Acacia's Journey

DIY Gemstone Necklace

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{HELL YEAH CHRISTMAS}

Odin: y’all down there makin gingerbread houses while i’m makin a gingerbreaD KINGDOM *air horns blare in the background*

Frigg: The spirit of the holidays? Arguing over the last toy in Walmart because fUCKING SUSAN WON’T SHUT HER STUPID FUCKING FA—

Thor: *chugging literally all the egg nog ever*

Loki: *calling Santa* WHAT DO YOU FUCKING MEAN I’M NOT AT THE TOP OF THE NAUGHTY LIST? WHAT AM I️ GONNA HAVE TO DO, MURDER SOMEONE? *balder walks by* …………..i have to call you back

Skadi: HON, I COULD GIVE LESS THAN TWO SHITS ABOUT YULE. WHAT I’M HERE FOR IS WINTER!! *chugs bottle of vodka while shooting arrows everywhere*

Njörd: ,,can i go back to the beach now

Heimdallr: Gather round children, I’m here to tell you the tale of how The Loki Stole Yule Brisingamen

Forseti: what do i want for a present? *clenches fist as he slowly takes off sunglasses* justice

Balder: wow, look at the beautiful mistletoe! hopefully nothing ironic will happen to me involving my love for this SPECIFIC plant! *looks into camera*

Freyja: can we please recognize mrs. claus? cause santa’s a hoe please and thank

Freyr: ALRIGHT BITCHES, BREAK OUT THEM UGLY SWEATERS,

I was visiting a friend of the family one time and I was just casually watching tv when I thought I heard the water running. I go into the kitchen but everything’s fine. the parrot looks at me and says “gotcha”.

He likes to scream and mimic the sounds of things falling off the shelf and when we run into the room to see what’s happening he says “The cat did it! Bad Sammy!” and laughs.

Whenever he gets mad at me he flies away from me, but since he can’t fly very well, he always crash lands. And the first thing he says when I go to pick him up, without fail, is always “You need to vacuum,” in a very bitter grumble. 

Loki likes to call our cat to him. He’ll sit there for minutes saying “here kitty kitty kitty.” The cat will come, walk up to the bird, get bit and then Loki will laugh as the cat screams and runs away. This goes on for hours. 

If it’s late at night and he’s tired, but I’m still up with the lights on, he’ll say “Loki go night night.” It’s starts of in a normal tone and then gets louder and louder until he’s screaming “LOKI GO NIGHT NIGHT!” 

If he sees my dad fall asleep, he screams like a little girl to scare my dad awake. And then laughs. He’s kind of perfected that evil laugh.

“Yes good”

“AND EAT THE BAD ONES”

“Wait no”

“EAT THEM”