Homer of a lonely Bart

scrappy doo has been found dead in miami

is he okay

hes alright but he died

My mom: So there was a shooter at the correspondents' dinner- Me: Excuse me what. What did you say. My mom, with deepest sorrow: But the president is alive and unharmed- Me: Go back did you say there was a shooter. You're on the dog. My mom: I'm on the dog???? Me: Yeah you're on the dog

The mafia isn't lookin for me and I'm enjoying a walk in the park

can someone help me find the picture of a bunch of webkinz(?) like gathered in a living room and some of them are playing a ds and some of them are sitting around a tv playing the wii and some of them are playing webkinz on a laptop and i think some of them were drawing too?? it looks like it was taken with flash on iirc and it was circulating on here a while ago

Today I cried a little bit because I remembered that when Beethoven conducted his ninth symphony for the first time he got a standing ovation and one of the sopranos had to turn him around to see the audience. 

tu LANCES félicette ? tu lances son corps comme la fusée ? oh ! oh ! prison pour les scientifiques ! prison pour les scientifiques pendant Un Mille Ans !

I can see now that “oh fuck I’m gonna soak my jorts” was not an acceptable response to seeing how much pork shoulder I can get for 20$. I’m listening to the grocery shopping community and holding myself accountable.

my friend’s gorgeous and wonderful partner who I rlly enjoy has told me that they see this post on their dash constantly. thank you tumblr for showing cool non binary people me soaking my jorts over meat as many times as possible

hi european here. what the fuck is that

we should start giving testosterone to ants

uncles

Austin was my favorite backyardagain because he wasn't in as many episodes as the others and I felt bad for him