âŚthereâs specific pony bead beady creature string? Specifically to make those keychains and stuff? Wow where have I been?
My guess is that it originated in Vacation Bible School sales things and then moseyed over to the regular craft. I donât know, I have never done VBS (I have worked in a craft store where VBS supplies exploded and took over like 1/4 of the front sales floor. It was weirdly fascinating).
No, I come from the land of âwhatever skein of yarn you have on hand worksâ and âoh hey we have that weird plastic we make the spiral keychain things withâ as what to use when making beaded creatures.
I havenât made any beaded creatures inâŚyears.
I think the last time I made one, Jamie and I hadnât gotten the house yet (so thatâs beenâŚlemme pull up the calculatorâŚfactor in the inbetweenâŚ19 years ago. Damn.). I remember making a lot of dragonflies. I like dragonflies.
I wonder if I can remember how to do it. Iâve got beads (I always have beads of some sort)
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I understand why optimization culture has boomed so hard in the past several years.
Something big happened that most of us could do very little about. The world became openly unstable in ways people could no longer politely ignore. Institutions failed. Safety nets frayed. The future got harder to imagine. So a lot of people started reaching for control wherever they could find it: morning routines, dopamine detoxes, habit stacks, sleep scores, screen-time limits, supplement protocols, productivity systems, ânervous system regulation,â whatever the app-store priesthood was selling that week.
I get it. I really do.
But Iâm going to pull a phrase people love to use when they want to sound emotionally mature: trauma explains behavior; it does not excuse it.
Because at some point, âI am trying to regain a sense of agency in a chaotic worldâ turned into âeveryone who doesnât live like me is undisciplined, addicted, immature, morally weak, spiritually degraded, or secretly begging to be rescued from themselves.â
And thatâs where I get off the ride.
Iâm not saying optimization is bad for everyone. Some people genuinely benefit from tweaking parts of their lives. Some people like routines. Some people feel better with stricter sleep schedules or less social media or more deliberate habits. Great. Wonderful. Iâm sincerely glad when people find something that makes their life easier.
The problem is the culture around it.
The culture is ableist because it treats âfunctioningâ as a moral achievement and assumes everyone has the same body, brain, energy, pain level, sensory needs, executive function, and recovery capacity.
It is classist because so much of it quietly depends on flexible schedules, disposable income, safe housing, nutritious food access, leisure time, privacy, and the ability to refuse exploitative work conditions without immediately risking survival.
And it is Puritanical because underneath all the soft wellness language is the same old suspicion of pleasure: too much comfort will rot you, too much rest will weaken you, too much fun will corrupt you, too much convenience will make you less human. You are always supposed to be renouncing something. You are always supposed to be proving that you can suffer correctly.
Thatâs the part that bothers me.
Not âI tried changing this habit and it helped me.â
Not âI personally feel better when I do less of that.â
But the constant creep from personal preference into moral hierarchy. The assumption that a âbetterâ life is always a more controlled life. The belief that every impulse must be interrogated, every pleasure audited, every habit optimized, every moment made legible to some invisible performance review.
And honestly, I think a lot of people would rather accuse everyone else of being addicted, lazy, dysregulated, or broken than admit how scared they are of being alive in a world where control is often partial, fragile, and unevenly distributed.
By all means, arrange your life in ways that help you. But the second your coping mechanism turns into a cudgel against people with different needs, different limits, different joys, different bodies, different schedules, different resources, or different definitions of a life worth living, it stops being self-improvement and starts being social pressure.
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Mitch McConnell has been sent to a nice farm out in the country where there's lots of open space to run around and lots of other senators for him to play with
i'd rather not ask for this rn but i don't have much choice sadly. due to circumstances in my family (vet bills, disabled uncle who is dying, and car troubles) i'm essentially skint. i'm in my overdraft and have to somehow manage for the next two weeks before i'm paid. i don't want to ask but fuck my pride.
if any of ya'll have anything to spare and it won't put you out i will be beyond thankful and appreciative if ya'll could help me out rn.
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The duct tape holding the putty on has turned into a swampy goo. The bucket, which has been Bone Dry since the putty duct tape installment has nasty ass water in it (it lives there for this reason). The other day I heard drip drip drip and then Jamie did something and I heard drip drip spoosh.
Pulling the slowly liquefying duct tape off the pipe (at the time it was âbandaid it weâll get to it and the object permanence and life happened) and pulling the ubend off I found the problem.
Straws. There are straws all up in the ubend.
And one singular small popsicle stick.
Straws.
Now the bucket of gross water stays for the next two hours while the gorilla glue goo cures enough for me to move the pan with water so I can dump the drink out and see where else it may be leaking.
Even my âmostly no sense of smellâ couldnât save me from this.
Noodle is fascinated and intrigued, I am just glad Iâve got to clean the fridge out so the Walmart bag of gross paper towels, duct tape putty pieces, and gloves wonât fester for too much longer in the trash bag inside.
Ok but picture the ultimate girl dad!Bucky with his daughters. Like the whole family is just having a movie day or something. One of his girls is curled up next to him, another is doing his hair, and if we're feeling frisky, the rest are just bumbling around him going "look at this daddy", "daddy let me cuddle too", etc. Bucky Barnes was made for little girls!!
oh, so i cried. cool cool coolio for sureeeee
--------
The living room is a mess.
Blankets are everywhereâhalf draped over the couch, half trailing onto the floor. Popcorn litters the coffee table, along with three different juice boxes (only one of them actually finished) and a scattering of tiny plastic tiaras that somehow made their way into the movie setup. The TV hums softly in the background, some animated movie playing that no one is fully paying attention to anymore.
Bucky Barnes sits in the center of it all like the calm in a storm.
Or⌠well. As calm as he can be.
âDaddy, donât move,â Maisie insists, her small fingers carefully separating a section of his hair. Sheâs perched behind him on the back of the couch, tongue poking out in concentration as she attempts what she proudly declared was going to be âa braid like Elsa.â
âYes, maâam,â Bucky murmurs, perfectly still despite the slight tugging.
On his right side, curled into him like she belongs there, is Lila. Sheâs tucked against his flesh arm, her cheek pressed to his chest, thumb absentmindedly brushing along the seam of his shirt. Her legs are thrown over his lap, fully claiming him as her personal pillow.
âIâm comfy,â she mumbles, already half-asleep.
âYou look comfy, bug,â he says softly, dipping his head just enough to press a kiss to her hairâcareful not to disrupt Maisieâs âmasterpiece.â
That lasts all of three seconds.
âDaddy!â
Bucky barely has time to react before something collides into his left sideâhard.
âOofââ His vibranium arm comes up instinctively, steadying the small body now attempting to climb him like heâs a jungle gym.
âLook what I made!â Nora announces proudly, shoving a slightly crumpled drawing directly into his line of sight.
He shifts just enough to see it without disturbing the rest of his very delicate situation.
Itâs⌠colorful.
Very colorful.
Thereâs a stick figure with long hair (you), a bigger one with a square torso (him, he assumes), and four smaller figures scattered around. One of them appears to have wings.
âIs that me?â he asks, tapping the larger figure.
Nora beams. âYeah! And thatâs you tooââ she points to another one. âBut thatâs you when youâre a superhero.â
âAh,â he nods solemnly. âI can tell by the⌠wings.â
âTheyâre not wings,â she says, scandalized. âThatâs your metal arm.â
âOf course it is,â Bucky corrects immediately. âHow could I miss that?â
Satisfied, Nora scrambles into his lapâwell, what little lap space remains between her and Lila.
âDaddy, I wanna cuddle too.â
âCâmere, sweetheart.â He shifts carefully, adjusting his legs so she can wedge herself in without knocking Lila off entirely.
Behind him, Maisie groans. âDaddy, you moved!â
âSorry, sweetheart,â he says, freezing again mid-adjustment. âWonât happen again.â
âThat braid better be worth it,â you murmur from where youâre sitting cross-legged on the floor, trying (and failing) not to laugh.
Bucky shoots you a look that says help me, but thereâs no real distress behind it. His eyes are soft, warm, glowing in that way they only ever do when heâs surrounded like this.
When heâs theirs.
âDaddy!â
Another voice this timeâEllieâcoming in at full speed from the hallway. Sheâs clutching a stuffed bunny in one hand and something shiny in the other.
âI found this!â she declares, climbing onto the armrest next to him.
âWhatâd you find, El?â he asks, shifting his vibranium hand to steady her before she can topple over.
âItâs your dog tags!â she says, dangling them in front of his face.
His chest tightens for half a secondâold memories, old weightâbut it melts just as quickly when she beams at him like sheâs discovered treasure.
âYou wanna wear them?â he asks gently.
Her eyes go wide. âReally?â
âReally.â
He carefully lifts them over his head, placing them around her neck. They hang comically low, nearly to her stomach, but she doesnât care.
âIâm just like you!â she announces proudly.
âYeah, you are,â he says softly, brushing his thumb over her cheek.
Now there are four of them on him.
Maisie behind him, still braiding with fierce determination.
Lila half-asleep against his chest.
Nora sprawled across his lap, holding her drawing like itâs sacred.
Ellie perched beside him, dog tags clinking as she wiggles with excitement.
And thenâ
âDaddy, I wanna sit too!â
The smallest voice yet.
She toddles over with unsteady steps, dragging a blanket behind her like a royal train. Her curls are a mess, her pajama top twisted, and her lip slightly stuck out in a pout.
âThereâs no room,â she declares, deeply offended.
Bucky exhales a quiet laugh.
âCâmere, Pip.â
He somehow shifts again, making space by pulling her up onto his chest, right above Lila.
âThere we go,â he murmurs, settling her carefully so she doesnât squish her sister.
Piper immediately melts into him, tiny hands fisting in his shirt.
âAll my girls,â he murmurs under his breath.
You catch it.
Of course you do.
Your heart does that soft, aching thing it always does when he says stuff like thatâlike he still canât believe this is his life. Like heâs still waiting for it to disappear.
It wonât.
Not this.
Not the way Maisie proudly announces, âDaddy, Iâm done!â and holds up what can only be described as the most chaotic braid youâve ever seen.
Not the way Nora immediately demands, âCan I do the other side?â
Not the way Ellie leans into him, whispering, âI love you, Daddy.â
Not the way Piper is already snoring softly against his chest.
Not the way Lila sleepily murmurs, âBest movie day ever.â
Bucky just sits there in the middle of it allâhair half-braided, arms full, heart fullerâlooking like a man who was carved from war but somehow remade for this.
For them.
For five little girls who see him not as something broken or dangerous, but as theirs.
âLove you too, doll,â he murmurs quietly, not even sure which one heâs answering.
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