ACEQUIRE

Asexuality is rare and oft misunderstood, but mostly it is not broadly recognized. There are not many of us calling out across the oceans of people, as some may not even be aware of the term, and others still are hesitant to breach the surface and openly declare their asexuality. And for an asexual person desiring a real-life relationship (romantic, platonic or otherwise) with another asexual person, the search can seem interminable.

There may be times when you feel like you’re the only asexual person in the world. All you can do, really, is belt out your melody and hope for an answer.

That’s what I did for three years, swimming through various social networks and dating websites, perusing AVEN’s meetup section looking for others in my area. I wasn’t getting any hits, and I almost lost hope.

And then the unimaginable happened. A few weeks ago, a message popped up in my OKCupid inbox. The sender was a jaw-dropping 98% match, practically an anomaly considering how many questions he had answered. It wasn’t difficult to find out why: This person was also asexual. I was stunned. I knew had to meet him.

After our first successful encounter, I am pleased to say this will be my first Valentine’s Day that I will be spending with someone. I’ll be bringing the box of chocolates I had bought last month when I assumed I was going to be eating them alone.  If I hadn’t called out, even with the barest possibility of an answer, I probably would be.