common abuser hypocrisies:
abuse is okay when i do it and nobody should feel compassion for my victim, however when it’s done to me it’s cruel and horrible and everyone should feel sorry for me
i am misunderstood, troubled, can’t properly control myself, and i just need a lot of patience and understanding, my victim however deserves none and needs to be in perfect control of their reactions and behaviour or i will abuse them even worse, and if they’re troubled and misunderstood it’s their own fault for getting themselves in that mess
i need my victim and they’re cruel and selfish if they leave, how could they do such a thing and hurt me like that, they’re heartless and vicious, however when i hurt them, a person who stays near me because i need them to, that is perfectly okay and the victim should suck it up and please me more
i decide what my victim deserves and how they should be treated, but they don’t get to decide anything about me, i am the most special person in the world and deserve only good things and to not be held accountable for bad shit i do ever, i get to decide this both for me and the victim and they have no say
whatever victim is feeling is to be dismissed and ignored because my feelings are the only ones that matter and that need to be talked about, victim’s point of view is not allowed and nobody except other abusers are allowed to say anything to me about how i treat them, i only want to hear encouragement and approval of my actions and any criticism will be attacked and suffocated and ridiculed
all the harm and fear i caused to my victim is not to be mentioned, we’re to pretend it never happened and i should get all the affection, respect, pleasing and love from the victim, however when i need to scare them into obedience or threaten and trigger them, then past should be brought up and they should be reminded of how cruel i can be if they wont obey
my victim deserves to get criticized for their appearance, actions, helplessness, weakness, insecurity, anxiety, mental illness and anything else i can find to hurt their perception of themselves, but the victim has no right to point out anything bad about me and needs to keep confirming that i am indeed perfect in comparison to them, and if they don’t i will hurt them worse
only the past moments in which i look good are allowed to be remembered or mentioned, anything else is to be instantly forgotten and buried in the past
i deserve endless compassion and sympathy, my victim deserves none, they’re to be held responsible for everything and anything i feel, they’re directly to take responsibility for my every whim and thought and feeling, I however am not responsible for anything they feel and all their reactions and feelings are completely their fault, they have to take responsibility for both me and themselves, while i am void of responsibility for anyone
all my actions are my victim’s fault and they must have provoked me if i did something cruel, i have to be given benefit of the doubt no matter what i do, my victim however, is to be scrutinized and their every step is to be taken as a provocation and aggression, even refusing to be beaten and abused and trying to get away or defend themselves is to be perceived as an aggression, even acting as a normal human being is to be seen but nothing else than provocation, they should act as i perceive them, and that is less than human being
remember when abusers talk shit while using these assumptions that they are wrong. They are responsible for everything they’ve done even when they want to pretend they’re not. They’re guilty of everything they do, even if they try to blame you. Nobody forces abusers to abuse others. They’re making a conscious choice to abuse. Never let them fool you and convince you it’s someone else’s fault, or that you should have compassion for them. Trust your own feelings and your own perception, because what they’re doing is wrong. You matter, no matter how much they try to deny it.
