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One is Will Graham.

The other is pregnant individuals.

So I like to think Will learns about the second category on a random day.

Will: So, the woman from the cash register was quite rude, wasn't she?

Hannibal: Very.

Will: What's to be done about it?

Hannibal: Nothing.

Will: She called you an asshole.

Hannibal: you often do too, Will. And I'm not eating you for that

Will: I say it lovingly. Besides, I have immunity, you like me when I'm rude.

Hannibal: That's right, you and the pregnant individuals have immunity.

Will: Was she pregnant?

Hannibal: Mhm.

Will: Oh. So that's your limit. Me and the mommies.

Hannibal: Will please-

Will: shouldn't they be like kinder eggs for you-

Hannibal looked around. They were in the middle of a field. There was no "in". Will held his hand again as if he needed help to come "in".

"I'm sorry, Will, I fail to understand what is going on."

"Come on." He said as he pulled his hand. "Don't you like it?"

"The view is beautiful." Hannibal replied, a little bit concerned with Will's sanity. The place was indeed beautiful, especially now when the sun was setting behind the peaks of the mountains.

"There is a lake nearby. Great for fishing."

Will's hand was still holding his tightly and the gleam in his eyes was magnificent. His enthusiasm made Hannibal smile even though he couldn't figure out the reason. Will was absolutely seeing something he couldn't.

"Dearest, what are you looking at? What are we looking at?"

"You don't see it?" Will asked as he gestured with his other hand as if there was something obvious Hannibal was too blind to see.

"I'm afraid I don't. Where are we?"

"Right now? Give me a second." He said as he looked around as if he was trying to find something. "We are in your new kitchen." He replied with a genuine affection in his voice.

Hannibal blinked a few times, even more confused than before.

"We are in the middle of a field. Are you seeing a kitchen, Will?" He asked and Will laughed loudly.

"You will see it too, dumbass. You just need a bit of perspective." He explained. "This" he started and looked at the whole field "is where we will build our first home together. This is what I wanted for both of us."

"Will..." Hannibal murmured as he was finally seeing it all, as if the fog was lifted. The walls, the corridors, the kitchen, their bedroom. A living room where he could place his piano. A little garden. A little shed where Will could keep his boat engines.

He held onto Will's hand as if it was an anchor.

"Do you like it?" Will asked as he watched all the emotions wash over Hannibal's expression.

They wouldn't know from the start but Hannibal would keep telling Will that they should be more involved in the community lif e therefore he makes cookies and encourages Will to knock on their door.

When Will comes back his expression is impossible to read.

"Well?" Hannibal inquires.

"Yeah, they were quite surprised. They didn't expect me."

"I need to know if they will be our next dinner or if they are nice people."

"That really depends. They are lesbians, they even have a kid."

"Oh. We appreciate diversity."

"We do, yeah, it's not really that much diversity in this case though. Not more than in Baltimore."

"What do you mean, Will?"

"I'm saying, these lesbians next door, you slept with one, I slept with the other."

"No."

"Yes."

"No way."

"Mhm."

"How?"

Hannibal is not really a fan. He loves swimming but in pools where he can see what lives beneath him. As a predator himself, he needs to be constantly aware of his surroundings and asses the potential harm. Will tells him every night about the many types of fish he has seen that day.

One day however Will convinces him to come into the water. He promises him there is nothing to be afraid of, there are only harmless fish. Hannibal gives in.

The water is nice. And clear enough. And Will promises to report every weird thing he sees beneath them. They don't go where they can't touch the bottom.

"I have to admit, Will, it's not that bad."

Will doesn't reply but takes off his snorkeling glasses.

"What else is there?" Hannibal asks seeing the mixed feelings on Will's face.

"Nothing. A couple of fish."

"Will. What did you see."

"Just don't move, okay?"

Hannibal is frozen instantly. Him, the apex predator, is facing a potential death threat and he doesn't even know what it is.

"You promised." He whispers as a small grin appears on Will's face.

"I promised nothing will harm you underwater. I never made any promises about myself though."

Before Hannibal can react, Will has already "attacked" him, pulling him underneath. Now that his attacker has made himself known, Hannibal has no issue with fighting back, especially because it's the idiot that he had fallen for.

At least their little fight had for sure scared any underwater predator.

By the end of the day they are both cuddling in their bed, Will's head resting on Hannibal's chest.

"By the way, there was a moray eel right next to your left foot. I attacked you to scare it away. Did you know they have really bad eyesight and-"

"Are you telling me this just now?"

"You would have freaked out and where would that have led? You are okay, aren't you?"

"I could have been dead by now."

"No way. Do you think I would have let that happen on my watch? I would have killed it with my bare hands and then I would have cooked it for you."

a pirate, a serial killer and a demon walk into a bar after a break up

—

will:

hannibal: remember when I burned someone you cared about alive and convinced you you killed a bunch of people and shoved the ear of our surrogate daughter down your throat and messed with your fishing lures and got you put in prison for my crimes? :)

will:

hannibal: remember when I killed your good friend and displayed her in little slices and sent someone to kill you and got your biological child aborted then symbolically aborted the surrogate daughter you already thought was dead but you got to see alive for 5 seconds before I slit her throat and made sure she bled on your face after gutting you and blaming you? :)

will:

hannibal: remember when I gave your escape plane ticket away to someone and tried to replace you with someone I don't love at all and then sliced your head open because you are my most specialist boy and I just *had* to eat you because I love you? :)

will:

hannibal: remember when I just had to have you and no one else could so I sent a serial killer to kill your wife and child because why not make it three for three in killing your children? :)

will:

hannibal: good times :)

will: remember when I said I'd miss my dogs but not you