Welcome to my own little world. :)

Avengers: Infinity War (2018) dir. Joe & Anthony Russo

At least if you don’t know any of the Seven Birds or the boy in question.

But people still go to Angus with the questions. He practically has a script.

“Is Magnus as strong as the Story says?” Stronger.

“Does Lucretia really write with both hands?” Yes, and at the same time.

“What’s Lup like?” Fiery, fierce, wonderful.

“How many pairs of jeans does Barry have?” More than one.

“Is Merle seeing anyone?” Angus does not know and will not ask.

“Where did Davenport get the money for the Wavehumper?” Battlewagon racing.

“So Taako teaches you? Is he, like, your dad now?”

This is, to Angus, the most awkward question, so he feels no guilt over replying with an appropriately snarky answer each time.

“Well, no, sir, but I’m officially a part of the Taako brand. You too can get your own Taako-brand Agnes McDonald for only 420 payments of one gold.”

“No, ma’am, he’s my eccentric uncle. He’s going to die under mysterious circumstances forcing me to solve the mystery of his death so I can inherit a large fortune.”

“He’s my employer, sir. I’m a professor at the school. I have tenure.”

“I’m actually a dragon, and I’m older than he is, Mx.”

“Ma’am, he pushed me off a train, and you think he could be trusted with a child?”

And so on.

Because the Birds are adequately awe-inspiring and overwhelming (because most people have never seen Magnus cry over a dog or Barry eating too much cheese for science again), they don’t know about the questions for the most part, and Angus certainly isn’t going to fill them in. They’ve got enough to do, and Angus can handle it.

For the most part.

While out and about with Taako one day, shopping with a miles long list of spell components and groceries, someone practically bowls Angus over. While he’s reeling, the sentient wrecking ball notices who Angus is with.

“Oh my gods, TAAKO!” A human woman shrieks, completely missing the boy she nearly demolished.

“Uh… hail and well met.” Taako gives a casual wave, and Angus can see Taako glance down at him. “So. You good there, Agnes?”

“Agnes?” The woman asks, nonplussed before finally registering that the object she’d collided with was a living being. “Oh! This must be your son! From the story? Bet you’re happy that an amazing wizard like Taako adopted you, aren’t you?” The woman coos at the end in an annoying high-pitched voice, pinching Angus’s cheek and knocking his glasses askew again just as he’d managed to right them. Angus gets his glasses on again just in time to see a weird look on Taako’s face. Great. Now he’ll have to deal with Taako teasing about that. Angus opens his mouth to correct her, tell her no, he’s not-

“Adopted? What? Why would you think my son is adopted? Can’t you see the family resemblance? The Taako brand stunning good looks?” Taako slings an arm over Angus’s shoulder, grinning winningly at her.

“Sir-“

“Oh! I’m… I’m sorry?” The woman looks between Taako and Angus and back again, seemingly trying to do the math.

“Of course, cause, uh, he does take after his other dad. Right now, listen, this has been lovely, but, uh… parent duty calls? Come along, Agnes, time for… parental bonding and shit. Play catch? Teach you how to tie a tie? Drag you along fishing? That’s a thing dads do, right?” Taako steers Angus off with a wave back at the woman.

“Sir-“ Angus tries again as soon as they’re out of earshot.

“You good there, Ango? Battering ram back there coulda given Jess a run for her title.” Taako asks conversationally as he jabs a thumb back, pointing.

“Yes, but-“

“Cool.”

“Sir-“

“So let’s go.”

“Sir, you said-“

“I know what I said.” Taako cuts him off, suddenly more serious.

And Angus is overcome with something he doesn’t feel terribly often: confusion. “Why?”

And that seems to throw Taako off for some reason. “Um, well…” Taako hums, thinking. Or delaying. “Listen. She kinda, kinda caught me by surprise with that whole thing, but… why not? You know, uh, listen, you basically live with me and Krav. As far as I can tell you either have shit parents or no parents, which I can tell you: both suck in different ways. I teach you magic and shit.” Taako glances back to him before looking away again, ears twitching. “Unless, uh, unless you don’t want-“

Angus stares at Taako, who determinedly avoids eye contact as he continues rambling. “Sir.” Angus interrupts, and Taako stops mid-word. He seems like a barely contained whirlwind, all frantic energy ready to blow everywhere at once. “What else do we need to find before we go home?”

There’s a pause long enough for three loud heartbeats in Angus’s ears. Taako slowly smiles, tension easing and tornado dissipating. “I thought boy detectives had to be good at remembering shit? Okay, we got-“

Angus and Taako continue on with shopping, gradually making their way home.

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THIS IS IT CHIEF