A Lady of Three Outs @absolutepie - Tumblr Blog

has Ilya never experienced jealousy before he met Shane? I swear the man looks like he’s going to war when Shane dates Rose. is he going to be okay? should someone check on Ilya? I don’t think he’s ever been at a point where he’s felt actual jealousy. he’s so used to getting what he wants and he’s never been in love the way he’s in love with Shane. I’m convinced he’s never been jealous because what do you mean he looks like got severely murdered???

absolutepie

Yo, he looks so murderous I worry any time someone tags their HCs with #myshane. Like shut up, he’s Gonna Get Us. Thats hashtag HisShane.

Same with #myilya quite frankly, let’s keep it quiet cuz Shane is Not Chill either.

#ilya rozanov #shane hollander #hollanov #heated rivalry

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indecisivewrangler

HR Fics Pt 3 (Married Hollanov being Married )

Heteronormative? More like Homonormative by M-1dn1ght-s A series of vignettes where Shane reminds everyone that he is ALSO the man in the relationship. Hollanov Havoc by fffpppp Shane Hollander is married, out, and unhinged. Ilya Rozanov is Shane Hollander's biggest supporter. white girl wasted by fbiyaoi Shane Hollander celebrates his hattrick against the Montréal Metros 36 Questions That Lead to Love by UglyGreenJacket Married Hollanov divulge too much about their love life

yolkylemon

💪 💦

ilya version

chemdoodles

lexicanons

With the World Cup happening, I’m thinking about how if Shane and Ilya played football for the same club they would be able to hide in plain sight because football players are so affectionate with each other. No one would bat an eye at Ilya kissing Shane on the cheek and smacking him on the ass after scoring a goal. They would be like this after every goal scored:

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lexicanons

Ilya and Yuna get together to hang out sometimes. It’s just them, some wine, and shit talking. One night at the Hollander house, Ilya drinks a little too much and his lips get loose.

“Mama, you remember when we met on elevator?”

“Yeah honey.”

“Well I was going up to Shane’s room that night.”

Yuna doesn’t say anything. She just wonders how she never noticed.

lexicanons

Supermodel Ilya is married to Billionaire Shane who’s always busy running his companies. Shane often leaves early in the morning before Ilya wakes and returns late when Ilya is asleep. The few dates they do go on are interrupted by phone calls and Shane needing to respond to emails. Ilya is over it but instead of talking to Shane about it (because Hollanov do not communicate properly even in an AU) he decides he’s not waiting at home like a good little trophy.

He gets Svetlana and the two start lighting up the town like the old days. They’re photographed going in and out of clubs with random men and women around them. Rumors start flying that Ilya and Shane are headed for divorce. Eventually, this all gets back to Shane. His assistant apologizes for bothering him but he needs to see this. Shane is shown a video of Ilya coming out of the club with Svetlana and this up and coming actor Luca Haas. Luca stumbles and Ilya effortlessly carries him to the awaiting car. All of the comments are saying Ilya and Luca are fucking and Shane is pretty sure he’ll have a stroke if he doesn’t calm down in the next 2 second.

He has his assistant reschedule his meetings and rushes home. He finds Ilya getting ready for another night out and Shane stops him from going. The two argue and Ilya says something like “I think you only married me to be trophy” and Shane realizes the error of his ways. He hires some trusted people and delegates a lot of tasks so he can get home at a decent time and so he can actually be off on the weekends. Ilya sends Svetlana and Luca a text saying the plan worked and that he gave Luca’s info to his director friend. Luca says he’s happy to be of service. Svetlana says he still needs to work on his communication.

sapphling

and honestly it's just fucking insane that every time we try to talk about harm to children in particular we have to talk circles around the fact that these things are very, very overwhelmingly done by parents/family members/teachers/religious leaders/known and trusted adults in a position of power over a child, to the extent that many people's suggested solution to child abuse is "give the people most likely to abuse a child EVEN MORE strangling legal and material power over the kid"

sapphling

you're not supposed to actually address who is abusing children and what can be done to give those children recourse and the ability to leave abusive situations because nobody actually gives a shit about child abuse beyond the familial property rights violation it represents to them and the cudgel against minorities which it can be turned into

shower-thoughts-last-responder

You see something broadly similar in nursing where you have to tip toe round the fact that nurses can directly and intentionally harm patients; one of the most common phrases you'll hear when trying to address an issue is something like "well no nurse is coming to work deliberately wanting to hurt their patients". I don't say this to derail from the issue of protecting children from their parents/guardians, i say it because i think it highlights the consistent problems that not offending the sensibilities of people in positions of power over vulnerable people is seen as more important then actually protecting those vulnerable people. "How dare you suggest I'm a bad parent, I'm not going to listen to anything you say because clearly you just hate me, and my feelings are clearly the real issue now" type mindset that means you end you talking circles around issues trying not offend anyone instead of directly addressing what is wrong

shanebug

lowkey my david and yuna hollander parenting thesis

yolkylemon

💪 💦

ilya version

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yolkylemon

myilya for those who believe

shane version

madebymothman

Okay was not expecting everybody to go so crazy for Shanebug (affectionate) so... More doodles lol

+ bonus Live Ilya Reaction

madebymothman

Another sweatsuit Ilya because thinking about this while high last night made me laugh

madebymothman

Juicy sweatsuit Ilya ft. Anya being the world's biggest purse dog

firstprinced

shane: >:| ilya: i'm literally hard rn (canon)

⇒ request by my luv @yearnalisms 💙

absolutepie

That angry kitten’s got hands

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Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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localairport

Ok perverts listen up these kind of creepshots are basically upskirts of airplanes ok. Dont do it.

localairport

You disgusting pervert.

grickle14

Universal parenting.

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