What?

i wanna take your clothes off… ;) and then replace them with something else because that outfit is ugly as hell

Hello my baby hello my honey hello darkness my old friend

How dare you make me hear this with my own internal monologue.

Captain Underpants comes out on Pride Month. Coincidence? I think the fuck NOT.

Excuse but Harold and George aint gay.

You miss the book where Harold has a husband?

Fanfiction aint canon

It’s in the official books written by the actual author, so it is canon. Pilkey wrote it, so it’s canon. 

I refuse to believe he willingly inserted a political agenda into a popular, established children series

i would kill to live in a small home with no financial worries

grow my own vegetables. some medicinal herbs. what more do you need

A cat

a cat.

#and you have to remember how many names are most likely missing#from rushed trains and burned lists#from rushed transports and people who died on the death marchs#what about the names from people who died after their liberation#and then…#this is only Auschwitz#this was the biggest camp yes#but just one of many#and then remember sobibor and belsec#and try not to feel sick

but why do you need both a fan and kirby?

To keep Kirby cool

that is fair and makes perfect sense

everybody: hugh, bring your big ass muscles over here and punch this guy on screen hugh jackman, quietly: i just want to sing

Feeling heavily attacked rn

If you were to vacuum up jello through a metal tube, well I think that’d be a neat noise 

i beg to differ 

Then Beg

My upstairs neighbor is having really loud sex at 10:25am. And, while this feels like retaliation, I can only hope it mellows her out and she stops stomping around all the goddamn time

Wow in the time it took me to type up and tag this post, the sex started and ended…… she’ll prolly be vacuuming soon. 🙁

It’s 10:29 and the sex has ended. I am v sad for her

I feel like I jinxed her. Like her nigga follows me on here and saw this post, mid thrust, and got performance anxiety. I’m sorry, Upstairs Stomping Bitch.

There’s stomping. She’s up and moving around. And you know what….. I can’t even be mad anymore. If I was only getting fucked for seven minutes at a time, I’d stomp around too.

Damn I just heard her door close and then footsteps coming down the stairs. He left 😭😭😭 he’s not even gonna try again.

I’m gonna need ear plugs for the level of stomping this is bound to cause. When her feet inevitably crash through my ceiling ima just look through the hole and be like “hi…. sorry you didn’t get fucked down this morning. Even tho you filed a noise complaint on me that one time, I was rooting for you.”

Update y’all: it’s 3:10pm and she is vacuuming THE FUCK out of the hardwood flooring

But then like, that really does sound like something ppl that are in need of orgasm do. Just extremely unnecessary cleaning, to take their mind off the lack of sexual release.

It’s 12:26am and she is getting her back blown tf outttt. Cannot be the same nigga from earlier.

I have the strong urge to knock the broom against the ceiling and holler out “yaaas bitch get some bomb ass dick” but I don’t wanna fuck up the vibe

Nvm. It lasted from 12:20-12:28. It’s the same nigga.

She better not start stomping or cleaning. I’ll file a noise complaint so fucking fast. Imagine getting a noise complaint for shitty sex. Don’t do it, Stomping Upstairs Bitch

what a ride

Not for her, apparently.

Feeling heavily attacked rn

Feeling heavily attacked rn