I'm gonna start biting people

i have this little headcanon that at some point maybe after retiring shane is like alright ill bite lets check out this whole music thing and then he gets very methodical with it and is basically like hm where are you supposed to start? and david (boring dad) is like well the beatles were pretty popular so shane listens to all of the beatles and then all of the pet shop boys and so it goes on and on until he gets to like fetty wap and ilyas like Baby welcome to the big leagues im taking over your education

how long until the centaurs realise that nine times out of ten when ilya asks shane to keep him company while he smokes on nights outs shane comes back flushed and ilya comes back smug and notably not smelling like tobacco

and then it suddenly makes sense that one time when shane found ilya at the bar and desperately asked do you want me to keep you company while you smoke and ilya left his seat like it was on fire and led shane through the crowd by his hand

does anyone have any perverted thoughts about hollanov