ramblings of a slime

#if the three little piggies combined their powers they would be undefeatable (via @justanotherrandommoth)

something deeply charming about imagining modern britons starting to live in high-tech wattle-and-daub dwellings. return to the ways of your ancestors lmao.

*flies past*

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going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

clowngirl getting an orchiectomy and the surgeon just keeps removing ball after ball after ball after ball after

clown nurse standing by solemnly adding each successive ball to the ones she's already juggling

fat women with small dicks and a tummy bulging out more than the tits when. also when we figure it out can I see it?

can I PLEASE see it? pretty pleaseeeee?

[scrolling through old posts on my blog] I would not fucking say that

being friends with english majors is so fun you'll send a text like hey are you free for brunch and they'll respond with some shit like "haven't the faintest clue, my schedule is utterly fucked"

english majors so used to talking like 19th century british aristocracy they think this is a joke about busy schedules

Thank god they decided to make more

But In doing so…she created her biggest enemy…Jolene

World Heritage Post

I got lemon titties

Now calling my boobs Lemons.

10/10

official boob post