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Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@astarisfalling

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mods are asleep u know what time it is
i never understood why feminists get upset when people say our view of womanhood is just downright dreadful, that it’s not tea and it doesn’t eat and it’s just not the moment and it’s booooring and we make womanhood sound awful. and such and such demographic has a more beautiful view of it that we just don’t see.
because it’s true. it’s all true. they are right.
gender is the social system of female slavery that predates written history. gender was designed for this purpose and that is how it is enforced. what we call “female socialization” is really the psychological torture of the female human from birth to grave. all of these sociological terms, these analytical definitions, these cold, academic phrases protect us all from plainly confronting the horror and violence. psychological torture of women and girls becomes “female socialization,” the culturally encouraged compulsion to violate women and girls becomes “male socialization,” rape becomes “non-consenting sex,” sexual slavery becomes “heterosexuality,” and so on.
this psychological torture induces suicidal tendencies, self annihilation, and slave-like discipline and obedience into the minds of the female human. our natural fight or flight response is cruelly ground into dust due to the enforcement of gender. we are taught that self defense is inconvenient. we are violently groomed to value frailty and cowardice over strength and bravery, because femininity demands weakness. we do not eat. we put cancer causing chemicals on our faces, in our hair, in our vulvas in an attempt to fix what isn’t broken. we give ourselves infections. we punish our bodies for the crime of being female and our punishment is celebrated and rewarded. we are dying. we are taught to accelerate our own deaths for the benefit of men and civilization at large. a death cult and a slave society is forcefully installed in our minds and we are not free until death. that is what gender is.
gender transforms us into non-sentient objects, socially speaking. our social, physical, and sexual boundaries are held in contempt because they are not supposed to exist. gender maims and kills us. gender is wrapped up in god and the devil, and scripture and psychology, and religion and secularism, and it seems like we need to destroy heaven, hell and earth to be free of it. that is our impossible task.
that’s not very beautiful.
we aren’t supposed to see these things and we definitely aren’t supposed to name them. seeing the truth makes us mentally ill, naming the truth makes us bigots. i embrace our status as black sheep. we are criminals for seeing and naming. i look forward to what we will become when we move from seeing and naming and become brave enough to organize and attack. monsters? ghouls? a new kind of witch? the right wing says our rejection of men’s birthright makes us exterminators, harbingers of human extinction. that’s pretty cool. but that’s not beautiful. none of it is beautiful, and it is bereft of romance. the lovers of womanhood are right about that.
this is where we depart from our male supremacist enemies on the right and our male supremacist “allies” on the left. malcolm x spoke of foxes and wolves and they both have an appetite for our flesh as an entitlement and as a commodity, because of gender. all political movements need us to comply with our subjugation—the fascists, the communists, the anarchists, the liberals, the centrists. everyone loves gender. we must kill what they love. that’s not fun. no revolutionary goal is fun.
rejecting men’s ultimate political interest in our subjugation is very, very dreadful, and you will be excommunicated from the dominant social fabric for doing so. the wife who complains of her husband raping her too much will be banished from the village. the uterus haver whose vulva fails the moral criteria of unfettered inclusitivity will be kicked out of the queer socialist group chat. what happened to eve is simply the instructional manual for all women under patriarchy—you will be excommunicated for seeking knowledge and being disobedient.
being free sounds scary, confronting our prison sounds alienating, wouldn’t it be better to just have fun? if the slaves are conscious about their condition, they might resist, and that just isn’t beautiful. it’s not tea. it doesn’t eat. it’s not the moment.
while queers are telling us to smile a little bit more, to tap into our beautiful feminine souls and become empowered, sounding eerily similar to the christians they claim to hate so much, their right wing rivals want to abolish no fault divorce. our male comrades tell us we are counterrevolutionary for refusing to wait until they address men’s issues first. subservient leftist women who are deputized as prison wards to contain a feminist revolt are no better than tradwives. they both have chosen a specific male demographic to serve. why can’t we?
we are caught between two competing male supremacist movements that seek to extract resources from women’s labor, wombs, vulvas and flesh. that is what “Politics” is. that is what the real gender binary is. the global war between the older patriarchy of traditional feudal-agrarian societies and the modern patriarchy of liberal industrialized nations. they are competing over how the woman is regulated—through prostitution or through marriage? as birthing people or as surrogates?
it is too late to remove this knowledge from written history, so the modern patriarchy of liberal, industrial capitalism seeks to obfuscate these sexed patterns instead. we can’t name what we can’t define. it’s just too complex and too sophisticated and you need to be intersectional. if you still manage to name it after cutting through all of these distortions, excommunication awaits. we are all at risk of becoming eve for looking patriarchy in the eye and gouging it out. we must band together as vagrants and refugees.
but let’s not get distracted here. we are on no side of this war. excuse me for being ugly, and dramatic, and offensive, and boring. i like doing fun things. maybe the buzzkills will figure out what fun and beauty are all about one day. until then, the accusations are all true. our assessment will resonate with women as they see their position in our civilization for what it is, and we will not stop naming it until we have freed ourselves from it. i’m tired of us complaining too. we need to wrap this stage of history up and put it to sleep, for good.
ok so, I approached my local library with a proposal to donate a mural as a way to A: build portfolio/gain practical experience and B: give back to a beloved public institution. The director was very enthusiastic about it and i've been working on it since the beginning of March. Come with me as I endeavor to paint what is in all honesty an excessive amount of birds
I wanted the birds to look like they were actually in the space so first thing after doing the draft was to do a lighting study
after that I covered the walls in letters in lieu of a projector/vr headset bc i have neither of those :) Then i take a picture of the section of wall and superimpose the lineart over top of it so I can pencil in the lines
et voila
and that was a whole week on it's own so next comes the paintin' >:)
and now, the birds
Birds 1 and 2/14: Red Winged Blackbird, Male and female, Agelaius phoeniceus
Bird 3/14, American Robin, Turdus migratorius
hoo boy, ok *out of breath*
GIVE IT UP FOR BIRD NUMBUH 5, THE CANADIAN GOOSE, Branta canadensis!!!!
this guy took me about 4 days to completely finish, all of those freakingk coverts were a bear to render
speaking of obnoxious coverts:
bird 5/14, Bluejay, Cyanocitta cristata
the friggin stripes almost got me chat, i may not make it
Madam....
birds 6 and 7: American Goldfinch, Spinus tristis, male and female
pleasantly simple to paint! next is the flickerrrrr
*melts into goo*
BIRD NUMBER 8, (yellow shafted) NORTHERN FLICKERRRRR, Colaptes auratus
genuinely made me start questioning my sanity around day 3, it's half the size the of the goose, WHY did it take me 4 days to finish??
nothing but pain and suffering, i'm sure hope the next bird will be much easier and with FAR less barring :)
in other news, I am losing my mind hairline
SHE'S DONE!!
Bird number 9: Red-tailed hawk, Buteo jamaicensis
my chains are broken i am FREE. although i did have a great deal of fun with this, the barring on the wings itself took me like four days and i am READY to move on
this was a week and a half of continuous work so please excuse me for getting a little emotional in the bg 🙏
*does a little jig*
BIRD NUMBER 10!!! The Male Mallard Duck, Anas platyrhynchos
the male and female ones are gonna be posted separately bc they're taking a lot longer lol but yea! super happy i was able to capture the iridescent green of the head, i found metallic green and blue paint at a craft store that really made his head POP. it looks better in person i promise
ALSO!! As this is the 10th one, BIG announcement. The end is in sight!!!!! I plan to finish within the next 3 weeks and there will be a small dedication ceremony/ unveiling happening at the library to commemorate its completion on the 16th of May. If you live in the Western New York region and want to check it out for yourself shoot me a dm!
Also thank you everyone for your kind words and support throughout this whole process, it's been a genuine treat thinking there are potentially thousands of you out there cheering me on while I paint this 🥹
aaaand another one bites the duck,
we're movin right along with bird numero 11!! The lady Mallard!! Anas platyrhyncos
the 16th is looming in the distance so i'm trying to get thru these as quickly as i can so i can have as much time for the GBH as possible. i still need to do the names next to all of them so i've got about a week and a half to finish everything which is GREAT because i have adhd and nothing gets my ass in gear like a fuckin deadline, let me tell you
power couple that they are, here's bird number 12 and 13,
the Northern Cardinals, Cardinalis cardinalis
and NOW that they are complete, ITS GO TIME, in the next five days (library's closed for mother's day 😭😭) i need to have the GBH fully rendered, the names of the birds vectored, weeded, masked, applied to the wall, and then painted, plus additional cattails throughout. I may be able to get away with just getting the GBH done in time for the unveiling and then just have the names and cattails added later, but i'm gonna really try to get it all done in time. BUT, i have a plan. Part of why i take so long on these is because i really am just figuring it out as I do it lmao. there have been many a time where i am sitting on top of the ladder googling "how to paint birds" but I think if i take the time tomorro to do all that figuring out how to approach it beforehand, this will go a lot faster. I may also recruit some of my artist friends to help with the placing of the names... hrmm we'll see.
Anyways, shout out to the librarian who tracked down exactly the thing i needed so i could figure out where to place the highlights in my birds eyes, ur the real mvp
thanks for the reminder, kid
at long last, we've reached the end...
Bird number 14 out of 14,
The Great blue heron, Ardea herodius
thank you to everyone who reached out or got excited about this project, it genuinely gave me the fuel i needed to keep going. In total, the 480+ total hrs it took me to cover this wall pales in comparison to how long its expected to spend on there, hopefully imparting a sense of beauty and love for the natural world to the next generation and here's hoping i'm only getting started with these.
i'll see y'all soon :')
ok so, I approached my local library with a proposal to donate a mural as a way to A: build portfolio/gain practical experience and B: give back to a beloved public institution. The director was very enthusiastic about it and i've been working on it since the beginning of March. Come with me as I endeavor to paint what is in all honesty an excessive amount of birds
I wanted the birds to look like they were actually in the space so first thing after doing the draft was to do a lighting study
after that I covered the walls in letters in lieu of a projector/vr headset bc i have neither of those :) Then i take a picture of the section of wall and superimpose the lineart over top of it so I can pencil in the lines
et voila
and that was a whole week on it's own so next comes the paintin' >:)
'When dawn breaks, I worry and start crying. "It's OK," you whisper to me. Were you crying too?'
this was supposed to be a joke

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Female animals get their due in Lucy Cooke’s exploration of the roles of the sexes in biology and evolution.
Excerpt from this story from Science News:
To Charles Darwin, nature had a certain order. And in that order, males always came out on top. They were the leaders, the innovators, the wooers and the doers.
“The males of almost all animals have stronger passions than the females,” Darwin wrote in 1871. “The female, on the other hand, with the rarest of exceptions, is less eager.” The founder of evolutionary theory posited that throughout the animal kingdom, males are active, females are passive, and that’s pretty much that. Females, in sum, are boring.
That’s poppycock, Lucy Cooke writes in her latest book, Bitch. This blinkered view of nature as a man’s world was conceived and promulgated by Victorian men who imposed their values and world view on animals, she says. Cooke, a documentary filmmaker and the author of The Truth About Animals and two children’s books (SN: 4/14/18, p. 26), has traveled the world and met scientists who are exposing the truth about the sexes. She takes readers on a wild ride as she observes the ridiculous mating rituals of sage grouse, searches for orca poop (to monitor sex hormones) and watches female lemurs boss around males.
Through such adventures, Cooke learns that females are anything but boring. “Female animals are just as promiscuous, competitive, aggressive, dominant and dynamic as males,” she writes.
That may not sound radical to today’s feminists, but in the field of evolutionary biology, such a pronouncement has long bordered on the heretical. Generations of biologists have focused on male behavior and physiology, on the assumption that females are little more than baby-making machines to be won over by the strongest, showiest males.
“Historically, when females did something potentially interesting, like exercise leadership over their social groups, many scientists scratched their heads and chalked it up as an aberration. When behavior didn’t fit the mold, like female-dominant spotted hyenas or peaceable male pinyon jays, it was either ignored or shoehorned into existing theory. For instance, ornithologists posited that aggressive female pinyon jays must suffer “the avian equivalent of PMS,” Cooke writes. The reality is that pinyon jays have a complex social hierarchy that doesn’t include the “alpha male” that scientists had expected. In recent years, scientists (many, but not all of them, female themselves) have begun to challenge Darwinian dogma about the sexes and submit it to rigorous testing.”
absolutely fucking incredible
astonishing, even
Do you remember that one scene where Leafpaw knew Squirrelpaw needed a certain herb, so she ate it and Squirrelpaw could feel what the herb was? I wonder if, to mess with each other, they eat really gross things because they know the other would taste it too. Because, as someone with a sibling, if I knew that they could taste whatever I'm eating, I'm shoving garlic down my throat in a heartbeat.
after being offered the role of poop
like "we're going to have some fun now"
people who had good childhoods and were normal before they started watching porn love saying this

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its crazy men literally do not experience any real sexuality or eroticism they just have sadism and all of society pretends that's enough. romance is absolutely something which only occurs between girls/women and people will borderline admit that all the time.
People need to expand their horizons and seriously start yurifying their brains. Everyone is so yaoipilled these days. We, as a society need to start thinking about yuri more & make more yuri content. EVERYONE START YURIMAXXING RIGHT NOW, ITS NEVER TOO LATE!
wtf = wheres the femslash
a prayer before dinner
he absolutely refuses to stop serving

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
proposing a new genre of fiction called an anti-romance where u r presented w a couple at the start & the story is about their emotional journey towards a catastrophic break up
this is devilman and or berserk coded.
on account of today's temperature reaching 33° im bringing back the most iconic moment of 2024 aka the GQ China Heatstroke Photoshoot