LABYRINTH

The cold was as familiar as my breath

And yet, these day I cannot help

But feel that something is missing

When I am not hearing your voice,

Not when I am not feeling the warmth

Of having you by my side.

Stars or none, my memory

Can't seem to recall,

Head full of thoughts

Yet none I remember

Except for the silent wish

That I had asked you to

Stay, so I could hold onto you

A little while longer.

You asked me out of blue,

My hands hover on the

Screen between us,

Thinking of what I should say.

I wanted to tell you, sunrise,

Because it reminds me of

That scene when I was talking

With you from midnight

Until the sun starts to awaken,

Of how seeing the light

Permeates the midnight blue

Made me smile uncontrollably.

But then I remembered

The way my sorrows

Trickled down my face

As I chase the setting sun

And how the way the light

Fades into darkness

Gave me some semblance

Of comfort I could not

Find in you.

You laughed lightly,

Noticing my unresponsiveness,

And repeated the question

At the same time I said,

"Both", this time you could not

Stop the chuckles that spilled,

Uttered the words,

"You really aren't good at deciding

What you like most, no? ",

I shrugged and did not tell you

That you are undoubtedly my favorite.

The way I felt

So happy and sad

At the same time

When I'm talking

With you,

It reminds me of

The time I wonder

How blue both

Makes me want

To smile and to cry

At the same time.

More poems for you,

Tried to think of

Countless metaphors

That will capture

The way you made me

Feel hope again,

The way seeing blue

Stopped making me

Think of sadness and

Started making me

Think of your smiles.

I wanted to write a poem

For you and the way

You awakened a part of me

I thought I lost a long time ago,

But I guess there are things

That could never be put into words.

Want to throw away

The very thing that

Makes me me,

Is perhaps the main

Reason why I badly

Feel the need to

Run away from you.

The words I badly wanted to say,

Maybe you can find them here

And if they do reach you,

Please tell me so I know

That all this time I wasn't

Writing for nothing.

It was because I associate coffee

with feelings of restlessness and worry,

Something that you haven't made me feel,

You made me feel like I did not need to sleep

Just to run away from things, because

I could probably finish them on time anyway.

When I think of coffee, I think of productivity

Things I have to do and responsibility

I could never run away from,

But your voice sounds like a lazy Saturday

Walking around the house wearing pajamas,

Heart peaceful and my mind at rest,

I sometimes wish I never left that place,

I always hope that I could have captured

Your voice and kept it for eternity.

You are the farthest thing from coffee

But I guess it would be a lie

If I said that you aren't my favorite.

I heard the words I wanted,

The clarity they bring me

Made me feel lighter.

When I finally

Get used to you,

The past taught me

My lessons well

And I already know

How this will end-

Me lying in the ruins

Of the promises I believed.

They expected me to say black

I can see it in their eyes

Black as the ink of a pen

Staining the pristine notes

With thoughts of a disturbed writer

They expected black as the shade of my love.

But my love is all the colors on the palette,

The paint on the fingers of an artist,

He's the spectrum of every extremes and those in between,

He's the mixture of both black and white, red and green,

He's both honest and mysterious,

He's both passion and calmness.

My love is all the colors on the palette

And all those that aren't.

I could lock my feelings

And throw away the key

In this storm breed

Remember the time when

I wanted to cut my tongue

After saying,

"I love you too".

People think

I have a way with words

Yet my sentences are so

Often misunderstood

That I stopped trying

To make them understand.

Lost in the crowd,

I tried to look for you

But strangers' backs

Block my way of maybe

Finding my way back to you.

(Isn't ironic how the world

Seems so keen on keeping us apart?)

To look at myself again

And not see how

You refused to listen

When I told you to stop,

Maybe I could forget