Exclusive Dumbass Content

Charlie: Fire is hot.

Justin: Fire is hot, that’s a great point. Salient and well-made.

Charlie: [singing] Mister sun, sun! Mister golden sun, please shine down on me!

Justin: Oh, the sun. [Charlie sings the same lines again] What do you think about the sun?

Charlie: It’s shining bright!

Justin: Mm-hmm. When does the sun come out?

Charlie: First–it–lights up the day!

Justin: And when does the moon come out?

Charlie: It’s at night.

Justin: What happens when the moon comes out during the day? [long pause] Now, I noticed you’re balling your fists up. What is that for?

Charlie: [long, high-pitched noise of consideration] Punch it!

Justin: You’re gonna punch the moon. [Charlie: Yeah!] Why?

Charlie: Because we’re knights!

Justin: We’re knights? [Charlie: Yeah.] Okay.

Charlie: Come on, Daddy, let’s fight the moon! [muffling sounds as she gets down]

Justin: Well. Um, I’m not sure we should fight the moon. It’s a very long way away. I’m–would– [Charlie babbles about the moon in the distance] Where’s the moon? Okay, she’s left the room. [Charlie makes punching sound effects in the distance] [Justin starts laughing] Can you punch the moon here, in the room with the microphone?

Charlie: [at a distance] Come on, Mommy!

Justin: Well, I guess that’s gonna do it for us. Um, is there anything else you’d like to say?

Charlie: Um…well. Look! Up there!

Justin: What do you see?

Charlie: On the bookshelf! [Justin: Uh-huh?] Look. There’s a present up there!

Justin: There’s a present up there? I don’t think so.

Charlie: Who is it?

Justin: You’re just…taking your headphones off now. Oh no, they’re falling apart. Okay, well let’s say goodbye. Say “bye-bye, Mommy.”

Charlie: Bye-bye, Mommy.

Sydnee: [at a slight distance] Bye-bye!

Charlie: Uh, that was a great podcast we did! Bye-bye, Daddy!

Justin: [laughing] Bye-bye, Charlie.

i must make…

b e a d l i z a r d

B…

こうなって、こうなった！

“Zira and the Little Fire” is my newest short story featured in the upcoming Monster anthology “Wayward Sisters.”

If you’ve backed the Wayward Sisters Kickstarter THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! You’ll get this comic in full colour as well as a whole bunch of wonderful short stories by amazing creators.

Thanks for your support! This project was a fun and challenging way to flex my writing muscles. I hope you enjoy it :)

If you missed out on the kickstarter, book pre-orders are now available at the link below: