For when the whump ideas in my head need to LEAVE

They haven’t been deployed in long enough that his muscles resist when he tries to force a smile. He hasn’t interacted with anyone other than a handler in what feels like an eternity. Knowing that they’ve been transferred and deployed and changed handler still hasn’t registered.

At least he was able to tell the others to brace themselves for the news, he had just been handed paperwork to fill out.

They sound excited, hopeful in the way that always twists his insides. He can never get himself to nip it and then… the mission lasts a bit too long or the client is a bit too nice, and he’s forced to turn to harsher methods.

Putting him in charge is probably supposed to help – not allowing the others to get bad habits when talking to officers, leaving him pretend in front of clients. He’s the only one who won’t forget it’s only pretend – will always only ever be pretend.

He’s ready when the truck stops, smile in place – eyes creased and shoulders relaxed and everything.

The man who opens the truck is young. Not younger than the team’s youngest but young enough to give him pause. His nerves seem to ease when he notices Zero’s smile.

“Commander Zero, right? Welcome!”

He looks friendly enough, for a client. It’s possible he’s not even one; maybe they were paid for by his parents, for whatever project he seems to have. Maybe it’s just a façade, but Zero imagines he’s the type to treat them as people – most of the time, anyway. There’s no way to avoid the occasional remark, especially during maintenance. Or maybe he’ll leave that to someone else?

The man looks curious as he peers into the truck, eyes scanning Zero’s teammates. They know better than to react – he’s taught them not to react – but the man still offers a wave.

“Right, should I let you unpack? Would it be alright if Laura – she’s right there – showed your team around while you and I talked a bit?”

He cups the back of his neck as if embarrassed.

“It’s… I don’t know how much you remember or know about our initiative, so I’d just like to make sure we all… have the same bases.”

“Of course, sir.”

The smile turns into a grimace. The man raises both hands in an obvious stop motion, cringing.

“James is fine. We’ll… talk about that but…yeah. No need for sir. I get that habits die hard but… Really. James. James is fine.”

Zero nods without a thought. The rest of the team will enjoy that, and it’s usually a good sign.

“We’ll do our best, James.”

James inhales deeply, nodding. “Right.”

He looks around and begins to walk, Zero in step behind him. It doesn’t look like a very large base: a few buildings that aren’t very tall, a sad courtyard. It’s not fenced off but he notices cameras around them. A few cars are parked near the entrance, and Zero notes that they won’t be working here alone.

“So,” the client looks back at him to speak, and Zero takes it as a sign that the man expects eye-contact from them. “I…We’re trying to become something of a… team. A group people could call for help solving any issues they have.”

Zero nods, humouring the client’s desire for a conversation partner.

“I understand, James. Mercenaries.”

“No! Not that,” the man stops, turning around completely, “not mercenaries. It wouldn’t be for money, it’d be…. To help people.”

“Like a militia, James?”

“Not exactly…” They stop in front of a door and James open it, gesturing for him to get inside. “Like… I mean… You know.”

Zero pauses at the threshold, making sure to look at their new client. He, in fact, does not know. The man looks away, a slight blush on his cheeks.

“Like… heroes.”

“Understood, James.”

He steps inside then, not reacting to the client’s awkward chuckle. He steps into a sparsely decorated office with a few boxes to unpack stacked in the corner. The light switch doesn’t work and James hurries to the desk to turn on a small light.

“Sorry, this is all very new…” he gives an awkward smile, “but the dorms are fully done, don’t worry! The training hall, as well.”

He sits down, bending down to look for something in the drawers. Zero continues to scan the room, waiting for him to continue. It’s not a very large office and the many accessories scattered around make it feel almost cramped – to stand in front of the desk, Zero endures the poking of a plant’s leaves.

James straightens up, setting a box down on the desk.

“The thing is… Me and my team have the abilities.” Another awkward smile. “Technically. We’ve never actually… gone out, so there are some things we don’t really… we need some help with.”

He fiddles with the box’s lock for a bit, sighing softly before starting to move around the papers on the desk. He’s looking for something but continues speaking to Zero.

“You’re here for that. Some… friends,” there’s something bitter there, but James makes sure to look up to give Zero a smile, so he only notes it’s a topic to avoid, “recommended your team. Or, well, your company but… you know.”

He doesn’t know this, either.

“You’re here to, let's say, show us the ropes? Like… I’m not quite sure, but… ideally to help consolidate our skills, to accompany us on our first missions, help things go smoothly…”

Zero hadn’t known that. He nods, almost relieved. As long as James and his team do have the skills they say they have, things should be easy enough. Depending on the missions they take on, there probably won’t be too much resistance from the numbers either – if the client is sincere about wanting to help people.

Zero is used to dealing with trainees; he’s not an instructor, but he’s coached other weapons before – it shouldn’t be too hard with a client.

“We’re also hoping to use your image a bit…” the man sounds sheepish again, “People like our enthusiasm but we don’t really- we don’t have anything to show yet. You’re experienced… having you join the group is helpful.”

Having a client explains in such details what is expected of them is pretty nice, he can admit. It’s still not much, but it’s enough that Zero thinks he won’t have to snoop around for their contract.

“I understand, James. We are grateful for your explanation. This seems very doable.” He forces a smile, trying to meet the client’s energy.

James smiles back, standing up. He has the box in his hands, a post-it stuck on top of it.

“This is for you and the team. Badges for everyone, keys to the lockers et cetera. Your names didn’t appear in the contract, so we used your personnel numbers – hope that’s okay. You can…” he waves a hand around, “scratch them out and correct them, if you want.”

“…Thank you, James.”

Zero grabs the box. The idea of having a badge feels…. Bizarre. Not everyone can set up the kind of systems they have on base but letting them roam – practically – freely is unheard of. But then, the privileged is anchored to a physical item that is easily removed, so maybe they’re just starting on James’s good side.

He considers asking the consequences of losing one of those – to know if he’ll warn the others or just keep track himself – but stops himself. It feels a bit too much like provocation: losing it? When he received the box only a few breaths ago?

“…Should I head to the dorms, James?”

James pulls a small key from his pocket and hands it to him, apologising for the lack of key-chain.

“I’ll show you the way to your room. You can explore tomorrow, if you want – or Laura probably gave your team a tour.”

Zero walks in front of James for all of the twelve steps it takes to leave the office, and then naturally falls in step behind him, keeping the man in sight.

The rooms aren’t that far, but Zero is surprised to enter an empty room. He can hear the others, but the room only has a single set of furniture. He scans the room, hoping for another door.

“James?”

“The others share a room further down the hall. We thought everyone would be more comfortable if you slept in a different room? Since you’re in charge and everything. That’s what we did for our team.” He bites his lips, “and since more people will want to see you – there are things I haven’t explained yet – we just thought it’d be easier.”

Zero stills. He thanks James for the explanation automatically, mind whirring. Being alone is not ideal. He’ll lose a lot of time catching up with the others. It won’t be as easy – won’t appear so natural – to intervene. Still, he’s close enough – he’ll find something.

“I’ll let you settle down, then? See you at dinner.”

“Yes, James.”