Mak

Season 3 completely overrides this and says humans never had free will in the first place because of the existence of angels and demons. Which disregards both logic and continuity because of what I just said but then! The universe that God creates as a better world with free will for everyone… is exactly the same as the old one. History, present, all of humanity’s choices… exactly. The. Same.

this leaves only two options of interpretation: either this new universe thing failed (or God tricked Aziraphale and Crowley) and humanity still doesn’t have free will and is following some kind of divine plan… or it turns the argument right back around and proves that the old universe did have free will after all and the whole move of destroying it was a stupid idea in the first place. So either way it’s not a happy ending because crowley and aziraphale killed themselves for nothing.

Coming this summer...

"I Woke Up And Summer's Gone"

📝by @maidenimage

🎨with art by @artnmak ☀️as part of the @gosummerbang

Summary:

Aziraphale has attended the Camelot Carnival every summer since he was a boy. Now that he's old enough to have godchildren that he adores, his favorite summer tradition is taking them to see all that the festival has to offer. But he'd be lying if he said tradition was the only thing keeping him coming back year after year. Then again, you'll never get him to admit to his coy infatuation with the attractive red-headed man who operates the Ferris Wheel...

Here's a teaser from chapter 1! Be sure to follow me on AO3 to get a notification when the story starts posting. It will be seven (vignette-length) chapters, about 10k in all. 😊

For those who don’t know, the various patterns of tartan actually hold special significance to Europeans. Different styles of tartan are used to indicate a person’s allegiance to a certain clan, family, or order. It is even illegal in some places to wear specific brands of tartan without permission from the person in charge of the group to which the pattern belongs.

This being said, Aziraphale wears a very specific style of tartan. It’s called “Heaven’s Dress Tartan,” and it was designed specifically for Michael Sheen to wear in the show.

The naming of this tartan, along with the fact that it is the only tartan we see him wear, would indicate that this pattern is actually the official tartan of heaven. But as we see when Aziraphale is handed his military uniform and told to go assume command of his platoon, (they wouldn’t be waiting for him unless he was their Sargent - fight me,) Heaven has its own official Tartan, and it’s not the one Aziraphale is wearing.

Furthermore, when Aziraphale is discorporated and winds up in Heaven, the Heaven’s Dress Tartan on his bow-tie is gone.

This leads me to conclude that, since Aziraphale is wearing a unique tartan that does not match heaven’s, our dear Principality made his own tartan. He didn’t see that pattern somewhere and think it was nice, and he doesn’t wear it to show his allegiance to Heaven. This is A.Z. Fell’s clan tartan. He designed it for himself to wear, as his symbol. If he had a family, it would be their family tartan. 

Now, a thing about clan tartans is you’re only really supposed to wear it if you’re a member of the clan; i.e., a member of the family. Which brings up an interesting point:

Twice in the show, Aziraphale gives Crowley the Heaven’s Dress Tartan. The first is when he gives him the holy water. (Isn’t it sweet, the vessel he uses is decorated to represent himself?) This could perhaps be dismissed under the theory that it was simply what Aziraphale had on hand - it could easily have been any other securely-shut cup. 

However, in the scene where Crowley and Aziraphale meet Anathema, Aziraphale miracles a tartan bike rack onto the Bentley (which I couldn’t find a picture of). Aziraphale is willingly giving Crowley his specific tartan. Now remember what I said about clan tartans only being worn by members of the clan?

also if you zoom in it’s, like, blurry and annoying

clearly this Will Not Do

Behold! The fruit of an entire day’s worth of squinting at pixels:

the weaving recipe for one full pattern repeat of Heaven’s Dress Tartan!

The blue is more or less faded in different scenes with different be-tartaned items so feel free to adjust to taste

super faded on his bowtie, probs. because the dork has been wearing it for centuries

The result when woven up and repeated should look like so:

ah but there’s more

because they specified that this is Heaven’s *Dress* tartan (and indeed it is, as more than half of the colors in it can be sourced from various natural colors of undyed wool)

this implies the existence of a Heaven’s Standard Tartan, and possibly even a Heaven’s Hunter tartan! and now that we have identified the threadcount pattern, we can reverse-engineer them!

In particular, I’m taking inspiration from the Buchanan tartan, because this is the Dress version:

which looks rather compatible with our Heaven’s Dress, no?

and this is the Buchanan Standard, which rather excitingly *inverts* the proportions of color found in the Dress:

why do I say this is exciting?

because if we apply this (cherry-picked, not the general rule of most tartans) principle to our Heaven’s Dress Tartan, we can make something that has large amounts of red and black

something that matches the hair of a certain Demon

which makes calling it Heaven’s Standard Tartan a bit weird but who cares! Not me! Let’s do this!

Crowley would feel obligated to mock it but imagine, if you would, Punk Crowley with patches of this on their black leather studded vest, or Female-Presenting Crowley in a classic butch lesbian flannel

here’s the recipe if y’all need it:

and finally have some Heaven’s Hunter just because the name sounds badass and I like being a completionist:

that’s… actually kinda nice?

l’anyhoodle, if any of y’all are fiber arts nerds like me, or super hardcore cosplayers, here you go, I give it to you, free to use Creative Commons etc. blah blah

if you actually weave up one of these, please, for the love of sweet shiny squirrels, I’d love to see it

if you wanna do a nice twill, just multiply each color segment by whatever, this is just the smallest common denominator of the ratios of the pattern cuz I figured that bowtie is *damn* small and I don’t have the skill or insanity to be doing fuggin 

luxury 1800 count satin bedsheets here

i liked that scene of trash crowley

Tenna art by @9Aaaalt29 on twt