everything i've learned about personal growth, self-love, so far
this is called the principle of correspondence, it is one of the universal laws (the law of attraction is not the only one that exists!) it is very important because many times we try to change our outside without first changing our inside, how we feel about ourselves, or the circumstances that surround us.
just like how we feel, what we think we see reflected in the outside world.
everything is a reflection of ourselves, which is why it is very important not to react negatively to circumstances without first asking ourselves what is not working inside of us that is making this happen?
get out of the role of the victim
it is no use for us to live pitying ourselves for the past, for what happened, for how we behaved, or how they were with us.
Has victimization been working for you so far? no, it hasn't, so we have to get out of this role and take responsibility for our actions. we may have done wrong but at the time we did not know how to do it in a better way and all experiences, negative or positive, give us a learning experience.
that bad thing that may have happened to you with someone else can help you to push yourself and transform your life.
related to the previous point, we must stop living in the past, that will only make us repeat the same circumstances, and attract the same type of people over and over again. we have to forgive ourselves first and then others, no matter the damage they may have caused us, we can not continue to live hating or with resentment towards other people.
holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.
buddha
no one can help you to improve, only you
the change is in you and this is very important, i, a therapist, anyone can give you guidelines on how to heal or improve your life but if you do not do your part to change nothing will change.
there are no external means, everything is within you, and you have the power to change your life, yourself, and the circumstances that surround you.
just ask yourself why there are so many people who go to therapy for years and continue the same or worse? because they have put all their power into someone external to them and believe that someone else will solve all their problems.
what you focus on expands
this is so simple but we don't seem to give it much importance as we always tend to focus on what we don't like and keep wondering why nothing is changing.
if you focus on something you don't like you will keep attracting more of the same.
if there is a situation that you don't like, focus on the positive of it, whether it is something about you, a circumstance or a person.
what you focus on with your thought and feeling is what you attract into your experience.
rhonda byrne
it is useless to compare ourselves with other people, we must understand that each one of us is different and we are in this world to live and create our own experiences.
we also have to live our own lives and focus on ourselves.
i think it is stupid to think that someone is better or worse than us because this is our life, what matters is us, not someone we don't know at all or if we do know them, they don't really contribute to us.
anyway, we can learn from those people who inspire us to improve ourselves.
remember that there is no one prettier, smarter, smarter, whatever than you, it's just your perspective and you can change it and focus all that on yourself.
you want to change in your life but nothing is changing? maybe it is because you are trying to change something external without changing yourself first (i refer to the first point of this post, the correspondence principle)
i mean, if you keep having the same negative thoughts every day that will keep repeating itself in your daily experience.
start replacing those negative thoughts with more positive ones and everything will start to change around you.
if you want to manifest something and it is not manifesting ask yourself what your beliefs are about that subject and start affirming the opposite.
if you want more money but you keep thinking that you are not worthy or that it is very difficult to get it, you are blocking that abundance from coming into your life, so in turn tell yourself that you are abundant, that money flows in your life and it is very easy to get it.
and this is just an example, you can do it with anything.
i think this point is very important, so keep it really present in your life, whatever you create in your life you have created it before in your mind.
stop reacting to what others do or think
i think this is so powerful and keeps referring back to the previous points because everything has a relationship.
how much energy do we spend complaining about something that someone did that we didn't like or that seemed wrong to us? think that maybe that person didn't realize it or maybe they see it differently (that's why it's important to understand that everyone's perspective is different and doesn't mean it's right or wrong).
it doesn't matter what happened but we should stop responding to what we don't like and give so much importance to what other people do and focus all that energy on us, on what we want to improve.
this is one of the most powerful and simple teachings at the same time.
we have to stop criticizing ourselves (and of course others), stop judging ourselves for things we do or did and in turn, we have to start treating ourselves as the person we love the most in this world, with love and respect.
instead of judging ourselves, and scolding ourselves for what we have done wrong, we have to reward ourselves for every little thing we do daily, this will give us a lot of confidence in ourselves and will increase our self-esteem.
we will not always be positive
we are human, we feel, we suffer, and there are circumstances external to us that we can not control so it is totally normal to have bad days or not feel good (in the case of women is also due to our cycle) so we can not pretend to be always in a good mood, but that does not mean we have to collapse at any difficulty.
We can see the positive in every situation and continue to be grateful even on the grayest of days but don't beat yourself up for not always feeling your best, because it's normal.
but we can change these states by doing things that make us feel good.
if you want to make a big change in your life and you are already being more conscious, even changing your mentality you will see that there are people who may leave, it's completely fine! they have already fulfilled their work in your life, nothing happens, there will always be someone better who is more in tune with who you are being right now and bring you much more than those who left.
when we are in this process of change it is good to be alone, you have to know yourself, that is very important.
We have to learn to spend time with ourselves, listening to our thoughts and what we feel in order to know what we really want.
and the same goes for our self-love, first, we have to work on it to get everything else.
we may start out wanting a new job or a new relationship but if we haven't changed ourselves we will continue to attract the same type of people or opportunities as before.
i learned this from louise hay. she mentioned that she has a list of what her beliefs are and that is so helpful. it will help us to replace our old beliefs with new ones, the ones we want! it's so powerful.
some of your new beliefs can be:
good things always happen to me
i am a lucky girl/boy
I am prosperous
everything works out well for me
and i have learned much more during this journey of personal growth and I could continue sharing much more but i consider these to be the most important lessons, they are simple but powerful and my recommendation is that you reread them daily until they become part of your new beliefs because it will help you to understand much more.
