:))))

idk maybe domestic abuse trials shouldn’t be treated as entertainment

Just because your house is haunted doesn't mean the ghosts are causing all the weird shit you're experiencing. Like, yes, be polite to the restless dead, but also check for carbon monoxide.

your carbon monoxide detector died and the ghosts are trying to warn you

haunted by the ghost of my carbon monoxide dectector

dropped my rabbit and their head broke off :(

chocolate rabbit. chocolate. rabbit. edible chocolate easter rabbit. chocolate. not real. not furry rabbit. chocolate. the chocolate head of the chocolate bunny broke off. all chocolate. no living creature

I think my dream job would be sitting in the writers' room for tv shows and just telling them when their ideas are bad. They don't even have to pay me, I'd do it for free. Really I don't even need a chair. I'll just stand in the corner.

the only man to ever experience female hysteria was gerard way. i know this because i listen to their music

you know what, fuck you *unkills your character*

the reason battinson would be the ideal batman to give a robin is because he has the right mindset to think appropriate activities for 8 year olds include crime fighting

its so wild to me that the medici family still exists. motherfuckers are old money

people on twitter are like "you have generational wealth if your parents buy you groceries" meanwhile these bitches are living in beverly hills mansions bought with their great great great grandpappys investment banking money from 1378

Imagine having an ancestor who's playable in civ

imagine having an ancestor who gets killed in an assasains creed game

objectifying men in armor will literally never get old. like, work it shiny boy. hit ‘em with that old razzle dazzle you fuckin trash can. hottie! (tucks $5 into your cuirass)