BOYS WHO NEED THERAPY

‘ fuck off , ‘  he’s been witness to heavenly deities ,  he’s seen hellish ghosts ,  but nothing chilled him like an unidentifiable intellectual other with a callous curiosity ,  hoping to make clean cuts out of him without a spent shred of guilt .  if they dug deep enough ,  would they find the shadowy soul of a karmic criminal ?  could they sever it from the flesh ,  or would it disintegrate in the light ,  leave not even dust settling in the palm of their hand ?  he doesn’t want to find out .  ‘ i couldn’t give less of a shit if you’re a ‘fan’ .  i’m not a case study ,  so don’t try me like one .  ya want somethin’ ,  it’s gotta be a transaction .  answer one a’ my questions ,  an’ i’ll answer one a’ yours at a time .  how’s that sound ? ‘

In his first interaction with a human or pseudo-human (whatever this man may be) Adam couldn’t help but find the other’s mannerisms quite endearing, despite being extremely rude. No, it was the fact that it was rude and crude that was intriguing-- machines only copied human mannerisms, and androids were all well-spoken to an extent as per their militaristic coding. Expletives were rarely exchanged in his memory, not to mention coming from a place of sincerity. So Adam’s face remained that of confidence and amusement as he nodded. “I see, that is quite acceptable. Before this exchange of information, shall we introduce ourselves?” Adam gracefully bowed like a human aristocrat he had seen in his records, one hand resting on his chest. 

what the fuck ?  just where does he begin ?  the eccentricity of so much “fascination ,”  or the accurate observation of secrets-he-doesn’t-say ?  he’s always been in-between ,  an interloper at the boundaries of life and death .  a creature of belief ,  who would die to vivisection ,  spill blood from open wounds ,  because he was convinced his body contained and genuinely needed it —  because he was convinced his body was his .  ‘ the hell are ya talkin’ about … ? ‘  a growl ,  more wild animal than man .  there’s a glint in his eyes and a curl of his fist to serve as tense warnings .  a single step out of that circle ,  and he would land a blow to keep them in line .  ‘ i’m human .  that’s all there is to me .  the fuck are you ?  a freak doctor ,  or a mad scientist wanna-be ? ‘

SAMATOKI NEEDN’T PRY FOR MORE, he infers enough as necessary from the way Jyuto spoke — work trouble, huh?  He makes a point ( OR RATHER, Katen demands a point ) of staying as far away from cops that aren’t Jyuto as he can, but sometime’s he’s half a mind to give them a piece of it every now and then… but that’d just make more trouble, huh? Fists don’t solve everything, after all, no matter how hard Samatoki would like to ( forcibly ) infer the otherwise.  “ Nice way of sayin’ you’re leashin’ me for awhile? TCH, ”  He mulls over his cigarette for a moment or two before letting out a sigh.  “ Fine, I’ll keep my nose clean. Would hate to concern anyone. We’ll deal with our shit on the downlow, leave some space up here for you. ” He leans in to close a little of the distance, dropping his voice to a whisper as if people were listening in. “ Could drop you a few hints at some places to bust to get the heat off of you, if y’need. Might kill two birds with one stone. “

ok everyone this is it this is the moment none of you have been waiting for

your family doesn't need to be blood.

you have felt alone for a very long time. i'm sorry about that. im sorry you haven't had a home, a safe place, an okay rest. i am sorry you wake up so tired and that your shoulders are up around your ears. it is not fair. you are lovely. there are people who will learn this, one day. it is worth it to wait to meet those people -- you will find you have built your own home, and your own family, and it will be strong. it will be powerful. and it will be as lovely as you are. know you can build something with your own hands. know that you will be safe. know that you can make a life in any shape that you need. the love you have inside of you is a flower & one day you will have a garden full of petals & leaves.

New theme and I finally finished the website! A lot of characters are pretty barebones at the moment though.

When it’s lit, Samatoki’s quick to stuff it between his lips and take a long, almost exhausted drag before letting out a gruff laugh, all deep and throaty. “Fair, y’got me there.” He contends, shrugging his shoulders and leaning his head back as the rest of the billowing smoke caught in his lungs drifts out into the cold air around them — for a moment he just stares at him, eyes flicking between Jyuto’s face and the cigarette he held, as though conjuring a thought he’d been holding on the backburner.  “So, you were busy, huh? Nothin’ bad goin’ on? If any of my boys are causing you problems I can take it up with my old man, things have been messy.”

Been working on a lot of graphics and muse pages on a new website where I’m going to host all of my muses. And by all I mean ALL, across all of my active (or soon to be active) blogs. So far that’s just this blog and @soverxign​. I have an old multimuse too-- I’m planning on transferring some muses I’m still interested in writing to this blog. There’s also a few new muses I’ve been wanting to add!

Potential muses include:

Overlord Abel / Kazuya Minegishi // Devil Survivor 1

Goro Akechi // Persona 5

Raindrop Cake // Food Fantasy

Joseph Desaulnier // Identity V

Edgar Valden  // Identity V

Norton Campbell // Identity V

Kim Dokja // Omniscient Reader

Add / Edward Grenore // Elsword

Kiyoshi Matsuoka // Fandomless Modern OC

Alcott Ethelberd Caulfield // Rune Factory OC

Cichol Gricenchos // Fallen London OC

Fan Xia // Food Fantasy OC

Ba’alzebul // Food Fantasy OC

As a genius with an IQ of 168 and photographic memory due to having the Retaining Eyes, Shintaro is highly intelligent and rational. He is very advanced academically, and easily picks up skills which require logic such as coding. However, being far ahead of his peers for his entire life caused him to become apathetic, lethargic, and quite a bit arrogant. Cynical and self-isolating, overall Shintaro is quite negative in character and attitude, and though he is aware of his own faults, he doesn't feel any motivation to change himself.

His attitude is one of the reasons he never connected well with other people and didn't really have friends until high school. During high school he met and became friends with Tateyama Ayano, Kokonose Haruka, and Enemoto Takane. He was especially close with Ayano, as she was always reaching out to him and treating him with kindness despite his abrasive nature.

While it could be said that Shintaro had some form of high-functioning depression for most of his life, he was well and truly pushed into a deep, non-functioning depression after the death of his three friends when he was 16, one of which (Ayano's suicide) he believes is his fault. He torments himself, determined to never forget about Ayano and how he was the cause of her suicide, effectively deciding to live in the past. He dropped out of high school and shut himself up in his room, living as a hikkikomori and NEET.

As a form of escape, he spends all of his time either on the computer or sleeping, oftentimes skipping/forgetting meals. While his mother and his sister Momo have attempted to interact with him, he tends to lash out at them, especially if they "trespass" into his room, which is his sanctuary from the outside world and his self-created prison. As a result, he has become rather estranged from them despite living in the same household, which further compounds his own guilt and self-hatred.

“Yeah, yeah,” Samatoki isn’t as afraid to roll his eyes ‘til the sun comes up and does so, before stuffing his hand into his pocket to pull out a packet of cigarettes — a little tap to knock one up and grab it with his teeth, pack stuffed back into his pocket as he starts patting himself down for the little lighter he keeps. “You worried? It’s family business, some — you got a light?” He interrupts himself to ask that, having realised at some point they probably took that off him — they might not pat him down properly, but they do like to make sure he can’t hurt anyone with any weapons while he’s in there — and approaches Jyuto, holding his cigarette out between his fingers expectantly. “Some family shit goin’ on, My old man’s got it  mostly under control, but I’m startin’ to think he sent me out tonight as a distraction. Bet he was pulling some real shit while your fuckheads were stuffing me in lockup.” He snorts, then sighs. “You adding this one to my tab then? Got me nervous ‘bout the day you decide to call in a favour, y’know.”