“sugar plum” - @hollanovmicrofic - wc: 504
“oh!”
shane feels ilya jump beside him and quickly tightens his grip around his husband’s arm. his eyes shoot down to the floor looking around for the danger. what he finds is an enthusiastic golden retriever of one or two years old snuffling the back of ilya’s knee. deciding the threat isn’t actually threatening in the slightest, shane lets go and steps away so he can observe ilya’s reaction from a distance.
“why hello!” ilya earnestly giggles in delight and shane falls even more in love with him than should be possible. ilya scans left and right quickly for any indication of who’s dog this is. he lands on a printed picture of the retriever laminated and stuck to a nearby shelf. the sign below it reads ‘say hi to our shop dog! she’s friendly!’
“ah, you are a working girl, i should have know,” ilya grins, squatting down to her level, “and what is your name?”
he fights against her constant excited wiggling to twist around her magenta collar, a distinct metal jingling filling the air. ilya gets a hold of her tags and his whole face scrunches up in deep offense.
“sugar plum!” ilya exclaims, disgust evident in his voice. shane has to shove a fist in his mouth to stifle his laughter, “oh no, милая девочка* that is… unfortunate.” he starts to scratch behind her ears and her drooling tongue enthusiastically tries to lick his left wrist, “sugar plum is not the name of a sophisticated lady like you.”
sugar plum, completely oblivious, flops over happily on the linoleum floor so ilya can scratch her belly.
“hmmm, there’s yelena. good name. have you seen the black widow movie? yelena is blonde and very fierce like you,” he’s rubbing rapidly over her fuzzy ribcage and she’s pawing at him for more, “how about zlata? you know what zlata means?”
his hands stop and sugar plum-yelena-zlata blinks at him once, twice before barking impatiently.
“gold, yes! what a smart dog you are! shane, did you see-“ he looks up for the first time, eyes immediately clocking the phone in shane’s hands, “you have been recording this whole time?”
shane nods and his phone nods with him. an evil smile threatens to cross his face as he waits for ilya to realize his plan. ilya turns back to sugar plum when she jumps up to her feet again, shakes herself off and pads away. shane can see the exact moment it dawns on ilya.
“asshole!” he shoots up and points an accusatory finger at shane’s face, “you will show none of this to anya when we get home.”
his smile finally breaks and shane is practically buzzing with pent up laughter, “she’s going to be soooo sad. so betrayed by her papa, i guess she’ll have to cuddle me tonight. sighhhh.”
“this is parental alienation, shane!” ilya grabs for shane’s phone but he’s just barely able to leap out of the way, “i will sue!”
—
*sweet girl
