365 days

Today I ate an entire package of red vines before biking home from work. I thought for sure I was going to have to take a puke stop but I made it home safely without purging myself.

I am paying for it now though big time.  I still feel pukey and my jaw hurts from all the fucking red vines and I have to go to work in an hour.  Shit.

Today was tough because I like to talk to people.  I didn't always like to talk to people.  In fact, I didn't always like people; however, I have recently come to the realization that there is much to learn from others.  Everybody sees things in their own unique perspective, and I find it interesting to hear their perspectives.  

So, from what the book says today wasn't exactly a don't say anything day, it was more of a day to say only what truly matters - words that need to be said.  I am at a crossroads with this challenge...

I didn't do very well on today's task.  I did ask random favors from some of my coworkers but I'm not sure how that is much different from any other day really.  I guess I didn't have much contact with any other people today - kind of a lonely day.  

I wonder if I have fallen into some kind of mini depressive mode since Brenda has been gone.  The daily tasks aren't the same without someone to share them with - someone to compare stories with.  However, I will keep on keeping on without her because she will be back soon and we can continue this little game of ours.  Miss you Brender boo - call me!  There's my task to you for the day!... --Chelsie

Day 33 was weird - not because I saw anything paranormal but because I had some funky ass dreams.  When I woke up in the middle of the night, I typed up a short synopsis of my dreams so that I wouldn't forget them.  Here is what I typed:

"I just had one of those waking dreams…

It started as a normal dream but I could totally feel it… a ghost attacked me at starbucks and drug me into the back room..  at the end of the dream I was lying on a bed talking with Margo (my starbucks boss). 

Then I was lying in the apartment in my bed reading a message on the wall (written on a piece of tape) from Brenda which I found odd because she is in Kenya although I knew I was really tired so I could have just been imagining it… then I heard the door rattle and I stayed really still because I didn’t know who it could be… maybe Brenda came home early?  A man walked in and I froze.. he walked very slowly into the bathroom, did something then came out and went into the main apartment.. he was rummaging around and I was too scared to move, then he came into the closet where I was with a grin on his face and climbed on top of me.. I kicked and hit, jumped up and ran to the bathroom to turn on the light to see who he was where I discovered that he had already taken out all the light bulbs so that I couldn’t see him… I was still trying to escape when I woke up…

 I felt both of these dreams with my entire body and I am not sure I can go back to sleep now.."

Hello everyone.  The post for day 31 is a little late, well, because I have been a little busy.  Brenda left for Kenya yesterday, so I went to sleep early in an attempt to avoid the silence of the apartment.  I miss her face and laugh already.  Anyways, moving on... 

Today the task is to write a note to the President of a tiny island (Nauru) to let them know they are not forgotten.  I just finished my note and will be sending it off in a few hours on my way to work.

According to the CIA World Factbook, Nauru is about 0.1 times the size of Washington D.C.  In other words, it is very small!  Also, they have been heavily mined for phosphate - probably bad news for them environmentally, but I suppose you have to make the paper somehow, someway.  

Day 29: Prank call someone about Jesus in a southern accent

On the day of my new-found sobriety, I placed a call that was very close to my heart regarding the state of an entirely random person's soul. I explained to the female voice on the other end of the line, the over-powering emotion of my conversion. My appeal moved the lady to such an extent that she offered a gift of twenty dollars to hear her prayer said on the radio. However, the prayer we heard was so personal, and selfless that we agreed to say her prayer on the radio free of charge.

And may the lord bless each and everyone you on this glorious summer evening,

The very reverent - Reverend Ross

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Day 28: Choose your final meal on death row and make it.

I can't really think of one specific meal that I would want on death row.  I think I would just want a last taste of many different things.  With this in mind, Brenda and I went to the gas station across the street from our apartment - we are regulars there.  I would say we browsed the aisles for a good 10 minutes (all the while the Asian was watching us) before picking out our last meal selections.  Mine consisted of oreos, red vines, and doritos.  I would have also added chips and salsa from The Matador, but I can't be driving all the way down there at 9 PM. 

Anyways, when we got home we put our snacks on dinner plates and sat down to eat.  Best last meal ever.  I almost feel like I could die now - ok not really, but I feel happy.  I also added wine to mine, but Brenda googled it, and we're pretty sure alcohol is not allowed at last meals.  Oh well.  -- Chelsie

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I think I did a pretty good job today of avoiding the words 'yes' and 'no'.  To accomplish this though, I had to use the word 'absolutely' A LOT, and it turns out people really respond to that.  I suppose when someone asks you something and you give an enthusiastic 'absolutely' the enthusiasm is contagious.  I like it.

It is hard to be conscious of everything you say though, especially with words like 'yes' and 'no' that so readily flow from the tongue.  I learned a lesson today that maybe I should focus more on the words that come out of my mouth.  I mean really, if it was so hard to pay attention today and remember what I said, I can't even imagine what I say on a completely oblivious day.  That shit is scary. I'm telling you, Brenda and I need a reality show.  Or at least a candid camera channel on youtube.  I think people would pay to watch our ridiculous lives. -- Chelsie

Day 26: Choose what you'd prefer to be reincarnated as

Again we have a very "blah" task for the day. Along with making our choice, we are supposed to send a $5 donation to the Dalai Lama... I suppose this is to ensure that our wishes are granted when we die. 

I, however, do not believe that we humans have souls. Thus reincarnation is just another thing we have conjured up to make ourselves feel better about our eventual deaths. Despite my hopeless beliefs, I went along with the task and chose the awesome beetle pictured above. If you know me at all, you know I love insects. They are little world-changing machines that deserve a lot more respect than they get. I'm fascinated by how some can live dormant for years (YEARS!) in certain life stages only to turn into adults that can't even eat and have a sole purpose of reproducing. Freaking neat. --Brenda

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For today there is a shit long list of shit in the book to look through and check off what you will never do before you die.  

We each checked off our stuff in the book - as shown in the picture (Chelsie in blue and Brenda in black); however, I'm not too sure about my list because of course how do you know for sure what you will or will not do before you die?  Hmm..so I just checked stuff that I am pretty freaking sure I will never do. --Chelsie

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We had some interesting differences of opinion here. I think my favorite agreement, though, was that neither of us will ever smoke a cat. --Brenda

I am sitting in the laundromat now, debating on whether or not I want to ask the attendant to barter with me. Brenda and I brainstormed some barter ideas before I left the apartment to come here, but none of them seem to appealing or are even possible now that I am actually here. Here were some of the ideas:

- ask a fellow laundry doer to trade some detergent for a dryer sheet

- ask someone to trade me a quarter for a pencil

- that's about all we could think of

So now I am here and the laundry attendant is nowhere to be found. I think she's in the back room with her dogs - I can hear them barking. Also, I am the only one here doing laundry right now. There is a teenage boy sitting outside in a car that I thought about approaching for bartering purposes, but that may seem kind of creepy. He's on the phone anyway, best not to interrupt him.

Since the laundromat was a bust, Brenda and I decided to barter amongst ourselves. Until we realized we don't have any material goods that we want to trade. Another day of fail. --Chelsie

Day 23: Make a no-obligation appointment with a plastic surgeon and see what he recommends.

We made an executive decision to not do the task for the day, as we both find it a little dumb and a lot impossible. We don't have that kind of time, book, who do you think we are? Also, we like ourselves because we're awesome and don't need someone telling us we need nose jobs and chin implants. Thanks.

Day 22: Today agree to meet someone in 10 years' time.  Fill in this coupon and hand it to a stranger or someone you hardly know.

We spaced on today and didn't agree to meet anyone.  We did however agree to meet each other in Watamu on May 8, 2022.  

I fully intend to keep this pledge and hopefully we will already be there, so it will only be a walk into town :)  I felt a little bad today because we didn't follow the book rules exactly, but really we forgot about it until about 11 PM and anyone out on the streets at that hour is probably not someone I want to agree to meet up with in 10 years.  I promise to be better about the book AND posting each day on time in the future.  Well, except for tomorrow because it's dumb.  You will see. --Chelsie

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Day 21: Patriotism Day

Today we had to choose a country out of the provided list in the book and "feel patriotic" about it for the day. I didn't really want to play today, but I begrudgingly chose Russia. Because really, who doesn't love Russia?

I spent the day silently thinking about "Mother Russia" and how sexy I think a lot of 20 to 40-something year old Russian men are. The book tells me that Russia's anthem is titled "The Patriotic Song" and has no lyrics. I can dig it. --Brenda

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Out of the suggested countries to show patriotism for and celebrate today I chose Nigeria.  So what I am obsessed with Africa... Anyways, here are a few things I have learned about Nigeria today:

- Nigeria is the 7th most populous country

- There are 521 registered languages spoken in Nigeria

- Nigeria has launched 4 satellites into space

- Nigeria has one of the highest literacy rates in Africa

- Nigeria was once under rule of the United Kingdom

I also sharpie-tattooed the Nigerian flag on my arm above my very real Kenya flag tattoo.  Today is Nigerian patriotism day for me after all.  Maybe I can cover my entire arm with flags of various African countries.  Too much?  Maybe.