the koi in the koi pond waiting for you to feed them the food pebbles
i think about this post at least once a week

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@arteshin1
the koi in the koi pond waiting for you to feed them the food pebbles
i think about this post at least once a week

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"sorry that probably doesn't make much sense" <- for perfectly intelligible & logical statements relevant to the present conversation
"you get what I mean." <- for unparsable non sequiturs
“as you do” <- for incredibly eccentric and even impossible actions
"I can't believe humans would hunt the thylacine to extinction, humans are fundamentally evil" Hey, did you know that extinction was long thought to be impossible, and within 50 years of humans realizing that extinction via overhunting was a possibility it practically stopped happening? Did you know that humans are so desperate to prevent more losses that they're funneling millions of collective hours and billions of euros into helping other species? Hours and euros that could be spent on humans, and species on whom humanity's own survival does not depend? Did you know that due to an accidental introduction of rats, the Lord Howe Island stick insect population was brought down to 24 individuals and now there are tens of thousands of them?
This bug. This bug that, to most humans, is utterly useless, relatively gross, and completely foreign. Humans saved it because humans do not want to cause another extinction ever again if they can avoid it.
the last food you ate is your nickname now how is it going
good
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great
awful
results
did you know you can rename everything on your pc

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I bore witness to a vehicle whose headlights were bright enough to beam the humidity in the air into visibility. It looked like just that car was driving through a fog. I feel like this is unnecessary
politicians will name their proposals "the act to defend freedom and justice by the honesty coalition of friendship" and the contents will be a comprehensive plan on how the state should spike the tap water with giardia and start guillotining elderly golden retrievers in public
im not using wojaks. get on my level
It exists and it's called Portland, Oregon

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Oregon Trip ; Sony a100
I bet Jar Jar is fucking hung like a whale. God he can raw me anyday.
I spent like two? Three? Entire weeks with this sitting in my askbox and I just. I got nothing. What could I possibly answer? I tried all the “nope” gifs in this god forsaken website, I tried to draw what my face looks like every time I read this, I tried to find fanart of jar jar with his wang out and the universe was kind enough to me so that I couldn’t find any. I got nothing. Nada. Abso-fucking-lutely nothing. What am I gonna say? What in god’s name am I gonna say to that?!
You see, I wanna fuck general grievous. I do. I want him use all his four arms to simultaneously pull both my arms back and touch my tits as he fucks me with his mecha-schlong. I do. I wanna fuck darth Maul, pre-legs cut off or post metal legs+metal dick enhancement. I wanna lick those horns. Okay? I wanna fuck darth vader. Boy, oh, boy, I do. I wanna hear that hard breathing and wrap my legs over that dramatic cape while he force-chokes me and we do the do. Am I a weird robot-fucker? You bet your ass I am! Am I a tad too much on the horny side? Probably. Did I extrapolate my right to be horny on main? Fucking sue me. But this. THIS.
How do you want me to face my family and all the three (3) friends I have irl? How do you want me to walk into an elevator with a bunch of strangers and when an old lady says “the weather has been a little hot lately, isn’t it weird?” just to do small talk like every fucking old people I don’t know do, how do you expect me not to answer her with “y’know what’s weirder, someone at this very moment is thinking about Jar Jar Binks going balls-deep in them and I cannot talk about this to anyone and the knowledge of this? it’s eating me alive. ALIVE, ma’am, and I don’t mean this as some sick vore reference. Someone’s dreaming of those popped-up eyes, of that weird high-pitched voice screaming MEESA COMING while they’re filled up by Jar Jar Bink’s thick seed, and I’m just standing here while this very notion rots me to the core, taking all life away from me. It’s a nightmare. My entire life, a nightmare, because of an anon message from a horny jar jar fucker on tumblr. This is my floor now, ma’am, have a good day”
I leave the elevator. I probably have an appointment, but I can’t remember where, or what for. I sit down on the floor by the elevator doors. I sob for a full minute. I take the elevator back downstairs, I walk home, I collapse in bed and rub one out thinking of darth vader. I feel better.
Five minutes later, I think about this ask again, and my whole world collapses again. It’s only Tuesday. I sigh heavily and sit down to write this reply.-
Edit: a lot of this is exaggeration. Some of it is true. You get to pick what exactly.
I completely forgot that this post existed. For god knows what reason I had it bookmarked in my internet browser. Why did I find it pertinent to remember this. Who was I before now.
I run into people on the internet who seem to assume that everyone secretly wants to live a rural life as a farmer and at a certain point I’m like okay man if you believe that so hard why aren’t you getting a degree in agriculture or something?
Or are you just staring at solar punk and cottage core drawings and yearning after a reality that will never exist
Come on bitch, get into plant biology. Study supply chains. Start shoveling cow poop. Spend all day trying to figure out what’s eating your tomatoes. Make the reality you want for yourself.
Study the science of agriculture. Spray some chemicals. Release the ladybugs. Come on now.
Like seriously there’s organic farming communes out there you could join. One of my cousins lives that life.
I’m serious. Do you actually want that life? Like actually? Picking spinach out in the sun? Living communally? If you actually want that there’s ways for you to do it.
I know I don’t want that because I’ve grown my own food before. But if you want it there’s not much stopping you. You could drop your current life plans and go back to school for agriculture anytime you want.
Fun Early Humans Fact!
we used to do this

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Feeling hopelessly like you're never going to succeed in your craft before even starting it is suuupre coool acaullly!!!!! verfy goid for brian
i had a dream last night that the entire world used a currency (?) called angrypennies which as the name implies are obtained by experiencing anger. the stronger and more intense your anger was, the more angrypennies you'd gain. an all-consuming rage would earn you more than a slight irritation, etc. so people were always searching for ways to fuel their anger and purposefully keeping themselves angry all the time because they wanted to earn angrypennies. unclear if angrypennies could be exchanged for goods and services, or if they were just a collectible.
anyway, as if this wasn't heavy-handed enough, at one point british comedian greg davies appeared and explained that angrypennies couldn't be worth feeling angry all the time. this was a real revelation to dream-me and i was finally able to break free of the angrypenny grind and allow myself to experience emotions other than anger.
it goes without saying that i will be using the word angrypenny as if it was part of the common vernacular instead of a term that my dreaming brain conjured up i.e. "he's all about the angrypennies" (derogatory way to refer to a guy who searches for reasons to be angry and possibly lacks introspection)