SHIT'S BITCHIN' !

               TAGGED BY   @scintillaz ^__^ ! i wuv u                TAGGING    @moonalign @sekisuji an.. whomstever else hasnt done this

        NON - SEXUAL  ACTS  OF  DOMINANCE  !     accepting.               calm    your muse telling mine to  ‘ just breathe ‘ .

      BLOOD  ROARS  IN  HIS  EARS :   SOMEONE’S GONNA DIE.     at this point, maybe it wouldn’t even have to be kamoshida.  the bastard’s words burn something  AWFUL  in his chest, like some wildfire left to raze the forests, the fields, someone’s childhood home,  and  he’s  pissed.  there’s a  meanness  coiling deep in his gut and pressing bright red crescents into his palms—  maybe, ryuji thinks, and he swears he tastes something metallic clotting at the back of his throat: he could kill himself,  or  should.  maybe things never would’ve gotten to this point if he’d never meddled in the first place, if he hadn’t been such a fucking idiot and ruined everything, or maybe if the old coach never quit, or if he didn’t take that scholarship and settled for mediocrity like he was  SUPPOSED  to.     so  many   what - if’s.    his eyes sting. 

             HOW  DID  HE  BECOME  SO  USELESS ?    he wants to cry, crush the chipped part of his heart into pieces under the heel of his trainers, be struck with a disaster that finally finishes what his father & kamoshida started.  when did his hands start shaking ?

           ‘  just  breathe.  ’         the  words  have  a  nasty  echo.

     ryuji doesn’t hear akira at first—  or doesn’t try to. it’s an  unwelcome  intrusion, coupled with the warmth of a calloused palm pressed to his forearm, and he’s about to snap a response when he seals his mouth sharply, half - afraid if he leaves his lips parted even a little, he’ll vent more poison into the air between them.  a sigh: strained—  his shoulders are still drawn taut, the burning in his palms from the uneven edges of chewed - on nails digging into the skin remains, but maybe he relaxes a little.