i no longer force things. what flows, flows. what crashes, crashes. i only have space and energy for things that are meant for me.

…Her wings are cut and then she is blamed for not knowing how to fly.

Moving on is a lot like moving out. They both involve leaving your home.

I think I’ve always been half out of my shell and half in. Sometimes I can be extremely wild and sometimes I can be extremely shy. It just depends on the day.

how do i become who i dream to be how do i move on from here how do i wake up with no fear how do i get to a new tomorrow

i. january it’s easy to fall back into old habits, but it’s far more rewarding to learn from them. ii. february you are capable of far more than you believe. spend your days breaking barriers you didn’t even know existed. iii. march mortality is fragile; he knew it, and you know it. there’s nothing you could have done to save someone who didn’t want to be saved. iv. april sometimes, you have to take responsibility for things you didn’t do in order to maintain necessary peace. v. may goodbyes are never easy; as your heart is ripped apart, remember they’re headed off to change the world. the opportunities are endless. be excited for them. vi. june don’t be afraid to trust; although others have torn you to shreds, the way he looks at you with soft eyes should make you believe he is different. he’s after your heart; give it to him. vii. july even an ocean between you two can’t stop the love you feel for him. no amount of vodka can drown it; learn to accept your feelings. viii. august it’s okay to put faith in your own judgements. your gut feeling is normally right, so listen to what it tells you. ix. september when you are patient, good things will come. don’t lose hope just because there’s a wait. x. october it’s important to know when to stop waiting and take matters into your own hands. if you want to know the taste of his lips, stop complaining and find out for yourself. xi. november kiss him whenever you can and tell him you love him with your words and without. take advantage of the time you have together because, soon, thousands of miles will separate you. xii. december stop holding back who you are, and allow yourself to be vulnerable for once. it will pay off, dear.

And I think I’ve lost him If I ever had him I was hesitant, uncertain With images of his heart Ignored and smashed the floor                                                     But you, they, were not nervous Why worry about a rotting corpse Miles away when there was A new, beating and lively one Easy and ready and close                                               It was my decision, wasn’t it? Was it? I can’t remember I couldn’t remember him For a while when your heart Was so close to my ears                                             But now you’re gone and I swear Sometimes I can hear a thud From miles away, laying cold So I stay here shivering too Wondering if someday, far away                                                A resurrection can occur Or if They have already dug our grave

at night when I go to bed i tell myself tomorrow will be better tomorrow I will feel better then the morning comes and nothing has changed everything feels the same

When you go to sleep at the end of the day, you won’t remember all the hurried people who didn’t even look at you. Nor the ones who brought you trouble, as you try hard to forget them. But you will remember someone who gave you an encouraging look, a smile, or a kind word. Remember that.

If a writer falls in love with you, you can never die.

He said he loves me, it was the first time he said it aloud. I was in my bed, his voice was resonant, and he sounded serious. Time stalled it seemed for a mere second, and I felt trapped in the twilight zone. My heart felt heavy, and I tried processing my emotions at that moment, as my heartstrings became slowly undone. He said he loves me. The words were spoken as if whispered like a secret meant kept between us, but audible enough for me to hear. My mind raced, and as time went along slowly, I believed him. My heart thumped––beating with joy, my mind refreshed––nourished by his declaration of love, and those familiar butterflies fluttered inside, while my stomach did somersaults. I chuckled and said I love you too, and tried to rush him off the phone so I could go meet him. I walked to the place we agreed on, and every step felt like I was ascending into a pit of bliss. He said he loves me. Those words and the tone behind them echoed in my head as I sat and waited for him. I felt everything––nervousness, euphoria, and bewilderment. Nervous because I’ve never felt weak knees, sweaty palms, and a rush of adrenaline from hearing three simple words, but three simple words encased with meaningful and genuine intent. I felt euphoric because our feelings were mutual, even if it wasn’t the same magnitude, at least for the time being. I felt bewilderment––it wasn’t expected, but in true fashion, the sweet nothings from him never were. He said he loves me and when I saw his dimples deepen and his eyes glisten once the car pulled up, I knew it was true.

I think I lost my mind Somewhere along these lines Of words, thoughts, and feelings. I’m feeding into my addictions Chasing the dragon Without restrictions. Tonight is the night I drink to the last drop I don’t want to stop. Smoke a little green Just to kill the edge I’m hanging by my fingertips On this blurry ledge. This time, I’m going to do it right And if I do I might not remember the night.

What do you miss the most about him?” “I’m not sure,” she whispered, looking down to the ground, “I’m not even sure if I do miss him. I miss the memories, and I miss talking to him and the way he made me feel. But I still don’t know if miss him, you know?“

Sometimes there is beauty in brokenness.

So in the process of moving on, we learn to hate the person we once loved. Because it’s easier to hate them, than it is to deal with the fact that you still love them. It’s easier to keep this cold attitude against them, than it is to realize they’re never coming back, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about that.