i just love that little secret all women share. i love that even when a man thinks he’s got a woman who worships the ground he walks on, when he thinks he has complete control, that he’s the ultimate voice of authority and that he shits gold, that woman will privately know he’s stupid. even if she never says it, she’ll know

womanhood is actually just an extended piece of performance art called “yes, mister, you are very smart”

now you males out there may be thinking “but barbie, if that were true then wouldn’t all women be oscar-worthy actresses?” the answer is no. we don’t actually need to be good at pretending. that’s how dumb y’all are.

you may also be thinking “well *I* can tell when a woman is just placating or patronizing me”. that is also false. if you can tell, it’s because she wants you to know she’s making fun of you.

And you’re throwing our secret in the air like that ?

It’s cool they don’t believe me anyway 😂😭

IT WAS ALSO SUPPOSED TO BE TEMPORARY

i would like to.. become a bumble bee. sit on flowers. be yellow. not go to school. not understand capitalism.

on my way to steal your garden veggies 

use more olive oil

I didn’t even notice the url I was just like damn they’re right.

@k9kesi

And cats.  Blue Buffalo killed @sidneystrange ‘s cat.

I don’t know the full story behind the tweets above, but a Google search shows there HAVE been several recalls regarding this brand, especially in 2016. I would absolutely avoid as it is not worth the risk.

@ladycyon

Good god thank you so much for sharing this because I’ve lately been considering switching to this brand cus it’s supposed to be so much better than all the others but good god what the hell.

I worked in a vet for a little while and I shit you not, when a dog came in with constant diarrhea they were always eating Blue Buffalo. We changed the food and the dog got better every time. Blue Buffalo is garbage food and never feed it to your pets.

I’ve never heard of this brand but I love my dog with all of my heart and I’d be broken if I ever accidently fed her this and got her sick (people give me different dog food to try all the time). I’d hate for anyone else to lose their pet also.

um?? what the fuck? holy FUCK my boyfriend and I were just about to start feeding our cat blue buffalo omg

Wft really?? Im never going to buy that killer food!! Praying for your pets!

I’m so glad I know this, I’d be heartbroken if my dog died

I can’t stop thinking of this and how it describes white people’s attitude towards Mexican food perfectly.