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This is not pro-ana bullshit. And if you ever encourage any sort of ED, log out right now.

1. How rarely you shit.

2. That it does not raise your self esteem. At all. No matter how thin you get.

3. That you probably won’t even be able to see results when you look in the mirror.

4. That your friends won’t immedietly be concerned over your weight loss. (Idk why. That’s a big part of what I wanted.)

5. That you’ll be jealous of how thin children are.

6. That you’ll be so guilty for doing so.

7. So much guilt. Constantly.

8. That it’s literally like there is another person controlling you. Often people will personify “Ana”. It’s really like that.

9. You’re not in control. At all.

10. Feeling fake because you’re not thin enough.

11. Or because you don’t drink black coffee.

12. Or because you eat 600 cal a day instead of 200.

13. Feeling fake in general.

14. Your weight won’t ever be your only concern when it comes to looks. Soon you’ll obsess over your hair, your face, your fucking privates. It is not limited to your weight. But it just feels like the only thing you can control.

15. How exhausting it is.

16. How you’ll lose interest in everything you had loved before. Hobbies will vanish. As will friends, passions, talents. All because of the desire for small boobs and a thigh gap.

17. You may not even get a thigh gap.

18. Weight will not change your bone structure.

19. That fast weight loss is fast weight gain.

20. How lonely it is.

21. How much anxiety you get over food. Not just the calories. Who you’re eating it in front of, how to avoid it, how to get rid of it.

22. That you really can’t stop whenever you want. I worry sometimes that I won’t be able to eat the candy on Halloween. Or the food at my prom. Or the cake at my wedding.

23. Thin does not equal pretty.

These will not apply to everyone with anorexia. And I am fully aware that other EDs exist. I hope that one day everything will be okay for all of you. And I hope that your okay means recovery.

I post things like thinspo and Ana shit because I have an addiction. A disorder. A physical difference in my brain that doesn’t allow me to fully grasp what exactly is so bad about any of this. Like so many others.

I love you all <3

PS,