Akanori

🫧gregor has such atrocious self-esteem that you are undoubtedly going to have to be the one to take the first real step. he's fond of you in a way that he isn't with the other sinners, in a way that he usually isn't with anybody (at least that's gone anywhere), but he has no intentions of acting on it because he can't fathom the idea of you returning his feelings

🫧you have to take things slow with gregor. he'll come around eventually, but much more subtle, fleeting forms of affection are best at first-- even if they leave him longing for more. your hand brushing his as you walk, or your pinkies briefly linking. the first time you kiss him on the cheek, he turns bright red and chokes on the smoke from the cigarette he'd been puffing on. once you slowly warm him up to it, he really likes to drape his arm over your shoulders or even let you lean your head against him. he still greatly prefers to see you coming, so no bear hugs from behind or anything of that sort, but he doesn't mind you initiating a loose hug every now and then, though he probably won't. he's usually either the little spoon, or you can sleep with your head on his chest. the arm makes cuddling a bit of a process to get used to, once he finally works up to the point of being able to sleep in the same bed

🫧speaking of the arm, just don't bring it up unless he does first. he typically chooses to either ignore it in a form of faux acceptance. it's not like you're walking on eggshells or anything, but you regarding it with neutrality is the best thing for him; it's there and there's no purpose in pretending it isn't, but pointing it out doesn't help either.

🫧gregor can yap, but he's also a good person to seek out when you need to talk. he offers you a safe place to just vent, and if you really want advice he can try... or direct you to someone who might be able to actually help. either way, you're pretty safe from judgement with him. he cares for you, and he wants to be there in any way he can. it feels reciprocal to him in a way; he'll always feel like he needs to pay you back in some way for simply being with him

🫧definitely a quality time sort of guy. he doesn’t care what the two of you do, but he really just likes to have some chill alone time to just be. grab some takeout, a pack of cigarettes, listen to his stories and tell him yours. he'll be the happiest bug in the city.

🫧he craves a normal life, or whatever version of that he could have in the city. he knows that he could, potentially, find that with you... but he also worries that he'll prevent you from having it. the stares, the constant reminders of the war, the fact that at any time his arm could react and hurt you. gregor feels like he's just dragging you down with him

🫧i touched on this in the poly headcanons but i can't see gregor using many petnames, aside from the occasional "liebling" or "babe" when it's just the two of you. not picky about what you call him! honestly kind of flattered to get called by terms of endearment at all

Fine arts have been beating my ass lately, to cope I drew a war veteran feeling the same.

when you joined the agency, it wasn’t because you believed things would change. it was because, for the first time, someone said your ability didn’t make you disposable. just… careful.

and then there was him.

fukuzawa.

he didn’t treat you like something fragile, and he didn’t treat you like something dangerous either. he treated you like something that simply existed, and therefore deserved space to learn how to exist better.

at first, you avoided even his presence out of habit. your eyes stayed lowered, voice steady but small, movements precise in that practiced way of someone who had learned how not to be seen too much.

he noticed. of course he did.

but he never forced you to change. he never asked “why won’t you look at me” like it was a question that needed fixing. instead, he simply spoke to you like you were already part of the room.

“you may sit here.”

“take your time.”

“that is sufficient for today.”

words that didn’t demand anything from you except presence.

slowly, things shifted.

not all at once. not in some dramatic moment of courage or breakthrough. it was quieter than that.

it was paperwork shared in the same room where nothing bad happened when your eyes accidentally drifted too high. it was conversations where you realized you could listen without bracing for impact. it was the strange, unfamiliar absence of fear that made you unsure what to do with your hands.

you still didn’t look at people.

not fully. not yet.

but one afternoon, while working beside him, a file slipped from your hands and landed near his desk. you moved immediately to retrieve it, eyes instinctively fixed downward, body already preparing to minimize your presence even in this small moment.

“wait,” he said.

you stopped.

not because you were afraid. because something in his voice asked you to.

“look at me,” he added gently.

your breath caught.

for a second, you considered refusing, not out of defiance, but out of muscle memory. out of years of survival.

but then you did it.

you lifted your gaze.

just enough, just long enough to meet his eyes.

and nothing happened.

no rupture. no pain. no consequence. no collapse of the world around you.

only stillness.

only him, looking back without hesitation.

your fingers tightened slightly around the file as your mind struggled to reconcile what your body already knew: you were safe in this moment.

he didn’t ask you to hold the gaze. he didn’t push further. he simply let it exist.

“it is alright,” he said quietly.

and for some reason, that was what made your throat tighten.

because it wasn’t permission to do something impossible.

it was permission to stop believing it was impossible at all.

after that, you didn’t change overnight.

but you changed.

small moments. brief glances. seconds where your eyes didn’t immediately drop away from the world. learning that looking at someone didn’t always mean danger. sometimes it just meant connection.

and each time you faltered, he remained the same—steady, unchanging, present in a way that never demanded more than you could give.

one evening, as the day wound down, you spoke without thinking too hard about it.

“i think… i can try more,” you admitted softly.

he looked at you for a moment.

then nodded once.

“good,” he said. “there is no rush.”

and for the first time, the idea of looking up didn’t feel like a risk you had to survive.

it felt like something you might one day simply do.

ᝰ.ᐟ OSAMUSLVT | m.list • taglist • rules

❥ TAGLIST: @willowbsd , @akutagawascoathanger , @xostrawberrylaufeyxo , @peanut_butter_pancakez , @paprikamuncher , @asakarai , @lalalaloveallmydays , @dazaisbaldspot , @bubbleteaandboba , @ivytheweeaboo , @kpopmultistans , @cookies-muncher , @V4mp1reb4tzz , @jqsjournal , @cinnibunnnsposts , @orchiidheart , @blizzyblitz , @mswolf8129 , @secretlyasnail

over time, your purring simply becomes something he quietly treasures - a soft background hum oddly grounding to listen to whenever his thoughts drift too far. and though he’d never ask for it outright, yi sang gradually finds himself lingering closer beside you in hopes of hearing it again.

➤ FAUST ❝ an intriguing phenomenon. faust was previously unaware a human could vocalize in such a manner. ❞

faust’s reaction is less surprise and more immediate analysis.

rather than making a significant deal out of your. . . purring, she instead focuses on understanding how exactly you’re capable of producing such an unusual vocalization - especially considering no ordinary human should realistically be able to replicate a sound of that nature so naturally.

once she reaches a satisfactory conclusion, however, faust quickly relegates it into the category of harmless background noise and moves on without much further fuss.

➤ DON QUIXOTE ❝ most marvelous ! thou soundeth akin to a contented feline creature !! ❞

needless to say, she’s absolutely fascinated.

don quixote reacts as if you’d just unveiled some legendary hidden technique spoken of only in ancient tales, eyes practically sparkling with excitement the moment she hears the sound.

before long, she’s already asking you to do it again. and again. and perhaps one more time for confirmation.

whether you indulge her curiosity or refuse outright, the aftermath usually consists of don attempting to mimic the sound herself - with results ranging from terribly inaccurate to outright concerning.

➤ RYOSHU ❝ hmph. C.L. ❞

initially raises a brow, briefly wondering whether the sound had simply come from elsewhere before realizing it originated from you.

while she’d never openly admit it in plain terms, she does find the trait aesthetically appealing in its own strange way. enough to occasionally give your head a brief stroke if the mood strikes her.

unsurprisingly, she also ends up assigning you some cryptic cat-related nickname afterward and continues using it whenever referring to you.

➤ MEURSAULT ❝ empirical observation: you emit such sound 4.7 times per minute during affection, ±0.3 with hand placement. ❞

maybe he offers a short observation regarding the unusual sound. maybe not. either way, meursault ultimately treats the matter with the same level of neutrality he approaches most things with.

that said, due to his remarkably precise memory. should any of the sinners ever question when, why or under what conditions you tend to purr, meursault is capable of answering almost immediately - often with enough accuracy to make it seem as though he’d been silently documenting your behavior for research purposes all along.

➤ HONG LU ❝ ah, there’s that lovely sound again. ❞

he reacts rather similarly to don quixote, albeit far less explosively energetic about it.

and instead of confusion, hong lu accepts your purring surprisingly naturally. if anything, he seems amused and charmed by it more than anything else.

before long, he starts subtly encouraging the behavior too; resting beside you more often, absentmindedly playing with your hair, or speaking in that soft, gentle tone of his simply because he enjoys hearing the sound return afterward.

➤ HEATHCLIFF ❝ oi, knock it off already. ❞

definitely throws him off here and there at first, though heathcliff eventually reaches a point where he simply accepts it as another one of your strange little harmless habits, especially compared to the several far more concerning habits possessed by the rest of his colleagues aboard the bus.

that said, he still gets visibly flustered whenever you start purring because of him specifically. every single time. he’ll grumble and tell you to quit it already, regardless of whether he actually dislikes the sound or not.

➤ ISHMAEL ❝ wait, seriously ? humans can actually do that ? ❞

looks around. stares at you. then glances around the surroundings once more before narrowing her eyes at you again - visibly trying to process and confirm what exactly she’d just heard.

once she realizes the sound is genuinely, really, truly coming from you; however, her confusion gradually melts into reluctant fondness alongside a noticeable hint of bewilderment.

although she’d never openly make a huge fuss over it, she does slowly begin associating your purring with quieter, safer moments aboard the bus. maybe even coupled with a faint smile of hers that ishmael herself isn’t aware of.

➤ RODION ❝ aww, there it is again~ c’mon, lemme hear it one more time ! ❞

absolutely adores it from the very start.

the second rodion realizes you tend to purr whenever comfortable or affectionate, she immediately starts trying to coax the sound out of you on purpose - especially whenever she has nothing better to do. this usually involves excessive cuddling, cheek squishing, playing with your hair and invading your personal space with absolutely zero shame whatsoever.

and unfortunately for you, your reactions only amuse her even more afterward.

➤ SINCLAIR ❝ o-oh. that means you’re. . happy right now, right ? ❞

poor sinclair nearly short-circuits the first time he hears you purr.

he freezes completely for several seconds, a soft blush spreading like petals across his face - all the more once he understands it’s born from your comfort in his presence.

soon enough, he grows noticeably softer whenever it happens - partly because the endearing sound reminds him of normalcy, partly because it’s simply soothing to hear - though most of the time he’s far too flustered to mention it directly, of course.

➤ OUTIS ❝ you seem. . rather prone to making that sound around me lately. ❞

maybe a little mildly surprised at first, but that’s about the extent of it. you being able to purr isn’t exactly the end of the world or anything, is it ?

but you may catch those same subtle little reactions whenever you purr near her - or because of her purposefully - if your eyes happen to be sharp enough for it, though discerning whatever thoughts lie behind them remains practically impossible as always.

➤ GREGOR ❝ hah. . . guess that means you’re comfortable around me, huh? ❞

somewhat caught off guard the first few times he hears you purr just like the rest of the sinners, and he adjusts to it in a short time too.

before long, he starts finding the sound oddly soothing - enough for your presence itself to gradually become something nice to have around from time to time.