Zelda and Books and Stuff

You’re not going to take two of us with a stick. Two marks says I could. Each. ...You afraid? Done then. Let us put an end to this farce after all. Dovie’andi se tovya sagain.

'I asked our new 00s at work to cut out all the useless words, and she did a really good job.'

Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real

There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations

Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that

The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.

There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)

The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.

Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.

Boop

wheel of time + onion headlines part 1

bonus:

WHEEL OF TIME 1.06 ||  The Flame of Tar Valon

yeaaaah Laila is the one thing I have the most problem with and don't understand what they were thinking there

I'm probably gonna get more into it when I make a post about all my thoughts, but I get why they changed Mat and Perrin and gave them actual lives and motivations because they were basically nothing the first few books, but like.....wtf where they thinking

and like I don't even really have a problem per se if they gave Perrin a wife (though I fail to see a way I'd like that route atm, but who knows what they could have done) but like....to literally just give him a wife so that they can kill her? like I feel like there were so many better/different things they could have done with Perrin that wasn't giving him motivation via inventing a character just to kill her