and likely at least somewhat subservient - to the demon that kris communed with as a kid, and the shadow mantle holder encounter (which also has some really weird visual glitches going on, notably) is currently our clearest clue as to why, and what that means.

the thought that an entity that we've seen try to goad kris into violence, in the context of a game focused so heavily on getting stronger, being connected to reality-breaking glitch entities... is pretty worrying, to say the least.

They thought it was a sci-fi game but they also thought the monsters were going to be zombies.

Over a period of 2 hours they then proceeded to make EVERY Aliens movie cliche "mistake" known to man. Because at the time they all made sense.

The characters in a story don't know they're in a story or what kind of story it is.

Very much did in the sense that I literally do not know where my job is at the moment. But, for the time being I haven't been let go because nobody else including the store owner knows where it is either.

So, I don't wanna risk doxxing myself by posting pictures but goddamn am I tempted because this is not a believable event. This is a cartoon problem. For looneytoons.

But yeah, so, I work(ed?) at a kiosk selling boba tea, right? Freestanding kiosk in the mall with full water and electrical hookups and multiple fridges and sinks and a mini kitchen and the works. Fully functional tea shop. Very important to note that it was there last night, The work chat was discussing another issue last night at closing time. I'll get back to this.

It's been showing signs of being on the way out with how business is being handled lately and I've been considering other options, which is probably why I'm not as torn up about this as I should be, but maybe it just hasn't set in yet, but that's not the point. The point is there's been a lot of shit breaking and not being replaced and nobody mentioning anything about it until I walk into work in the morning and have to figure out why shit like the fucking cash register isn't there today. So I'm kinda used to having to ask questions about big things that nobody bothered to update me on. I was out for two weeks recovering from a surgery, so I came to work this morning assuming there'd be some kind of bullshit, yeah?

So, the question I had to ask the chat this morning was:

Not a text I ever thought I'd have to send in sincerity, but there it is. Because what I found instead was a fenced off patch of discolored tiles and a few holes in the floor where my entire place of employment used to be.

And the answer? Nobody knows! It was there last night when the mall closed, and every single trace of the structure and all its contents including drink making supplies and our safe and cashbox was gone when it opened again. And when I say nobody knows, I mean everyone from last night's closers to the actual (former?) owner of the store jad no fucking clue about this until getting that text from me this morning. For once I am actually the first to know. 🎉.

So. I guess I didn't so much lose my job as had it stolen. Not by AI, but good old fashioned hands-on human beings picking it up and carrying it away somehow. All mall security would tell me was that they were instructed not to tell me anything and have us contact our management. Who also don't know anything. And later on I came across some construction workers around the gravesite of the kiosk discussing filling in the holes, asked them about it, and was told that they "weren't at liberty to say".

So, not only is my job gone in the most literal physical sense of the word, but it was taken in some kind of super secret kiosk extraction in the dead of night without any warning or witnesses and nobody is allowed to speak of it. The store owner said she was gonna figure it out 10 hours ago and still no word back.

My mother in law thinks the FBI took it.

Not any of the other stores around the state. Just the one little kiosk.

Why? Because she loves a conspiracy and is just a little bit extra.

Also because she was around for the massive crackdown on Yakuza-owned businesses in Waikiki (in her homestate) that did actually involve the FBI seizing stores (no confirmation of making kiosks cleanly disappear in the middle of the night though).

Still no word from my job on what's actually going on, but the most likely theory so far is that maybe the kiosk was on lease and got repossessed? The mystery continues

According to the owner, based on what she's been able to find out, the kiosk was not removed legally and they're starting a potentially long process of legal action. I hope she gets to sue the shit out of whoever did it but for now at least I know for sure I'm unemployed.

Really hoping for more details in terms of who/why/how, so I'll keep updating if I learn anything.

For now the summary is: An unnamed entity that is most likely mall management (on account of mall security cooperating with them) stole an entire kiosk and all the contents including money and machinery with barely a trace in the middle of the night grinch-style, with zero warning or explanation, and ensured the silence of both security and the construction crew, in an action that was definitely preplanned and illegal, and as far as I know nobody knows its whereabouts.

Enjoy the unintentionally funniest text I've ever sent in my life

Aaand a close-up:

HEY HI HELLO THIS ONE'S MY FAVORITE