i'm insane

anyways we had a harry potter trivia event tonight and some of these team names are fuckin hogwild levels of funny. like.

we have one team that was just straight up “team edward”, who, halfway through the event, changed their name to “team jacob”

There was Wingaydium Lesbiosa, which, u kno, #mood

At least 4 different quidditch teams (puddlemere united, holyhead harpies, etc), which wouldn’t wouldn’t have been funny on its own but literally every runner up (2nd and 3rd tied, total of four teams) was a quidditch team 

and of course, the actual winner of best team name, hilariously appropo considering Canada’s recent weed law changes:

*villain du jour flirts with Spiderman* woah! I know I swing both ways, but your way isn’t one of em

***

Intellectual™ white supremacist: and when I’m done the entire world will be one homogeneous society-

Spidey: buddy the only homo-genius here is me step off

***

Villain: *gestures to the eyesore that is the Spiderman suit* what kind of fashion is this

Spidey, a gay, knowing that all his villains commit crime in their fursuits: fucking respectable is what it is

***

Villain, talking about the plague that is vigilantes: your way of life disgusts me

tom hardy doesn’t actually know he’s being possessed by an alien yet in the story. he’s just resigned himself to whatever fucking meltdown he seems to be having. he doesn’t even seem particularly surprised that things have gone this way for him. like ten minutes later he finds out his heart stopped working and hes just like “you asshole” and he throws his alien parasite against the wall like a water balloon. and then he just leaves and is immediately kidnapped. what a fucking wild ride tom hardy is on. 

tom hardy’s actual superpower is being the exact same level of dysfunctional no matter what is happening in his life. so when everything’s going ok for him he self-destructs spectacularly, but when literally everything that can happen to a human being happens to him, he does, like, unrealistically well. climbing into a lobster tank and eating a live animal with large claws just like… “well, this is what’s happening to me today. i’m so sorry you have to watch this, man. anyway here goes, i’m going to bite into a living creature with my human mouth and then LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS”

One teeny tiny question,

Also do not forget that Loki is a GOD who can teleport, he can multiply himself, he has telepathic abilities, he can read minds and force whatever he wants in anyone’s head, he has a silver tongue which gets him out of all sorts of trouble, he has inhuman strength, he has regenerative healing, and he’s a skilled warrior who SHOULD NOT need the Tesseract to get out of situations like that one because he’s

1OOO+ years old

fucking clever

BUUUUT let’s just scratch all of that and make him straight dumb and make his death the most fucked up, gruesome and also totally fucking useless one in the entire fucking franchise :) I still have nightmares about it occasionally even though I only watched it one (1) time

I’ll never forgive them how they wrote him out of the movies, and I am still pissed about it.

Ehi i made another Marvel commission.

(Comms are always open, just in case that maaaybe you’re interested!)

Clint: I have my bow and arrow ready in my sleep

Natasha: I have a gun under my pillow

Tony: Weak. Pathetic. All of you.

Steve: And what do you sleep with?

Let’s see what we have here.

Tom/Loki in midair, in a behind-the-scenes practice session stunt-leap for the Loki series production.^

What might this image tell us about the Loki series?

1. First, it appears that Tom’s particular physical strengths will be effectively showcased in the stunt choreography on this production. This is a good sign.

Tom is surprisingly adept at gymnastic stunts for such a tall man. Please note the perfect arch in Tom’s form here. This leap is so well executed. Look at the elegance of Tom’s form, his left arm so gracefully extended. Look at that amazing wingspan!

If this clip is typical of the type of stuntwork Tom will be doing, this production will effectively exercise his physical strengths: flexibility, fluidity, agility, precision, and speed. (These are also Loki’s strengths.) If someone is putting this kind of thought into the fight choreography, can we extrapolate that they might be putting as much thought into the production overall?

Tom is just a little slow on his timing to stick the landing on this particular jump—but what an awesome landing it will be when he nails it! By his posture on impact, it appears to be intended to be the classic superhero landing (on one knee).

But we’re not just talking about a landing in this case: Tom is doing the full leap, start to finish. This is a lot harder than being CGI’ed for 20 feet and dropped two feet for the last bit. If they manage to capture Tom visibly doing this entire leap himself—with the superhero landing—on camera, in one shot, it will be an awesome look.

2. Nobody does the big, superhuman stunt leaps like Tom Hiddleston. There’s a reason we’ve seen Loki perform some of the largest, longest, and highest complete jumps in the MCU: Tom is very good at aerial work.

On a spectrum:

CH has great physical strength, but he’s not so agile when he’s at Thor weight.

CEvans is both incredibly agile and strong—he’s an amazing all-around athlete.

Tom has balletic agility and grace. He’s not weak—he’s wiry. He’s flexible and he’s got stamina. He’s built to fly.

3. More importantly, have a look at Tom’s right hand in the new behind-the-scenes clip from the Loki series.

The stuntwork in this new clip is clearly a practice run, but look what he’s practicing: his right hand in a grip held up, extended far away from his body—he will be holding something in his right hand in the final version of this stunt.

This positioning is undoubtedly deliberate. As any gymnast could tell you, an uneven positioning of the hands will throw off your balance. Tom is going to have to keep a perfect balance despite this additional element, and land this stunt—without the use of his right hand!

What could this object in his right hand possibly be? Hmmm... I think his arm is out so far because the object he will be holding is something that could otherwise get entangled in his legs and/or upper body. Something that extends both upward and downward from his grip: a staff or scepter. Does this mean that in the Loki series Loki will have his scepter from Avengers1 (Assemble)?!

Loki’s scepter holds the Mind Stone. So, will Loki have both the Tesseract (Space Stone) and the Mind Stone in the series?

We know Loki will be traveling through time in the series: will he also have the Time Stone?

With possibly three of the Infinity Stones in hand will the series be about Loki questing for all of the Infinity Stones? Six episodes—six stones?

Why would Loki go on a quest to collect all of the Infinity Stones knowing Thanos is also searching for them? (Thanos would still be alive in Loki’s alternate reality.) Does Loki want to collect the stones to use them as a bargaining chip with Thanos? Or does Loki plan to use the Infinity Stones himself? Perhaps to defeat Thanos—who tortured Loki and used mind control on him? Or to overpower Odin and take the throne of Asgard—this time in his own form? Would he then also claim Jotunheim?

4. If Loki will be holding his Avengers scepter in the final version of this stunt, this will be a very risky stunt for a lead actor to perform, himself.

Let me explain why I think this is a particularly risky stunt. As previously discussed, this type of aerial stunt is harder than it looks, particularly because Tom will be holding something in his right hand, which will require him to do some tricky balancing.

Obviously, in this stunt, Tom is also moving at a high speed, and at a substantial height in the air, and for a significant distance. But on top of all that, if he is carrying Loki’s scepter, he will be making this leap while holding a heavy, big, pointy thing. Not a hammer, not a shield, not even a knife—a pointy thing that has multiple blades coming out at different angles.

Of course, they would use a blunted version of the scepter for this stunt. But even a blunted prop weapon would be extremely dangerous at such a speed, with a landing of this force.

Tom once told a story about the Jotunheim fight scene on the Thor set, when he used Loki’s throwing knives. (I can’t find the clip where he talks about this, but it would have been from an interview he did sometime between 2010 and 2013.) Tom said that after they finished filming the scene, he couldn’t find one of the blunted prop knives he’d thrown. It turned out that he had thrown it so hard the knife was imbedded in the wall of the set.

5. Tom Hiddleston has no fear, and he is all-in on the Loki show.

Based on Tom’s own words and the comments of others, we know:

Tom always wants to perform as many of his own stunts as they will let him.

Tom is a perfectionist.

Tom is emotionally invested in this production, not only because he loves Loki, but also because this is his first chance, after 11 years, to perform as the lead in a Marvel production.

Thus, I surmise that Tom is prepared to put everything he’s got into this production. Like, even more than usual—and he usually puts his whole body, heart, and soul into his work. This series could contain Tom’s finest work yet.

6. The fact that Marvel is allowing Tom to do a stunt as dangerous as this one could reflect that he has significantly more decision-making power on this series than in the previous films.

Tom has done big stunts like this before, but never when he was playing the lead character, with the entire production depending on his safety. He’s more valuable to Marvel now, and also more expensive as a commodity, since he’s more famous and successful now.

So, why is Marvel allowing Tom to do this difficult and risky stunt, himself? I’m gonna go out on a limb and say it’s because Tom insists—and on this production, unlike others in the past, he actually has the clout to make executive decisions. If so, this would be a very good sign for the Loki series.

*Note: Lelliefant’s speculations are sometimes uncannily correct but occasionally way, way off base. Lelliefant claims no responsibility for any lost bets or damages otherwise incurred by Tumblr readers resulting from adherence to the aforementioned speculations.