December 31, 2020 | Recollection of events.
Salutation to my blog, the time has approved to review the moments I encountered and to reflect on my experience through this year. I want to evaluate my growth in 2020 and what do pursue in hopes for more evolution in 2021.Â
What I have learned from venturing life in 2020?
Have I grown more as a woman this year?
Did I improve on the obstacles that is hindering my growth as a woman?
Did I achieve any of my goals this year?
I begin by saying I am not in a good state currently. Nightmares increased for me and became more aggressive. I lost my hard drive and am currently not certain if the files can be saved since the hard drive is now raw.
Many of my goals were not completed with many onerous and unsettling challenges, with trying to learn to animate, exercise, expose the people who attacked my home, repair my residence and help pay off my relativeâs debts were all sabotaged.
I was cruelly mistreated on my blogs, Crunchyroll, Facebook and YouTube. I am not surprised since my spirit has experienced cruelty and disrespect since my child years. No worries, as the learning lesson for me since I was a girl is to not ever have faith in mankind. That no individual excluding some of my relatives cares if I live or die in this world. The world reveres evil and criminals more than the just and people who are altruistic and fight for truth.
Despite the mental health fluctuation, I continue to excel my education and have learned new vocabulary words like prodigious or affluent. I am ebullient to see my progress in math is improving, though fractions and Calculus continues to be an obstacle I slowly stagger with, for now.
I have pursued the interest to learn stocks again, thanks to visiting a stream from Ohmwrecker/Maskedgamer. In 2021, I seek to learn more on Bitcoin and stocks to hopefully earn some money while retaining a new skill to share to other people.
I have cogitated on the thoughts of wanting to leave this world, not through death but voluntary exit. Every form of life was unfortunately created by an evil spirit that wants mankind and animals to inhabit a planet filled with diabolical degenerates destroying the future. The pain of knowing that neither of us as people are prohibited rom voluntarily leaving this wicked world brings a wound to my soul that will not ever heal.
What I learned in 2020 was Guatemalaâs syphilis experiment occurred in the same timespan as the Tuskegee Syphilis Experiment, where nefarious people injected the disease in individuals to study the side effects. The same also occurred in Japan during the 1940s - 1950s.
I learned of the HPV vaccine that either killed young women in India or made the recipients of the drug sterile, resulting in the Gardasil lawsuit. I have gained awareness of how manipulative and unethical Merck and Pfizer are to test their drugs on the poor. My faith in pharmaceutical companies and these synthetic chemicals are doing more harm to civilians and the environment, which should encourage questions from people why do these companies and doctors refuse to use natural remedies, ingredients from the Earth? Â
The cruelty and hypocrisy of society deflecting from a topic by bringing up another, irrelevant comment has reared that ugly head again, mainly toward the George Floyd or Breonna Taylor âcontroversy.â Their criminal past received more attention from bigots than the killers, which has no reaction from me since I am aware how people are. Seeing evil individuals defend the film Cuties that should have incited more outrage raises the question what is going to happen to the children in the future, if there are people who want to see more âmoviesâ like that.
We are not aware of what the future will bring, but realistically I expect no good and hope for the world to improve. With the vaccine debate, the concern what will Biden do as president, the economy impacted by the pandemic and society as usual ignoring the citizens who are overlooked in this world (the poor, the homeless, the orphans, the stray animals).Â
I want my relatives to be relieved of the financial debt they are experiencing, and desire each individual to be financially secure.Â
I want me and my relatives who have endured trauma from sexual abuse to be healed, for our spirits to be cleansed of the defilement, the generational curses and any ungodly covenants.Â
I want to depart this world, to leave alive and not ever visit this decadent planet again. The amount of hedonism, violence, corruption, death, illnesses and suffering on this Earth is immeasurable, and is too much for my spirit to take any further.Â
I want the nightmares to cease, as I do not remember the last time I have felt at peace and sound after a slumber. I want to obtain my sound mind again, my buoyancy, my innocence back, and what was defile to be cut off since I lacked the courage to finish the procedure when the pain became to immense. I desire the most is freedom. I am aware that will not be a reality since the creator would rather watch you suffer or die in this world than to ever grant you independence to walk your path.
If any user actually read this far, you have condolence and may your days be filled with joy and peace, more than mine has ever had