untoldhorrors

Fork found in Bathroom #Mystery #Unexplained

characters in movies love to wake up from surgery and immediately start ripping off all their medical equipment like theyre a sexy werewolf breaking their chains. brother you dont know if that tube is the only thing keeping you alive right now. calm down.

shitshit shit. umm no its fine. does anyone see a grenade pin on tbe floor

Limos are such a stupid status symbol. Like yeah I'm rich. Did you see how long my car

riding the highest horse you’ve ever seen back to my glass house

as part of their ongoing boycott, Canada will no longer provide the US with totally real long-distance girlfriends who definitely exist

she goes to the o-zone when i layer

if my cock grew legs i would send it to the store to get groceries

If alcohol can shorten your memory imagine what alcohol can do

she doing tricks with her pussy i guess she's a vagician

girl are you a medieval executioner bc you are torturing me with your rack

well its been nice talking, ill be in touching with you soon. i mean ill touch you in soon. fuck. i mean soon ill be touching in you. i mean keep in touching me. i mean ill be touch with you in it. Actually fuck it

americans be like dude learning to drive isnt that bad but they dont know youre in ireland sharing a lane with a horse who is a bad person. And the horse and the instructor are friends and he keeps dapping the horse up through the window. And the horse called you a bitch under his breath so quiet the driving instructor is trying to convince you that you must have misheard him but you didnt. and theres a roundabout coming up and the horse didnt indicate

used to think you were my bud but i got weiser

playing stupid games but im really bad at them so im not even winning the stupid prizes

Hate when I'm trying to find my luggage at the baggage claim but they all look the same. Many such cases.

Is this guy bothering you? cuz I could bother you too but in a different better way