Pie corrupts. Absolute pie corrupts absolutely. Also, my name's Aleksa. I sometimes post adult stuff cuz I’m an adult so I think minors should not follow.
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Most ficlets are crossed posted to AO3 - GGFJ84 Works
Posted - 7.11.2026
Radom Ficlets
Mic'ed Up Shane - Ilya is a menace, but Shane can give it right back. Then feels.
Olympian Redux - The NHL didn’t allow its players to compete in the PyeongChang 2018 Winter Olympics. Let’s pretend it did. The boys enjoy the Games together.
Away Games - Shane needs to get laid.
Clothes Thief - Ilya is missing his Tom Ford jacket; Shane wears it to a game.
Home Opener - David attends Ilya's first game in Ottawa. It's gonna become a thing.
Sochi Revisited - A retelling of the Sochi scene from Ilya's POV; then Shane and Ilya represent the same team in Milan.
Themed Week Ficets
Hollanov Week 2026 - Of Tuna Melts and Injured Ribs - A quick little ficlet about Shane's birthday the year he was injured in "I'll Believe in Anything."
Shane Week 2026
Two Minutes for Roughing - Shane and Ilya fight (and flirt) for the puck. (Prompt - Fluff)
Hollanov and Rozanov - Ilya leaves the NHL. Shane reacts accordingly. (Prompt - Angst)
Shane Summerfest 2026
Week 1 - Too Pretty to Hate - During the World Junior Championships, Ilya realizes the universe wants he and Shane to hate each other. Shane decides that’s not going to happen.
Week 2 - The Haunting of Shane Hollander by a Very Much Alive Ilya Rozanov - After missing for almost four months, Ilya visits Shane in summer attire. It’s October. In Montreal. (on AO3)
Week 3 - All Fun and Gains - Ilya and Shane share another commercial shoot, and Ilya's life changes on a California beach similar to the way it changed in a Toronto ice rink.
Missing Scenes and Shorts
From Compromised -
Interlude - Ruby is kidnapped by a Boston mob boss. Shane calls Ilya for help.
Original Ending - Scott visits the new Hollanov Residence and interrupt Shane and Ilya's anniversary.
From Shane Hollander, Resident HAB of the Ottawa Centaurs -
Missing Scene 1 - The WAGs lay down some ground rules for Shane.
Missing Scene 2 - NHL Awards 2021 - What happens at the awards, happens again at the awards, just reverse.
My brother’s friend went exploring in a mine shaft and found a ringtail and thought it was a “sketchy ass cat” and decided to pet it and it bit him and he had to go to the hospital for rabies shots DONT DO DRUGS KIDS
if this becomes a heritage post my life would be complete although i feel i should provide some more context as this post begins to blow up:
-the video is from a time before sharing files across devices was trivial, which is why it looks so bizarre. my brother took the original video which i believe was a snapchat video which somehow got uploaded onto my parents’ computer, where my brother showed it to me. i immediately recognized the comedic gold and insisted on getting my own copy, so i re-filmed it on my own digital camera, which is why my brother is narrating what the video will be about before it starts. i then managed to get it onto my tumblr through a series of dark magic rituals. this is why it has an old mac toolbar AND a weird caption AND a vidlab watermark. simpler times indeed
-i was not involved in the act of exploring an abandoned mine shaft (extremely dangerous, do not do this) or touching the wild animal (extremely dangerous, do not do this) or hanging out with my brother (extremely dangerous, do not do this) and i do not endorse any of the behavior depicted here. leaving me notes and comments explaining that this was a bad idea is not a productive use of your time. i have known that everything my brother and his friends do is stupid and dangerous my entire life but at least in this instance we get to enjoy the fruits of their poor choices
-preston was fine. he was scratched up and got some rabies shots but this was not the first, last, or worst injury incurred by a young man who decided to follow my brother’s recommendations for what would be a good and cool idea to do. (his best friend was taken from our house to the ER six times over the course of middle and high school.) to my knowledge the ringtail was also fine despite his encounter with the cast of temu jackass.
-THIS IS PRESTON, GETTING EATEN, BY A….SKETCHY ASS CAT. MILESUNDERGROUND
ilya after the outing just liking all the videos of shane, the edits, the highlights, the compilations. every video of shane the TheRealIlyaRozanov can finally leave his likes there. at first the fans loses their minds “omg ilya liking all shane’s videos” but after a while is just so common that every caption in the post just have a shout out to ilya cus he’s probably seeing and liking it
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shane is stepping into the shower and not even a full minute later ilya is right behind him and shane’s like “you know we can shower separately?” and ilya just goes “ah no we can’t we’re married” and shane laughs and says “ilya not all married couples shower together” and ilya’s like “they should it’s the law” and shane’s like “what law?” and ilya goes “marital law” and shane says cackling “there’s no such thing” and ilya just says shrugging “there’s and you’re not allowed to shower by yourself you need me to wash your hair and your body” and shane’s like “this is just an excuse to touch me naked” and ilya grins and goes “no it’s the marital law” and shane just shakes his head laughing because his husband is absolutely ridiculous and he loves him so much
Hey do you know alot about internal organs. Cause if so then i have a pretty specific question.
Are... are your organs covered in blood??? Since blood tends to flow thru the blood vessels, and if your body is healthy and all your blood vessels are imtact then your organs shouldn't be covered in blood, right? But just saying that feels wrong.
No, unless you are actively experiencing internal bleeding then your organs are not covered in blood. They are however wet, but it's cerebrospinal fluid and mucus that keeps them that way.
Trust me you do not want them to be in any other condition. If they were covered in blood then there would be no way for your body to effectively circulate that blood, leading you to bleed out. As for them being wet, I personally would not want to experience dry friction on my organs so I am more than okay with that
Also just to clear up any further confusion, cerebrospinal fluid (as the name implies) is contained to just your brain and spinal cord. The rest are protected by mucous
Not gonna lie this makes me a bit irritated. Here's the real version of this photo:
Instead of a cutesie reference to film censorship it was an explicit statement of defiance of Maryland's criminalization gay sex, which was not repealed until 2002. This wasn't a guy saying "Oh they can't put what I do in the movies according to a completely voluntary industry code" he was saying "The State of Maryland wants to put me in jail for being gay and having gay sex."
It wasn't a guy being cheeky about sex in an ambiguous, cute way. It was a man stating, in no uncertain terms, that a whole state of the United States considered him a criminal for being homosexual.
when the chemistry is so good you can turn the hudcon into hollanov because what do you mean this isn’t them posing for the press release of their marriage
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“Shane fuck Shane help we fucked up, we lost Ilya, I swear he was here one second ago and now-“
“Haas, where are you right now?”
“The club by the hotel.”
“And he’s not in the bathroom?”
“No.”
“Not on the roof?”
“No.”
“Not trying to access any of the dancers poles?”
“What? Why would- Oh, Troy says no.”
“Is he hanging out with drunk girls in the women’s bathroom?”
“Umm, one sec. Harris, can you ask her if Ilya is in there? … Harris says no.”
“Ok. What were you talking about before he disappeared?”
“We were trying to figure out where to eat.”
“Did anyone bring up sushi?”
“He didn’t say he wanted-“
“Just answer the question.”
“Uh yeah, someone suggested it, but he said he wanted-“
“He’s at the pier.”
“What?”
“He got bored, sushi put fish on his brain, which made him think about water, and he likes going to piers, and the hotel is walking distance from a boardwalk by the water. He’s there, most likely trying to look at fish going under the dock.”
“… How do you know that?”
“Do you have any ideas how many times I have gotten this exact phone call? He’s easier to catch if you bait him with mozzarella sticks but make sure he knows he only gets them if he comes quietly. If you let him negotiate he will take the sticks and run. Cliff always fell for that.”
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Ilya getting punished for something. The punishment?
Shane locks the door to their gym and works out alone, without an audience, and makes sure Ilya knows he’s wearing a tiny white tshirt and even tinier white short shorts and his backwards Rozanov 81 Cens ball cap.
Halfway through just to be a shit Shane FaceTimes Rose.
Ilya is suffering greatly.
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