APint Of Guinness

No she did not.

And like, guys, screenshots from your server are going everywhere too. I know Bri said that she specifically did NOT apologize because she "couldn't" since Sheev had her blocked.

Even though Sheev never had her blocked at least while she was in the Saicord. Sheev was a mod and needed to see what people were saying and keep her DMs open. I believe sheev still does not have her blocked.

@thetepes

Feel free to confirm or deny.

I'm going to be VERY nice and presume YOU are mistaken, and not that Bri changed her story again.

Because when that "you're not deaf" comment happened-- she was "apologizing" for something else.

This comment:

The context of which was that--

Okay, for some weird reason there's like, quite a few fat fetish and feederism tumblr accounts who follow/are mutuals with Lily. I . . . BELIEVE the reason was that they were originally Taxxon's followers, and followed Lily after they had some kind of crossover. If I am remembering correctly. I don't remember how they got there.

Which is whatever. I make no comment on weight related fetishes. Safe and consensual, it's all good. Nuance nuance nuance. Physical health and personal autonomy. Not the point.

Bri and Bruce Bonkers were just like-- this was their new bugbear they would not shut up about for a hot minute. I remember this going on and off for a few days.

Bri and I were still on friendly (enough) terms at this point and I remember I did already try to talk to her about this. Internalized fatphobia, blah blah blah, social conditioning, blah blah blah, people are allowed to do what they like with their bodies, blah blah blah, being fat is not a sin, people can chose it if they want, blah blah blah, the speech. So she had already been told to maybe not. Nicely.

It kept goin'.

And not to imply some sort of guilt by association, but it's of note that the person egging her on was Bruce.

You know, the first infamous saicord nazi. The Elon "roman salute" defending, confederate flag fan who kept posting their Lio Convoy revenge porn art. The one that got the NSFW section nuked.

In the spirit of fairness: the nazi shit and the Lio revenge porn wasn't common knowledge in the discord yet. This was before the spirited defense of the Nazi Elon shit. I'm not trying to make it sound like Bri knew a nazi was the only one agreeing with her. But as shorthand to how bad vibes the discussion was, only the nazi was keeping this conversation going.

So eventually Sheev steps in when she starts losing her patience with these two just creating a toxic feedback loop of repeating how fatness bad.

[Yes I know it's wild the person guilty of sexually harassing Lio is litigating what is and isn't okay sexually but that's a side detail that's not important to the story-- so that's the most we are going to acknowledge it.]

[Yes that is me 100% missing the conversation going on in the chat and yapping about something else. I'm stupid.]

Anyway yeah Bri starts getting real mad Sheev is telling her that a fetish blog on tumblr dot com the home of fetish blogs of all varieties posting fetish content of consenting adults. Personal feelings about the fetish aside. Bri and Bruce start trying to move the goalpost that Sheev is defending Lily. That's when the comment from the first screenshot gets made.

People start getting upset with her.

So all those voice memos of Bri screaming "I'M SORRY!" into the microphone over and over again were over this.

Which, you know, I would personally argue is not really an apology. Especially after she starts following that up with "JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!" but, AGAIN, in the sake of fairness, we'll agree to disagree.

And that maybe, perhaps, in this one instance, the reason why she was insisting on using voice memos in this instance to convey this apology, even after being told be Sheev they did not have their hearing aids in is because this was to put on a show for everyone else watching of how bad the meanie bo beanie big scary individual of colour was making them feel. And *perhaps* this is not actually the only example of her doing this exact thing (crying into voice memos after a person of colour cheesed her biscuits for everyone else to hear.) And you know, I *could* note that, you might notice that she never used voice memos when I confronted her in private DMs. And that, maybe, was because I am, perhaps, white and there was no audience to perform to.

But in the sake of fairness-- I guess I can't prove that she doesn't cry here little eyes out about white people too. Or that she didn't just truly belief switching to voice memos was a suitable medium-- to apologize to a deaf person.

Though I'd say, even regardless of all that, this perhaps doesn't really constitute an """""apology""""" to Sheev functionally anyway because--

THIS was the comment that prompted, "you're not deaf, you just chose to ignore."

That she did NOT apologize, or """""""""""apologize"""""""""" for.

[Note: apparently you can't upload audio files directly to tumblr anymore-- which is fucking annoying. If someone DEMANDS I prove she said this, the full """"""apology"""""" of her screaming "I'm sorry! Leave me alone!" Over and over again I'll go through the effort of putting it all in a unlisted youtube video-- it's like, 15 multi-minute audio files of 25 year old toddler scream-crying and then her shutting off the crocodile tears to deliver the bigotry with full clarity though. But as far as I know, she hasn't denied she did inherently-- just wildly misrepresented what happened.]

But I want to make something clear here, just to nip this in the butt now:

This is just, arguably, the worst thing she said TOO Sheev. Personally directed at Sheev.

Up there with the worst things she said period while in the chat. This is not the only nasty thing she said to Sheev, and not the only nasty thing she said, just, in general.

While I was grabbing those screenshots I saw shit I fucking forgot about. This has been going on for so long, with such sustained intensity.

Not just from Bri. From a LOT of people. This isn't some Google Docy shit. We have all of these because the skullduggery that went on in the chat was so frequent past a certain point, Sheev and Haze were left to deal with it mostly, then JUST Sheev. Spacefrog, I love him, but he was not an active mod. I understand he's a college professor-- but three mods is already not enough to manage a server of 700+ people at it's peak, let alone really two full-time mods and one sometimes mod.

Mods who, I will remind you, could not ban people. Only Sai could. And you needed a full lawyer's dossier to convince her. And even then. If she did not deem it racist, sexist, queerphobic, or generally disruptive enough she wouldn't even tell someone to knock it off, much less ban them. Not until someone personally annoyed, or offended her.

Which again-- I UNDERSTAND. She wanted an open space that only banned people as a last resort. I even still, in the most abstract sense, respect that.

But are you starting to understand she expected her mods to be the meat shields and bad guys telling people to quite being little hooligans and then actively undermined them at every turn. Even infront of other server members.

I started spending most of the time I was in the chat after a certain point descalating shit and running interference. Because for a bunch of fucked up reasons people had more respect for ME and treated ME with less hostile energy than Sheev and Haze.

Sheev wasn't even a mod when this shit happened.

By authority via popularity contest I arguably had more power than either of them despite not ever being one. [Which, no one asked of me. I put that suffering on myself as did everyone else that tried to help in the same way-- but.]

And eventually I couldn't take it either.

The reason why I'm not dumping every awful thing Bri ever said on the internet is because I have no interest in Fennecing her. Disagree with me if you want-- but I think this mentality of singling out the one villian to nuke out of orbit as a form of social activism is fucking stupid.

Individuals can be held responsible for their individual actions-- but this shit was happening in this space because, regardless of how many problems it caused, it was being TOLERATED.

Do you see the dates on those sceeenshots.

I am not posting these because I give a fuck if Bri is in Malcom's server. I cannot MAKE any of you take this shit seriously. I do not CARE if you don't like Sheev. I'm not even doing this to fuck over Sai.

I have a LOT to post on Bri SPECIFICALLY because this went on for SO long. Sheev only stopped being her primary focus AFTER I told her to knock it the fuck off. I will post as much as I am FORCED to to prove this was an ongoing problem with Bri specifically.

But all this shit was much bigger than Bri, or the genocide guy, or anyone else who's going to try and claim their shit doesn't stink. I'm not going to let my friend get revictimized by all this.

Bri had roughly about a year to apologize.

Found this on Facebook earlier.

Oh, I love Obvious Plant

The like, few widely circulated pieces of Sai being racist the people who had grudges against her from the SU days really did muddy the waters when we were actively trying to talk to her about the genuine racist comments she'd make-- and I'm going to assume will continue to.

I don't want to accuse everyone who ever reposted that one screenshot from Nug didn't care about racism. I'm pretty sure some of them didn't, but.

-O.W.C.A. requires non-animal employees to take animal sensitivity training

Werewolves are a good time! Minotaurs? Aliens, you can come up with your own special blend of weird! Tentacles for days! Eyes to see you at every angle with! No body! Hive mind! Sea monsters? As long as it's sentient go fuck nasty crazy. I've seen people write hydras, dragons, there was that one where a woman did the do with a moon made of sentient meat. Satyrs? Whatever that dude was from the movie where there was a little kid lamb that was like a whole man with a ram's head. It was like a Satyr reversed. That could be interesting.

Make a Thoseferstu with teeth like a sabercat and three hearts the size of a medium pick up truck. Make a fucking abominable snowman? Name him Roobius, who runs a hot spring?

Get creative! Go to a healthier place. Do some self improvement, holy shit.

We're talking about a person who outright claimed to have fucked a real actual dog and made revenge porn of their ex getting raped by dogs.

Something is WRONG. THAT ISN'T KINK! That isn't fantasy. You're enabling an abuser because you're so insecure about yourself. This isn't about your kink. This isn't about any movement that you're trying to claim it's about. It's not political.

You're insecure.

Because I am a big boy with big boy responsibilities who has been dealing with big boy shit in my own life I've chosen to more so disengage and obstain from saying anything as it pertains to certain parties I used to be involved with-- wishing them absolutely no ill will, just not really interacting anymore. Saying anything at all publically being a sure fire way to get myself dragged into litigating private shit where the peanut gallery can all watch.

But a good friend of mine,

@thetepes

Or "Sheev" has been implicated now. So I'm going to say something at risk of that happening.

To the people in Malcom's server who have heard Sheev is a "tyrant" and that they "can't have a normal conversation when she is around"-- I know exactly which discord users are saying that. And why. And there's a multitude of screenshots (and an ungodly amount of fucking voice memos) that will give *full context* to what actually happened if they keep talking shit.

Including a certain person, in response to sheev explaining to them she's deaf and did not have her hearing aids in after they repeatedly sent her voice memos, saying, direct quote, "you're not really deaf. You just don't want to listen."

All of that shit is still accessible. The fatphobic comments, the abelism. All of it.

You know who you are. Last warning, bud. The fact that you still haven't fucking moved on is pathetic.

SHE GONNA TRY TO CALL MR.KRABS ON ME YALL

my storytelling final! or, that week i almost went blind cross-hatching!

it’s a couple weeks old at this point, but i’m still proud of it (all that cross-hatching…) even though looking back at it now i can see a ton of flaws or things i just could’ve done better. maybe i’ll redo it one day.

the page colors are kind of wonky because they’re photographs; i didn’t have a scanner big enough for the pages.