Somewhere In The Sun

If you think about it, he’s one of the few characters in the trilogy who really doesn’t have a loyalty mission of any kind. So many characters in the trilogy rely on Shepard to guide them, mentor them, or aid them in some vital way that affects who they are on the deepest levels. Ashley to a lesser extent, but even Ashley seeks Shepard’s help/comfort to grieve and come to terms with a death in her family. But Kaidan? He asks for Shepard’s help only to understand Shepard’s actions and alliance with Cerberus. That’s so, so powerful to me. He doesn’t want Shepard to help him sort himself out, he want’s Shepard’s help so he can understand Shepard.

Say what you will about that terribly written clusterfuck that is Horizon, but when you strip out all of the badly orchestrated bits, you still have a character whose professional and moral compass doesn’t align with Cerberus, and it’s important enough to him that he’s willing to walk away from Shepard to preserve those core beliefs. So many characters define themselves through Shepard, leaning on them to define or even re-prioritize their own code, but Kaidan doesn’t, and I love that so much. That’s not a knock on those characters at all – I just like that Kaidan is different.

In fact, when it comes to Kaidan and Shepard, to me it’s the reverse. I do a lot of thinking about Shepard and their similarities to Saren. Both of them started from a similar place, after all. Elite soldiers, Spectres, charged with getting their hands dirty to protect the needs of the galaxy. Where Saren went astray was losing his ability to see the people he was protecting as people instead of the ‘ruthless calculus’ that Garrus talks about. Saren allied with Sovereign not because he was an evil asshole, but because he thought it was the best way to save the most people. His intentions started out as true.  When you think of all the decisions Shepard has to make, how easy would it before them to look in the mirror one day and see Saren’s reflection instead of their own? Well, for me, Kaidan is a big piece of why Shepard is able to hold onto their own humanity, to “anthropomorphize” the galaxy, if I may quote my favorite salarian. To me, Kaidan is Shepard’s magnetic north. And that’s my absolute favorite thing about him.

He lets them believe that he’s as good as they are, that he’s whole, even though something bitter inside of him burns and he wonders why.

Every time he makes the right choice, every time he does something kind, every time his friends continue to look at him with pride…he wonders if he’s finally moved on from the burned-out core of him.

Patronus Analysis 021 Black Swan ***Uncommon***

If your patronus is the black Swan then it is likely you are a highly emotional individual. Your passion allows you to devote yourself to your interests and become an expert in your chosen field.

The downside to your passionate existence is that you can sometimes struggle to understand your own emotions. If this is your patronus you will thrive in a warm and friendly atmosphere, you feed off positive energy and give it out just as freely.

enjoy this stupid thing I made to amuse myself

[images: seven gifs of janeway, captioned as follows:

janeway

jane bae

jane gay

jane save the day

jane happy birthday

jane go away

jane we’ll find a way