chasing ā part II (joel x afab!reader)
read part 1 here!
synopsis: although some women threw themselves at joel and failed, one has certainly made her mark. joel briefly loses sights of you and him but fixes it.
warnings: angst angst ANGST but thereās a happy ending <3, established relationship, allusions to smut (minors beware), accusations of cheating, cursing, age gap (reader in late 20ās, joel in late 40ās), jealous!reader, insecure!reader, mean!joel, regretting saying things, fluff!
a/n: RAHHH yalls love and support have been so amazing! i didnāt think itād get that much feedback, but yāall have inspired me to quickly publish the next part for yāall! please let me know what you think and enjoy!!
COME GET YALLS JUICE
based on chasing_demo by nf
Somewhere I can be loved
Where I don't have to run away from my flaws
And I don't have to be afraid of my thoughts
With this high, this high that I've been chasing
you had severely fucked up. yes, joel called you childish, but he hadnāt meant it the way you took it as. it was ironic how youād reassure joel about yāallās age gap but allowed it to control your behavior earlier.
your boot kicked into the dirt beneath it while a grunt of frustration came from your throat. āGod dammit!ā one hand rested on your hip while the other held your forehead. at the moment, you couldnāt understand the underlying cause of your intense feelings. all you knew was that something was off about jenny, even if no one else saw it. there was just this⦠feeling you got from her.
to spare yourself further embarrassment from those passing by or shamelessly watching, you turned and walked towards the stables. you still had patrol with him despite yāallās argument, so you had no choice but to grab june from her stall. what you hadnāt expected was to see jenny brushing your horseās coat.
āOhā! Hey, (Y/N)! Joel told me to get a horse, so I was about to take this one. I saw Joel riding this one and how tame it was.ā jenny spoke with a soft smile upon her face as she continued to groom june. āYou canāt take this one.ā you grabbed ahold on juneās lead and gently pulled her in your direction. āIs she hurt? I didnāt see her get any injuries during our patrol yesterday, so she should be fine to ride, right?ā you stayed silent, which didnāt go unnoticed to jenny. she didnāt take too kindly to that and sighed before breaking the silence. āLook, Joel asked me to go on patrol with him today, so I reallyāā āHe what?!ā your head snapped towards the gorgeous woman as your brows furrowed.
āJesus fucking Christā first, you want my boyfriend, now you want my fucking horse? I said no. You cannot take my damn horse, now get your hands off of her.ā you seethed with pure anger at the girl. You hadnāt realized how long the two of you had been there when you heard your name being roughly called behind you. joel mustāve came to see what was taking jenny so long with grabbing a horse that he had seen your outburst. āJenny, Iāll bring you a horse and meet you at the gate.ā joelās eyes stayed glued to your face, his arms crossed over his chest. āJoel, honestly itās fineāā joel cut jenny off before she could finish, āNo, itās not fine. Go.ā jenny so slightly jolted at his tone before walking out while giving joel an apologetic look.
after a few long seconds passed and joel was sure she was out of earshot, his nostrils flared. āI donāt know what the fuck your problem is, but you will not treat her that way.ā you werenāt sure why joel was so adamant on defending her, and your confusion showed in your demeanor. your body recoiled away from the tone he was speaking to you with. āAre you serious right now?ā you scoffed and narrowed your eyes at the man in front of you.
āShe just got here and youāre treating her like shit. As far as I know, that girl hasnāt done a thing to you for you to be acting like this.ā he had a point. although she hadnāt directly done anything towards you, you still didnāt feel comfortable with how close she had gotten to him. āWhy are you fighting so hard for her? God, if you defend her any harder, Iād think you fucking liked her.ā joel wasnāt too fond of how jealous you were acting when in reality, it was fear.
āAre you hearing how you sound right now? I donāt know why youāre being so insecure, but itās making you disgustingly possessive and itās extremely unattractive.ā your face contorted into something else, something softer. that familiar burn began to sting behind the bridge of your nose as you looked at joel. āYou donāt mean that..ā the last thing you wanted was to be clingy and possessive. sure, you knew you were territorial, but you didnāt expect it to get this out-of-hand.
āYou know Iāve never given you shit about your age, but I didnāt expect you to be this immature about me having another female friend.ā your bottom lip began to tighten and quiver from his verbal assault. heās never spoken to you quite like this, especially ripping into one of your biggest insecurities in yāallās relationship.
after a few minutes of silence, a few fat, hot tears trailed down your cheeks. āYou know what?ā you wiped your nose with your sleeve (actually joelās, it was a flannel he gave you) and sniffled, āYouāre absolutely right. Iām very sorry that I treated your friend like that.ā you nodded with slight disbelief and disappointment before raising your brows and planting a fake smile upon your lips. āIn fact, she can take my horse since it matters that much to you. Whatās mine is hers, youāve made that abundantly clear.ā before joel could hurdle another hurtful comment your way, you roughly brushed past him and fled from the uncomfortable space.
when the outbreak happened, you were essentially alone from the start. as an eight year old girl, you were extremely scared to have been pushed onto a crowded bus with your parents. yāall were in a very unorganized community, but it was shelter none the less. when FEDRA raided it, you were fourteen. your father was quick to defend you and your mother from their harsh grips upon yāallās skin. despite his effort, a FEDRA soldier wasted no time with putting a bullet in his head.
your mother died when you were nineteen. if you had to explain her cause of death, youād say it was from a broken heart. maybe it was from the never-ending hopelessness that FEDRA constantly served their ācitizensā, or maybe it was the exhaustion of having to keep going, to keep trying. all you knew was that you couldnāt stay at the shitty QZ anymore, you had to leave if you wanted to survive.
the night after your mother passed, you packed all of your essentials as well as weapons that you had traded for some rations and alcohol your mother had fermented (she would use whatever extra bread and fruit you guys had to make it). with your rifle slung over your back and a pistol shoved in an old leather holster upon your belt, you snuck out of the QZ and become a lone wolf.
after years of trial and error and dropping bodies, you finally came across joel at the ripe age of 24. you had your fair share of shitty groups that tried to backstab you (a few had succeeded), so you were not fond of the idea of him. with the barrel of your pistol pointed towards his figure, you saw his hands raise in the air in defense (knowing joel now, you know he wouldnāt have done that if he had been alone). behind him appeared a frightened girl that stood frozen with fear.
you remembered the first time he confessed any sort of affectionate feelings towards you. it was almost a year after initially meeting. you had been rushed by a clicker, and lo and behold, your pistol was jammed. joel was quick enough to lay a fat shotgun shell into its head before roughly yanking your body up. his arms had wrapped around your body as he reassured you with loving words.
ļæ¼that was three years ago. now, you were on the verge of losing the man that had grown to open up to you and become vulnerable with.




















