M_eow

before we go inside i have something i need to tell you. dont try to lie inside my house. i know its an annoying rule but i need you to promise to take it seriously. there are truth shrews in the walls and if you fib even a little bit they will chew through the electricals in retaliation and its fucking expensive to replace. metaphors are okay but i need you to swear that everything you say from the moment you set through that door will have an essential sincerity to it or the shrews will fuck me over. call an exterminator? no can do, truth shrews are a protected species in this neck of the woods. plus i introduced them myself. to take care of the deceit spiders, you see

if at first you don't succeed have you tried making really sad meows until she takes pity on you

new method

Every time it's hot out and i complain about the summer sun and heat someone's always like "Well can't you wear something other than all black all day every single day" NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this is the correct opinion

i just onomatopeed on the floor

@wormnobook told me to reblog this and now wont like it :/ and I thought we were friends...

i just onomatopeed on the floor

dude. bensons going to mercilessly punish our holes and throats for this

really missing... *checks calendar*... one week ago..

no more chalkboard </3

animal children are wonderful and should be celebrated!

if a tigergirl got off topic during a conversation she would wave her paw and say "but i tigress"

me if u even care

Hwve u ever tried music listening before. omg

its kind of sad that bugs are so weak. it dishonors their noble biology. i guess this is is why crustaceans are so admirable. imagine for a moment, an unsquishable bug. such is the way of the crab

they’re foreclosing on my mind palace

THEY BETTER NOT BE!!!!! I PUT A LOT OF EFFORT INTO REMODELING RECENTLY!!!!

what they don’t tell you is you have to be so so careful when you listen to music because sometimes ☝️ it will reflect your experiences