Limps Admirably

“I’m a therapist and keep this poster in my waiting room, apparently it’s saved a few lives.”

I don’t like the phrase “a cry for help.” I just don’t like how it sounds. When somebody says to me, “I’m thinking about suicide. I have a plan: I just need a reason not to do it,” the last thing I see is helplessness.

I think your depression has been beating you up for years. It’s called you ugly, and stupid, and pathetic, and a failure, for so long that you’ve forgotten that it’s wrong. You don’t see any good in yourself, and you don’t have any hope.

But still here you are: you’ve come over to me, banged on my door and said, “HEY! Staying alive is REALLY HARD right now! Just give me something to fight with! I don’t care if it’s a stick! Give me a stick and I can stay alive!”

How is that helpless? I think that’s incredible. You’re like a marine: trapped for years behind enemy lines. Your gun has been taken away, you’re out of ammo, you’re malnourished, and you’ve probably caught some kind of jungle virus that’s making you hallucinate giant spiders.

And you’re still just going, “GIVE ME A STICK. I’M NOT DYING OUT HERE.” “A cry for help” makes it sound like I’m supposed to take pity on you, but you don’t need my pity. This isn’t pathetic. This is the will to survive. This is how humans lived long enough to become the dominant species.

With NO hope, running on NOTHING, you’re ready to cut through a hundred miles of hostile jungle with nothing but a stick, if that’s what it takes to get to safety.

All I’m doing is handing out sticks.

“Why are you so lazy?”

But you’re not lazy. Lazy is when you shrug things off because you can’t summon up the give-a-damn. When you’re curled up tight on your chair, at your desk, alone and grey and desperately wishing that you had your life in order, that you did all those things that you had to do, that it didn’t feel like breaking rocks just to feed and clothe yourself and get some sleep, that’s not lazy.

People don’t understand. You tell them “It’s Hard.” They tell you, “No it isn’t. You’re just lazy.”

You start to wonder if they’re right. Is breaking those rocks easy for everyone else? Are they that much stronger than you? They don’t look like they’re struggling. “Just try harder,” they say. But you’re trying. It’s not working. Breaking boulders in your path until you’re spent isn’t lazy, and you do it day after day.

You’re not lazy. Most people don’t have those rocks to break.They don’t even know what it’s like to have to break rocks to get things done. They don’t understand how hard you have to work, and how hopeless you feel, when you try and fail to do what they do easily. Things hard harder for you, they really are. And if those people had to deal with your problems they wouldn’t be doing any better.

You’re not lazy. You’re not weak. You’re fighting hard. I guess I just want you to know that I know that.”

symptoms:

small

makes small noises

small brain (stupid)

diagnosis: baby

Right now, a growing number of businesses are pledging to guarantee birth control coverage for their workers. Why? Because it’s essential health care that helps workers thrive, and because access to birth control fosters more equitable, inclusive working environments. 

Business for Birth Control’s call to action is so important right now, because sexual and reproductive health care is under threat in the U.S. and around the world. Any day now, the Supreme Court will make a decision on two dangerous Trump administration rules that would allow employers and universities — based on their personal objections — to deny birth control coverage to employees and students. And the Trump administration has tried to bully the United Nations to eliminate references to sexual and reproductive health as part of their global COVID-19 plans, ignoring the essential nature of reproductive health care during a pandemic and always. 

Businesses that pledge to be a #BusinessforBC are helping to educate and inspire others in the business community to show their support for accessible birth control for all people. These companies know that access to birth control improves economic and health outcomes. Nearly 90% of women of reproductive age have used contraception in their lifetimes, and access to birth control has been proven to increase education level and wage earning. 

Pledging to guarantee birth control access is part of a larger commitment to racial and gender equity, too: Women of color, especially Black and Indigenous women, face disproportionate barriers to accessing affordable health care. Access to a full range of sexual and reproductive health services is key to addressing historical disparities in unintended pregnancy, maternal mortality rates, and higher rates of breast and cervical cancer. 

Women of color also face greater institutional barriers to promotion in the workplace. Black women and Latinas in the U.S. today earn just over half of what their white male counterparts earn. We have a long way to go, but committing to birth control coverage is one step toward greater racial equity in the workforce and more inclusive economic growth. 

Businesses that have pledged to be a #BusinessforBC include:

Amalgamated Bank

Argent

Bad Robot Productions

CREDO Mobile

Female Quotient

Hims & Hers

Jaya Apparel Group, parent company to Cinq à Sept and Likely

Postmates 

The Helm

The Lede Company

Trillium Asset Management

Tumblr

Laziest game of fetch ever

an addition…

Over at Instagram Khary Payton writes:

This my kid. One of the most happy, well-adjusted individuals I’ve ever known. My son, Karter. Karter with a K because it reminded him of my name. He chose it. You see, he was born female but has always identified as a boy. He thought it would be cool if I announced it on social media. I told him that there would be so many supporters but also a lot of jerks who would be harsh. He said, “Yeah, I know about trolls, daddy. I can handle trolls.” 😅 Man, there is nothing more beautiful than watching your child feel the joy of exploring what it means to be true to themselves. This is his journey, and I am here for it. I hope you all have the opportunity to feel the unquenchable love that I am feeling right now.

GM: “Have you taken any damage?”