you are in my fantasy

As requested by @j-deering (Sorry it got out of order. Don’t know what happened.) 

“You turned down Casey? Jane, why? I thought you loved him.”

“Maybe I did, maybe I do, but I’m not the marrying type. I don’t think I ever want to get married.”

“Maybe Casey just wasn’t the right person, but I don’t think you’ll never get married.”

“I won’t, Maur. It’s not right for me. I don’t think I’m equipped to handle marriage. Can we just drop it for now. I don’t want to think about it.

👮🏻‍♀️👩🏼‍⚕️

That conversation was nearly a year ago, Jane recalled. That was six months before she started dating Maura. She had meant every word of it at the time. She still did now, didn’t she? If that was true, then why had she just been thinking about it? She couldn’t really be thinking about marriage now. She cast a glance at Maura, who was reading a book at the other end of the couch. Jane smiled. She loved Maura so much. She wanted to spend her life with her.

There was that idea again. Marriage. Jane toyed with it a bit since it was in her head anyways. It didn’t sound so bad. Not much would change, only legally. They lived together already. They could start a family whether they were married or not, though being married might make that part a bit easier. Maura knew how she felt about marriage or at least how she had felt. She wasn’t yet sure if she felt differently about it now.

She had never asked Maura her opinion on the subject. She always assumed she’d be all for it. She pictured her planning a big, fancy wedding, saying elaborate vows that Jane would probably only understand half of. Jane laughed to herself, picturing it all. "Jane, are you okay over there?” Maura had looked her way, probably because Jane had laughed out loud.

“Yeah, Maur, I’m fine. I was just thinking.” Jane went quiet for a moment and Maura went back to her book. “Maur,” Jane interrupted after only a few seconds. “Do you ever think about marriage?”

That was a topic she hadn’t expected from Jane. She looked at her for a moment, trying to read her expression, but no luck. “Are you proposing?” She wasn’t sure if that was the right thing to say, but there it was. She had said it.

Jane looked shocked for a minute, and Maura feared she had just screwed everything up between them. Then Jane seemed to blink off the surprise and the next thing she knew Jane was down on one knee in front of her. “Yeah, I want to marry you, Dr. Isles, if you’ll let me.”